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  1. #1
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Somethings Aren't What They Seem (mo' testesterone)

    This is just another one of those stories that are so funny to me. They typical, "I look good so I can kick your arse rider" misconception....It's just so funny to me that we are underestimated cause of our typical Clyde/Athena looks.

    Well, Gina and I are our reststop talking with a few friends after 40 miles on the road. We're talking rides, organized rides and some of the tough ones we've done. Some dude pulls up and parks his bike right next to us. Wow, what a beautiful bike! It's full out Timetrial race bike with aerobars. The rims are supersweet. I'm sure that the rims alone are more expensive than both my bikes put together. I see the guy's bike and yes, I'm envious! I look at him and his shorts and jersey are the same exact color of his bike. Now that had to be special order. Just looking at the outfit and the bike, I was very envious!

    So we continue talking about our past rides but this dude keeps looking me up and down. Superfit looking guy ,sure he's thinking, "you don't look all that". I notice the looks but I just smirk and look at the guy like "you don't know what I got!". I think I'm the only guy that notices but he goes into the restroom and Gina says, "did you get a load at that guy, the looks?". I just laugh and say, he doesnt' seem to like me much!"....So he sucks down a Gu and looks real cool doing it but continues with the looks. No biggie, just fun!

    So we head out and sure enough, here comes the looker! Now I'm the guy that doesn't leave my wife alone on the road so I only do what she'll allow me to do. She tells me when we're going to fast, too hard etc. This is one day I wish I were alone and on my single since I can carry a better pace on my own and able to sprint at will without approval.

    But we're rolling down the trail doing a decent pace. Maybe 19 which is great after 40'ish miles. JUST THEN!!!! The dude rolls by and buzzes us!

    Oh baby it's on! Gina is rarely the person to say, "'what a jerk" but his day she does! She says "step on it, let's see what he's got!" Ohhhhh BABY!!!!!.. We kicked it up into the twenties. He fades after a mile or so and we roll on by. Gina asks, "did you see his face, hes' sweatin' like a dog!" I said no but is he still near. Yeah and he's giving chase!

    So we pick it up and hold it! Little by little the guy falls back. Since we're already rolling. Lets just keep it going. I look back every so often just to rub his nose! About 6 more miles and the dude is gone! He was a good size dude, maybe 180 and looked strong and fit. So I tell Gina after he's gone, "that will teach him to buzz my big arse!".

    We keep the pace the entire 12 mile remainder of our ride till we are stopped about 1/4 before our stop. I'm pretty tired but we stop as a forum member recognized us form the pics and waved us down. So we stop and chat for a bit then he takes our pic. Just after we finish posing for pics, the sleek looking dude rides by huffing and puffing. Wish I had that cheesy grin while taking the pics! This was me when he rolled by...He's about 4 minutes behind which was really surprising to me! I thought he'd be better!

    The pic the other SoCal member took of us! Just cracks me up since we are not the typical cycling models. I look pigeon toed in the pic and Gina's is the typical "honey, does this spandex make my butt look big?" pic!



    Do we look like riders?

  2. #2
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Is she goosing me?

  3. #3
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    We was just chillin' before he arrived!


  4. #4
    Senior Member rdtompki's Avatar
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    Another great story from the wilds of Upland, CA.
    Rick T
    --------
    Volagi - Triple"ized" and Tubeless
    daVinci Joint Venture

  5. #5
    NadaKid wayne pattee's Avatar
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    Wow, light jacket and no balaclava.
    Must be nice.

  6. #6
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wayne pattee View Post
    Wow, light jacket and no balaclava.
    Must be nice.

    It was actually nice the last few days. On MY day it was COLD (for us Calif folk). Not many out here on NYday, not even Gina!...I was out the day after. One guy saw my glove all ripped up (tire wiping) and asked if I was cold. I said "I'm here to ride my bike , not look purty!" Bunch-O-Babies! It hasn't been less than 40.

  7. #7
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    you and your massive guads droped the hamer! (as ryan f would say)
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

    1990 Diamond Back MTB
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    www.cohocyclist.blogspot.com
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  8. #8
    Senior? Member
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    Good job You really should have posted this in the roadie forum, though

  9. #9
    Senior Member DieselDan's Avatar
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    That, Mr. Beanz, was the ultimate posuer.
    Bikes use brakes to stop.

