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Thread: Starting over

  1. #1
    Fat Guy Rolling dcrowell's Avatar
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    Starting over

    I was very happy when I lost 100lbs. I've slowly gained back 30.

    I've been eating poorly for 18 months now. I quit tracking what I eat. I have an unhealthy relationship with food.

    I rode 70 miles yesterday, but I stopped for pizza mid-ride and ate the whole thing. I can't ride enough miles to make up for my eating habits.

    I dropped below 200 lbs briefly in March 2010, so I've giving myself until March of 2012 to get there again. I intend to get down to 175 by September 2010.

    I'll start tracking everything I eat again. I'm going easy on breads/sugars/carbs/grains, and sadly, cutting my beer consumption.

    I know many of us here have been through this. I'm mainly just venting and being angry at myself.
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    Gears? CliftonGK1's Avatar
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    Since you know what the issue is and you're already on track to address it, you might take a look locally if there's an Overeaters Anonymous meeting. Sounds like you know exactly what you need; some personal support and maybe some additional accountability (which you're already doing with the journal tracking.)
    "I feel like my world was classier before I found cyclocross."
    - Mandi M.

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    Fat Guy Rolling dcrowell's Avatar
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    I never even thought about OA. There are NINE meeting locations of them within five miles of my house. I'll have to learn more.
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    Gears? CliftonGK1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcrowell View Post
    I never even thought about OA. There are NINE meeting locations of them within five miles of my house. I'll have to learn more.
    Might be worth checking out. Remember, because of the loose structure of the organization, no two meeting groups will be the same. If you don't like one meeting, see if another one suits you. I've had positive experiences with my Anon meeting group, but it only took me 1 time at a different night to realize that one wasn't the night for me.
    "I feel like my world was classier before I found cyclocross."
    - Mandi M.

  5. #5
    Senior Member goldfinch's Avatar
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    I have been traveling a lot in the last couple of weeks and gained three pounds! It is amazing how fast it can come back. I've thought about finding some online weight loss group as I am not in a good place for meetings. Weight Watchers has that whole point thing that I am not sure I want to learn, but maybe. If wonder if OA structured like AA? I am not really sure that I can go for that kind of structure.

    Good luck dC. No need to beat yourself up. Remember that we are fighting biology and there will be battles. Let us know if you find a group that works well for you.

  6. #6
    Member mileslong's Avatar
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    not starting over, moving on

    I wonder if you have ever given any thought as to why you won't allow yourself to succeed? You obviously have the passion for cycling, the willpower to stay on track long enough to see progress, and the ability to recognize self defeating behavior: so why do you sabotage yourself? Is there a flaw in your belief system that makes you think you don't deserve to feel good about yourself and your body? I only ask because it is something I have struggled with for years.

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    Fat Guy Rolling dcrowell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mileslong View Post
    I wonder if you have ever given any thought as to why you won't allow yourself to succeed? You obviously have the passion for cycling, the willpower to stay on track long enough to see progress, and the ability to recognize self defeating behavior: so why do you sabotage yourself? Is there a flaw in your belief system that makes you think you don't deserve to feel good about yourself and your body? I only ask because it is something I have struggled with for years.
    Those are great questions. I don't have answers. I know I've been through a lot of unrelated stuff since I started this journey four years ago. Some of it good, some of it not.
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  8. #8
    Senior Member skilsaw's Avatar
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    Good of you to recognize the problem and address it at this stage rather than wait until things were worse.
    You know what to do, and you have had success at it before.

    We're cheering for you.
    The one who has the most bikes wins.

  9. #9
    Senior Member goldfinch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mileslong View Post
    I wonder if you have ever given any thought as to why you won't allow yourself to succeed? You obviously have the passion for cycling, the willpower to stay on track long enough to see progress, and the ability to recognize self defeating behavior: so why do you sabotage yourself? Is there a flaw in your belief system that makes you think you don't deserve to feel good about yourself and your body? I only ask because it is something I have struggled with for years.
    Sorry, but this is a bit too Oprahesque for me. Why does he need to have any flaws in his belief system? How do we know he doesn't want to succeed? Just because something goes wrong doesn't mean that deep down inside we wanted it to go wrong. There are other factors and possibilities. For example, after losing weight our metabolism is now lower as we have less body to support. Our appetite hormones may have taken a beating, driving us to want to eat the amount we used to eat. It takes a effort to not eat too much. We have to exercise more than people who were never overweight to maintain the weight loss. Life intervenes and we might have events that stress us out, lowering our ability to resist temptation. We have to decide this, we have to decide that, and we run out of oomph to decide not to eat. Biology (coupled with ease of access) pushes us to eat and we end up eating just a bit too much. Suddenly we have 2, 10, 20 extra pounds. This doesn't mean that we sabotaged ourselves, it just might mean that maintaining weight loss is really hard work for some of us. The key seems to be catching the slips early.

    What is important is that dcrowell has caught himself. I see no good reason to beat ourselves up for what clearly is a difficult task--maintaining weight loss. Instead, all we can do is get back on the wagon and realize that for many or most the battle never ends.
    Last edited by goldfinch; 11-21-11 at 06:49 PM.

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    Kind of in the same boat here and checking out OA and it seems a little like AA. Talking about 12 steps and 12 traditions but I hope its not to much like AA since AA has I think it was 5% success rate or something like that? Anyways back on topic going to read more about it and maybe go check out a meeting soon.

  11. #11
    Senior Member longbeachgary's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcrowell View Post
    I was very happy when I lost 100lbs. I've slowly gained back 30.

    I've been eating poorly for 18 months now. I quit tracking what I eat. I have an unhealthy relationship with food.

    I rode 70 miles yesterday, but I stopped for pizza mid-ride and ate the whole thing. I can't ride enough miles to make up for my eating habits.

    I dropped below 200 lbs briefly in March 2010, so I've giving myself until March of 2012 to get there again. I intend to get down to 175 by September 2010.

    I'll start tracking everything I eat again. I'm going easy on breads/sugars/carbs/grains, and sadly, cutting my beer consumption.

    I know many of us here have been through this. I'm mainly just venting and being angry at myself.
    Dude, don't beat yourself up. You messed up but it's over. Start again tomorrow.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Ursa Minor's Avatar
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    I went to Overeaters Anon for many years and it helped me stay on track with my weight (stayed in the range 180-220 for 5 years or so
    with lots of biking). I quit going because I split up with my gf who also went to OA. Then I gained a lot of weight got up to 352.
    In the last 6 months I have lost 79 pounds (273) and changed my eating by portion control and eating only healthy non processed food.
    The weight has come off easily and the changes are actually enjoyable enough to be permanent (I hope). I've been thinking of going back to OA.
    Grimly determined to have fun.

  13. #13
    Senior Member goldfinch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ursa Minor View Post
    I went to Overeaters Anon for many years and it helped me stay on track with my weight (stayed in the range 180-220 for 5 years or so
    with lots of biking). I quit going because I split up with my gf who also went to OA. Then I gained a lot of weight got up to 352.
    In the last 6 months I have lost 79 pounds (273) and changed my eating by portion control and eating only healthy non processed food.
    The weight has come off easily and the changes are actually enjoyable enough to be permanent (I hope). I've been thinking of going back to OA.
    Can you tell us more what the program is like? Is there any of that "higher power" stuff?

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    yes, there is higher power stuff.... reliance on God. They say it is higher power but the one I went to and what I read said God.

    Nothing wrong with that just not for everyone.

  15. #15
    Senior Member goldfinch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chefisaac View Post
    yes, there is higher power stuff.... reliance on God. They say it is higher power but the one I went to and what I read said God.

    Nothing wrong with that just not for everyone.
    Thanks.

  16. #16
    Fat Guy Rolling dcrowell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chefisaac View Post
    yes, there is higher power stuff.... reliance on God. They say it is higher power but the one I went to and what I read said God.

    Nothing wrong with that just not for everyone.
    I noticed the ones here are mostly at churches. Hmm... I'm not really the religious type, but I'll give it a shot anyway.

    I blogged a bit more about this, and what I intend to do.
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    Senior Member magohn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mileslong View Post
    I wonder if you have ever given any thought as to why you won't allow yourself to succeed? You obviously have the passion for cycling, the willpower to stay on track long enough to see progress, and the ability to recognize self defeating behavior: so why do you sabotage yourself? Is there a flaw in your belief system that makes you think you don't deserve to feel good about yourself and your body? I only ask because it is something I have struggled with for years.
    Personally, my "inner issues" dont go as deep as that. Im closing in on 50, my metabloism took a dive in my 30's, I enjoy food and love life. Ive never been happier with myself and dont believe anybody is better than I am. I just got older and eat too much - pure and simple.


    Sometimes life really is this simple - no hidden issues - nature happens.


    Good luck OP

  18. #18
    Banned. Mr. Beanz's Avatar
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  19. #19
    Neil_B
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcrowell View Post
    I was very happy when I lost 100lbs. I've slowly gained back 30.

    I've been eating poorly for 18 months now. I quit tracking what I eat. I have an unhealthy relationship with food.

    I rode 70 miles yesterday, but I stopped for pizza mid-ride and ate the whole thing. I can't ride enough miles to make up for my eating habits.

    I dropped below 200 lbs briefly in March 2010, so I've giving myself until March of 2012 to get there again. I intend to get down to 175 by September 2010.

    I'll start tracking everything I eat again. I'm going easy on breads/sugars/carbs/grains, and sadly, cutting my beer consumption.

    I know many of us here have been through this. I'm mainly just venting and being angry at myself.
    I think you are being too hard on yourself. Weight loss is the easy part. Maintaining is hard. You've not had practice doing it. Now you are getting it.

    Besides, if I recall correctly, you've been through some major stress over the past year. That hasn't helped.

    So, now that you are getting refocused, just "do do do what you done done done before."

  20. #20
    Senior Member goldfinch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcrowell View Post
    I noticed the ones here are mostly at churches. Hmm... I'm not really the religious type, but I'll give it a shot anyway.

    I blogged a bit more about this, and what I intend to do.
    Good plan! Let us know how OA goes.

  21. #21
    LBKA punkncat's Avatar
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    Have you considered trying to cut the beer?
    Eating is one thing, and certainly should be controlled and watched, but beer...whole other thing. Liquid bread, super high in calories, sugars and really bad for your "gut watch".
    One Foot Less

  22. #22
    Fat Guy Rolling dcrowell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neil_B View Post
    I think you are being too hard on yourself. Weight loss is the easy part. Maintaining is hard. You've not had practice doing it. Now you are getting it.

    Besides, if I recall correctly, you've been through some major stress over the past year. That hasn't helped.

    So, now that you are getting refocused, just "do do do what you done done done before."
    I have had a stressful year with personal and health issues. I've also rode my bike a TON of miles.

    Maintaining is hard, but I never did make it below about 197. I didn't reach my goal weight. I do have a much different lifestyle now than I did 18 months ago. If I can get the intake issues sorted I'll make progress again.

    Quote Originally Posted by punkncat View Post
    Have you considered trying to cut the beer?
    Eating is one thing, and certainly should be controlled and watched, but beer...whole other thing. Liquid bread, super high in calories, sugars and really bad for your "gut watch".
    I am drastically reducing it. I'm not going to give up certain things. Coffee (black), good beer (on occasion), and even pizza every once-in-a-great while. It's just a matter of frequency and portion size. If I give up consuming everything I like, I'd be miserable. Certain things I gave up and don't miss: soda, candy, etc.
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  23. #23
    LBKA punkncat's Avatar
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    Just mentioned it to help you keep it in mind. We have to live a BIT, ya know?
    One Foot Less

  24. #24
    Neil_B
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcrowell View Post
    I have had a stressful year with personal and health issues. I've also rode my bike a TON of miles.

    Maintaining is hard, but I never did make it below about 197. I didn't reach my goal weight. I do have a much different lifestyle now than I did 18 months ago. If I can get the intake issues sorted I'll make progress again.
    Goal is just a number. Don't get hung up on it.

    Also, as I and other people point out, the bike isn't a magic pill for weight loss.

    And have you told yourself how awesome you are today? If not, let me do it: I think you are pretty awesome.

  25. #25
    Senior Member Ursa Minor's Avatar
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    I forgot to mention beer in my post. I used to drink 10 beers a day. when my blood sugar measured high (160-190)
    for three days running I changed my diet to eliminate carbs and to use portion control but kept drinking. The bloodsugar improved a little
    like 145-180 but not emough so I had to quit drinking. after that I saw a huge improvement 120-130 and the weight came flying off.

    Also about overeaters anon I'm not religous I just ignored that part of the program.

    Good luck I know you can do it cuase you are worth it.

    Charlie
    Grimly determined to have fun.

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