Advertise on Bikeforums.net



User Tag List

Results 1 to 23 of 23

Thread: Squirrelicide?

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Alabama
    My Bikes
    Giant Sedona, vintage unknown. Gary Fisher Hoo Koo E Koo, vintage unknown.
    Posts
    127
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Squirrelicide?

    I took a nice ride yesterday evening, about 12 miles or so. Hey! Shaddup! That IS a nice ride for me.

    Anyways, this ride just goes over to one of few streets in my town with bike lane, and then to a nice little training bump. I say bump, because compared to what some of you do, it's not a hill or a climb, just a bump in the road. But for me it's a real hill and it still kicks my bum, but sooner or later I'm gonna kick back. But I digress, this story is about what happened on the way to the hill.

    So I took the side streets over to this one street with a bike lane. The side streets have very little traffic and I'm free to do what I please, except of course for the stop signs. Btu I finally make it over to the bike lane which is on a busier street, so naturally traffic also picks up.

    So I'm going down this one hill just past the Korean church, and theres oncoming traffic, and a vehicle approaching from behind. Lo and behold now is when the freakin squirrel decides to try and cross the road! From my side of the road! Of course he darts half-way out in the road, then turns back and runs up on the grass. Ok. everything is fine.

    After the vehicle from behind passes, I took a quick look at the speedometer and I'm only going about 23 at the time (don't laugh that IS fast for me). I look back up in the bike lane and there's the squirrel! Half-way across he turns back toward the grass! Then he dances the death dance in the bike lane! Now I don't know about you, but I'm not swerving into traffic with my 250 lbs. on a Gary Fisker HKEK while going downhill at 25mph to avoid a suicidal squirrel!

    Yep. Front wheel. Rear wheel. Bumpity bump. Didn't look back, too busy making sure I'm not on the road a few yards from him. Looked for him on my return trip, but decided it wasn't worth crossing the street to return to the scene of the incident.

    So the question is.... can I be charged for this? Will there be little pictures of me on wanted posters throughout the squirrel communities? Will they form a lynch mob and come after me, digging up the yard, leaving pine cones pieces all over my car? Should I be afraid of squirrel "street justice"? Have you ever done this?

  2. #2
    Bikezilla Mazama's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Flori-Duh
    My Bikes
    Co-Motion Mazama
    Posts
    881
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I actually ran over an Opossum (I think they are far more stupid than squirrels). I returned to the scene about an hour later and it was gone. It must have crawled off, or got hauled off by another predator.
    14,000 miles and rolling...

  3. #3
    Senior Member bbeck's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    GallatinTn
    My Bikes
    2008 Specialized Sequoia Elite
    Posts
    510
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    you might get a visit from joey one nut watch your back






    Brandon Gallatin, Tn.
    http://www.strava.com/athletes/bwbeck

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Alabama
    My Bikes
    Giant Sedona, vintage unknown. Gary Fisher Hoo Koo E Koo, vintage unknown.
    Posts
    127
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Oh no!
    I'm gonna have to get in witness protection!

  5. #5
    Senior Member Shimagnolo's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Zang's Spur, CO
    Posts
    6,292
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    A month ago, I'm driving home and 2 blocks from the house I encounter
    a car coming from the opposite direction stopped for a squirrel.

    The squirrel is standing in front of the car doing:
    - Look left
    - Look right
    - Look up at car
    - look toward me
    - rinse, and repeat

    I slow down, but since it seems the squirrel has no immediate
    plans to choose a direction, I just continue driving by.

    So of course just as I'm even with the squirrel, he suddenly
    decides on a direction. I felt a thump from the right rear
    tire, and looked back to see him flopping in the street.

    So now I feel bad about flattening a squirrel, and someone in
    my neighborhood thinks I'm a cruel b*st*rd for killing the
    squirrel they were waiting for, but I swear it looked like
    a suicide to me.

  6. #6
    Tilting with windmills txvintage's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North Texas 'Burbs
    My Bikes
    Many
    Posts
    4,832
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by bbeck View Post
    you might get a visit from joey one nut watch your back

    Or worse

  7. #7
    Lance Legweak HIPCHIP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Woodland, California, USA
    My Bikes
    Felt Z-70, GT RTS-2
    Posts
    803
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Thousands of starving people in the world and you leave good food! You're grounded. GO TO YOUR ROOM!

  8. #8
    Senior Member snowman40's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    My Bikes
    Fuji
    Posts
    1,135
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Do baby bunnies count?