    If your bike has breaks, don't ride it.

  10. #10
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by petflunky View Post
    Good job You really should have posted this in the roadie forum, though
    You kidding! Everytime I post a thread about a pretty boy in uniform they get their feelings huwt!...M'eh, I don't worry about he skinnies when I outweigh them all by 70 lbs! I have yet for one to physically attack me! Send them a nasty note, they change thier tunes rather quickly. Well the ones that live near by anyway!

  11. #11
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by petflunky View Post
    Good job You really should have posted this in the roadie forum, though
    I must say he DID LOOK GOOD though! Loved the bike. I'm thinking maybe take myh 98 Cannondale and challenge him to a race for pinks next time. Maybe some more padding around the middle, maybe some foam rubber like the Klumps!

    Maybe he'll throw in the outfit!

  12. #12
    Senior? Member
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    Would you even fit in the outfit, or just be able to use it to wipe down your new ride after you win?

  13. #13
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by petflunky View Post
    Would you even fit in the outfit, or just be able to use it to wipe down your new ride after you win?
    ......Ha, god,..........good one! Maybe cut it up and make a saddle cover from it, so I will always remember the buttface!

  14. #14
    Senior? Member
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    How about making it into a flag, and attach it to your bike? I'm sure you have an old bike flag somewhere that can donate its pole. Or, just keep in in your saddlebag, then "run it up the mast" when you have the roadies in your sights!

    edit: Kind of like what pirates did in the old days, with their pirate flags :0)
    Last edited by petflunky; 01-05-09 at 07:36 PM.

  15. #15
    Senior Member
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    Enjoy the tale.

    The real HERO, Mrs. Beanz!

    Love her smile and you are one very luck dude to have a bride that shares your passion to ride down the kit with I am sure, judgmental gazes.

    Has she come down from the rush?

  16. #16
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Yes, Gina is a very modest gal. I'm really shocked the days she says "get 'em". Never talks about it unless I bring it up for a laugh!

  17. #17
    Keep on, keepin on B Piddy's Avatar
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    Another awesome tale by the great Mr. Beanz. Flippin sweet
    04 Giant Sedona
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  18. #18
    Senior Member cyclefreaksix's Avatar
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    Dude, your gloves...(j/k!)

  19. #19
    Senior Member atcfoody's Avatar
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    I love it when some jerk who desperately has it coming to them gets what they deserve. Well done Beans, well done.

    In other news, Becky loves Gina's helmet. She has the same one.

    D
    Help me and team North UMC at the 2010 Pedal for Peace.

    Everything looks better on a full stomach.

    Doing the right thing and rocking the boat are often one in the same.

    Well, technically speaking, one needs 3 things to qualify for recumbent ownership: a beard, an aerobelly, and a technical degree or background.

  20. #20
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Cool, Gina loves the helmet!

  21. #21
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    Someone needs to create a stamp for Beanz so everytime he drops a skinny he can put a stamp on his bike!
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

    1990 Diamond Back MTB
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    www.cohocyclist.blogspot.com
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  22. #22
    runnin' down a dream edbikebabe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cohophysh View Post
    Someone needs to create a stamp for Beanz so everytime he drops a skinny he can put a stamp on his bike!
    Do the roadies get to call you fatties now?

  23. #23
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by edbikebabe View Post
    Do the roadies get to call you fatties now?
    Yup
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

    1990 Diamond Back MTB
    2007 Leader 736R
    www.cohocyclist.blogspot.com
    http://www.loopd.com/members/cohocyclist/Default.aspx



  24. #24
    Senior Member
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    Just curious but in the first pic I see bar end shifters and funky bars closer to you and Gina. Where you guys out on the tandem? I ride with a few couple who have tandems and man on flats and decents two good riders can fly, only about 2 or 3 of us guys in the club can stay with them. I'm somewhat like you by the sounds of it only thing is there are now lots of guys who don't even try it anymore, they just laugh and say a guy your size just shouldn't be that fast. I like the nice kit and all but for the most part they are just poseurs.
    Best thing about cycling is when I'm at work I'm thinking of cycling, when I'm cycling I'm thinking about cycling.

  25. #25
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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    Yup, tandem! They kick butt!

    I thought I mentioned it in the op , but looking back, I guess not!..But don't worry, Gina can do the same pace on her single for the 12 mile stretch!

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