Don't read this thread until you read this :
Today I became a clydesdale. My thoughts when I woke up this morning are all captured in the thread above. It was bad at the time.
And then this morning, a friend named Nita that I have known since high school (6 years ago) knew I was having a rough time. She had her friend pick me up and take her to the bar she (Nita) works at. Gave me free drinks and shots, and paid $40 for a cab to take me home.
As for the girl I talked about in the other thread, I told her today that I needed time away, and I will come back when I am ready to be her friend.
I snapped out of my depression of 2 months today fully for the first time. I feel hungry, and (earlier) I rode the bike and it felt amazing! There's no need to ride like a savage animal (although I will still, just in a happy way).
All those great things happened today, but I would like to especially thank RandoneeRider for his post on the thread I linked to. I would say it kick started the positive thoughts today... I felt like I got a good kick in the rear this morning for not appreciating what I have. I needed it.
The bike I have has about 500 miles on it, I got it about 35 days ago. Today was the first time I rode it with such a great outlook on life! Pic attached below.
I advise anyone that is in a hard situation, to keep on the bike. Not like I did though. I lost 42lbs, the VERY VERY VERY hard way... remember that everyone says "you will get there"... and it always seemed like just a positive saying for me. But you will, and I will. As for now, I am not going to post on this thread again here unless someone really wants me to.
Tomorrow I will ride like a savage animal, but when I get home I will have a smile on my face and eat some chicken strips. Because it's my favorite food and I haven't had anything like that in 2 months. It's time to live. Remember these words (not by me):
For years I believed that it was necessary to keep going, no matter what. The burdens that life heaped upon you only made you stronger. The man in this sculpture literally plows through life, dragging a monstrous anchor behind him and having to develop Herculean strength to continue his unending task.
It is not a grim outlook. I simply cut the chain.