    The first one tried to jump through my front wheel. The second tried to jump the gap the triangle (does that space have a name?), hit the bottle cage and went under the rear wheel. No bumps, but then I am close to 290 when it happened so hopefully it was quick and painless.
    Quote Originally Posted by snowman40
    If you must speed up to pass me, you don't deserve to pass me
    Quote Originally Posted by abstractform20 View Post
    farts are greatly appreciated as long as the other riders are talented and experienced. at the precise moment of release, a vacuum is formed. this is the optimal time for the rider behind you to get as aero as possible and "ride the brown rhino". his face should be within 2-3mm of the anus to receive maximum benefit (reduced drag...duh, its in a vacuum). i have hit speeds of over 53mph in such conditions.

  9. #9
    Senior Member TinyBear's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    My Bikes
    Giant Boulder SE
    Posts
    73
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Back when i was a kid i ran over a snake. It kept going though and so did i.
    My Bicycles: Giant Boulder SE, Giant Seek 1
    My cheater bike: 2010 Honda CBF600SA

  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Alabama
    My Bikes
    Giant Sedona, vintage unknown. Gary Fisher Hoo Koo E Koo, vintage unknown.
    Posts
    127
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    First and foremost... that prehistoric gorrilla squirrel is frightening!

    Quote Originally Posted by HIPCHIP View Post
    Thousands of starving people in the world and you leave good food! You're grounded. GO TO YOUR ROOM!
    ok. I didn't think about it in that context. I need to think more like the Necromongers.... Keep what you kill.

    Quote Originally Posted by snowman40 View Post
    Do baby bunnies count?
    Yes! Baby bunnies count! Adn they're much cuter than squirrels.

    Thank you all for making me feel better about it. Except for the cruel b*st*rd whoe drove over a squirrel that someone else allowed to pass! (LOL! I'm kidding of course.)

  11. #11
    circus bear ban guzzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Austin
    My Bikes
    97(?) GT Richochet, 00 Schwinn SuperSport
    Posts
    642
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by DelusionalDude View Post


    So the question is.... can I be charged for this? Will there be little pictures of me on wanted posters throughout the squirrel communities? Will they form a lynch mob and come after me, digging up the yard, leaving pine cones pieces all over my car? Should I be afraid of squirrel "street justice"? Have you ever done this?


    Squirrels send out a 'volunteer' to ensure food keeps coming from the Giant Pink Ones. Said volunteer bravely throws itself in harms way for the greater good of the community and a consistent supply of nachos, twinkies and that sort of thing...

    Actually, I had one a couple of years ago try to do the hoop jump thru my chainrings and chain. It didn't work out well for him....
    Car Free Life.
    Riding without a brake is like saying that you trust traffic. ~ jonestr

  12. #12
    Great State of Varmint Panthers007's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Dante's Third Ring
    Posts
    7,481
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Ride in a butcher's apron with cutlery strung on the handlebars. Squirrel - it tastes like chicken.
    How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

  13. #13
    creaky old bones FZ1Tom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Springfield, Misery
    My Bikes
    Trek 7200
    Posts
    267
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I might get caned for this, but I can't resist - there were squirrels around the Korean church?

    Tom

  14. #14
    Lance Legweak HIPCHIP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Woodland, California, USA
    My Bikes
    Felt Z-70, GT RTS-2
    Posts
    803
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by TinyBear View Post
    Back when i was a kid i ran over a snake. It kept going though and so did i.
    I was practicing MX once and went into a turn. Snake was in the middle of the turn! He didn't appreciate me running over his back and tried to bite me!!! Hard to do a turn with both feet up in the air above my bars!!!!!

  15. #15
    Senior Member Plynthblox's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Denver, CO
    My Bikes
    1981 Univega Viva Sport
    Posts
    82
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I've never hit an animal on my bike, but I have hit a fox and a pigeon before. I always stop to make sure it was a clean kill and that they're not suffering. If there's a chance that they'll survive I'd definitely try to get the animal to a vet though... I'm a big softy.

    I agree with not riding into traffic though... it'd be ironic as hell that 10 minutes after I got hit the squirrel would still get hit, and I just know that would be the case.

    Learn how to whistle nice and loud, that often makes 'em stop dead in their tracks and a lot easier to predict. I don't think it'd really help though when they're already panicking though.

  16. #16
    Senior Member snowman40's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    My Bikes
    Fuji
    Posts
    1,135
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by DelusionalDude View Post
    First and foremost... that prehistoric gorrilla squirrel is frightening!


    ok. I didn't think about it in that context. I need to think more like the Necromongers.... Keep what you kill.


    Yes! Baby bunnies count! Adn they're much cuter than squirrels.

    Thank you all for making me feel better about it. Except for the cruel b*st*rd whoe drove over a squirrel that someone else allowed to pass! (LOL! I'm kidding of course.)
    Are you disturbed when you hit a bug with your windshield or swallow gnats???? They are just as dead as that squirrel.....

    Of course, you probably fed another animal....
    Quote Originally Posted by snowman40
    If you must speed up to pass me, you don't deserve to pass me
    Quote Originally Posted by abstractform20 View Post
    farts are greatly appreciated as long as the other riders are talented and experienced. at the precise moment of release, a vacuum is formed. this is the optimal time for the rider behind you to get as aero as possible and "ride the brown rhino". his face should be within 2-3mm of the anus to receive maximum benefit (reduced drag...duh, its in a vacuum). i have hit speeds of over 53mph in such conditions.

  17. #17
    Eternal Newbie Kevrob's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Connecticut
    My Bikes
    Univega Trail
    Posts
    244
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Suicide Squirrel? First appeared in Tales of The Jackalope #2 - http://www.comics.org/details.lasso?id=320992

    Kevin
    Last edited by Kevrob; 06-15-09 at 01:10 PM.

  18. #18
    Bianchi Goddess Bianchigirll's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Camp Hill, PA
    My Bikes
    Too many to list here check my signature.
    Posts
    20,063
    Mentioned
    29 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    be nice tom of course they were not near the church they know to stay away from there *giggle*

    Now DD if the next day when you rode that way if there was white squirrel outline on the road you may be a wanted man
    Bianchis '87 Sport SX, '90 Proto (2), '91 Boarala 'cross, '93 Project 3, '88 Trofeo, '86 Volpe, '89 Axis, '79 Mixte SOLD, '99 Mega Pro XL Ti, '97 Ti Megatube, , '90 something Vento 603,

    Others but still loved,; '80 RIGI, '80 Batavus Professional, '87 Cornelo, '86 Bertoni (sold), '09 Motobecane SS, '98 Hetchins M.O., '09 K2 Mainframe, '89 Trek 2000, '?? Jane Doe (still on the drawing board), '90ish Haro Escape

  19. #19
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Alabama
    My Bikes
    Giant Sedona, vintage unknown. Gary Fisher Hoo Koo E Koo, vintage unknown.
    Posts
    127
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Bianchigirll View Post
    be nice tom of course they were not near the church they know to stay away from there *giggle*

    Now DD if the next day when you rode that way if there was white squirrel outline on the road you may be a wanted man
    I avoided that route for a couple of weeks.
    I went back through yesterday on my loop back home, there was no incident. But I did notice a lot of the squirrels stopped what they were doing and just watched as I rode by. I think they were conspiring about something. I just have to make sure to give them more time to forget.

  20. #20
    Senior Member jaxgtr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Jacksonville, FL
    My Bikes
    Cannondale SuperSix, Trek 7300, Trek CrossRip
    Posts
    3,931
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I had one take out my front wheel once and he\she committed suicide plain an simple. It was on a fence post and then just darted out and jumped toward my front spokes. I went down, landed in some nice soft turf luckily, I was not happy, then that is when I noticed the body of the animal lodged between my wheel and the fork. The wheel was ruined, broke spots and severly bent rim. It's almost like it was planning it. One of the folks I was with swears it slowed down to time the jump into my wheel since I was slowing to try and avoid it.
    Brian | 2013 Cannondale SuperSix 5 | 2014 Trek CrossRip Comp | 2003 Trek 7300
    Quote Originally Posted by AEO View Post
    you should learn to embrace change, and mock it's failings every step of the way.

  21. #21
    Senior Member Eclectus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Kansas
    My Bikes
    Cervelo RS, Specialized Stumpy, Schwinn 974
    Posts
    1,874
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    If it's moving across your path, or standing with its tail out, try to go behind it. They tend to speed up, rather than stop, or scoot ahead rather turn back around. Also +1 on whistling, or just yelling at them, "Move it, Stupid."

  22. #22
    Senior Member Waxbytes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    510
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I scared one half to death once. I was rolling down this hill when a black squirrel came out from the side of the road looking at the traffic as if it was going to cross. It didn't see or hear me coming downhill fast. I passed it pretty much nose to spoke. I didn't know squirrels could scream in fright.
    Maybe it wasn't a squirrel but some other small furry animal, I didn't get a good look as I was passed it in a split second.
    Uhmm...

  23. #23
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Longwood, FL
    My Bikes
    Giant Sedona, Giant FCR
    Posts
    28
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    i hit 2 in one ride about a month ago......
    poor sobs

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •