Mike552

Well I've been using my Gunnar Roadie to commute to school 3 days a week. Out of my bikes, it's actually the most "low-key". For a high-end bike, its blue color and 32h dura ace wheels make it look like a regular department store bike from far away... which is fine because I'm not big on flash. Today, as I was locking up my bike, someone stops and says "Hey, nice dura ace" or something to that effect. I know this guy he's in my class, but it got me thinking that other people are also looking at my bike. So I'm going to stop riding the Gunnar to school and I've decided to uglify my Panasonic. SOME OF YOU MAY THINK SHE'S ALREADY UGLY!!! This is mostly because it's a recent build that although it rides amazing, I never took a liking to the way it turned out aesthetically. So I'm going to paint the frame either flat black or primer rust, and I'll see how she turns out as I build her up. My mission here is to build a bike that is a pleasure to ride, low key and will not get stolen. I briefly considered buying a total beater, but my rides are kinda long and I really want something that I'll enjoy riding. If it helps any, I will be putting full fenders on her. Here's a pic of her now: So what do you guys think flat black or primer rust (or other)?

bikingshearer 

First, anyone who knows anything about road bikes will know that this is a pretty decent machine with those components, so you are probably doomed to less-than-total success in converting your ride into a stealth bike.

Having said that, if there are any hard-core bike messengers near you, check out their machines. Some of those folks have killer rides camoflaged about as well as you could possibly want, at least in San Francisco. Bumper stickers and/or electrical or duct tape seem to feature prominently in many a camo job, and can allow you express yourself even more uniquely than a bad rattle-can paint job will.

kilobytes1986

nice bike! Unless you start sticking fake poop on it I don't think it will be any less crook attracting..

KnhoJ

Paint the frame the pinkest pink you can find, with white flowers and purple accents. Think My Little Pony, Strawberry Shortcake, or maybe even Wonder Woman. Save the rust paint for the drivetrain and spokes. That'll cover the full range of thieves; anyone who's not afraid to ride off on rusty things that look like they'll fall apart and kill you will be way too manly to be seen stealing a princess bike.

ax0n

I was going to say camouflage rattlecan job and bumper stickers but someone beat me to it. I like it as is, it's a looker, actually. I'd hate to see you beat it with an ugly stick, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

Air

Take a hammer to the top tube - no one would want it afterwards! Old tubes wrapped around the frame. Break a few spokes. Loosen up the headset so the bearings are showing. Cock the handlebar to one side. Cut half the seat away.

I've actually seen a few delivery guys riding bikes with some or all of the above. Never saw them lock up the bikes outside the restaurants and no one ever glanced at them a second time...

But yeah - you do have a nice bike there. Why not get a beater? People steal stuff regardless of what it seems to be worth - they steal it because it happens to be easier to steal then the bikes around it!

Mike552

Thanks. Yeah, the stickers and tape are a great idea. I should've mentioned that I'm going to swap out the Ksyriums for a 32h 105/Mavic MA3 (front), and if keeping with the campagnolo ergo shifters (thief magnets???) I will be using a Shimano 600 rear hub laced to a Campagnolo Omega wheel with a 105 9spd cassette. OR, I can go DT lightaction shifters with a NOS sanshin/araya 36h wheel with 6 speed cassette. Suggestions??

Thanks man.

That's awesome! Unfortunately, I think you've got it wrong... one would have to be real tough not to care about riding a "princess" bike. I'm not that tough. Good idea though, seriously.

Thanks, really. I know I hate to uglify her but I was going to paint the frame over eventually anyway. So I figured that while I'm at school (the next 2 years), I'll give her a *****ty paintjob. It's just temporary and I'll still take good care of the frame. So I don't feel so bad.

So should I rattlecan it in flat black with some bumper stickers?
Also, another problem is the Truvativ compact crank... it's flashy. I'd like to uglify it without causing permanent damage. I wonder if there's anything I can use to cause that effect. Some temporary paint maybe?

ax0n

I second the beater suggestion. This time of year, the shops usually have a pretty good influx of used bikes - most of them do pretty good for the price. You could probably spend a lot less on a 90's road bike, and hell, it might already be pretty fugly. I know some of the used road bikes I saw this week
would definitely not be a target, and the one I test-rode was a great bike.

Cyclaholic

I vote for getting a 20 - 30 yr old beater. That bike is too nice to uglify.

muteseh

get shimano sora altus or tiagra decals

seriouslysilly

+1

Mariner Fan

Please don't change that bike. She's a beauty. Get a beater or a really good lock.

squeakywheel

Just buy a $20 garage sale bike to chain up at school.

slvoid

Make it pink with a few clumps of brown on it and a big sticker that says "I suck ****". No one will want to touch it.

CBBaron

First you should get a good lock and always properly lock the bike to something secure.
In addition to the frame you really need to remove/cover all of the brand decals on the components. Cheap bikes may have flashy paint jobs but will usually have unnamed components.
Also without a few dings even flat black will appear new. A bad multicolor paint job with stickers may hide that some without damaging the frame and components.
Your first line of defense should be a good lock to make theft difficult, the uglyification should be just icing.
Good luck
Craig

Bekologist

I would have kept the panasonic decals- maybe you shouldn't use so much Bike Lust frame polish.

I'd stop worrying so much about the pairings of the gruppo; anything with Campy or Mavic hoops and an immaculate drivetrain will attract glances from bike afficinados and probably bike thieves as well.

Get another beater Panasonic or something equally decrepit and just keep the drivetrain tuned and cleaned and the wheels in true. you'll be fine.

innertubes wrapped around a bike protect as well as fuglify. newsboy wire baskets in the back camoflage the drivetrain somewhat, give a bike a ghetto look and are practical as well.

ollo_ollo

Red Oxide primer the frame, then use some old skinny road tubes for bar tape & also wrap the top tube in old tubes(cut the stems off 1st). The more patches on the tubes the better! Get the wheels, derailleurs, crankset & brakes covered with dirty road grime as quickly as you can.

* jack *

two words: Duct Tape.

aadhils

Use a painbrush and paint your bike black. And do it sloppily. Then do the same for the wheels with pink paint.

Using regular house paint would be better. Then you can spray the whole frame with clearcoat. Makes a nice looking beater...

CliftonGK1

Ditch the snazzy hoops and get something low-key. You can put all the duct tape, stickers, etc. on that whip to ugly up the frame, but those rims are just screaming "high price components!" Touring rims with the branding stickers pulled off should do the trick.
My favourite move is unbranding or re-branding components. Sand off or peel off stickers and such from high end components like derailleurs, brifters, brakes, etc. Leave 'em blank, or talk to the gang at your LBS about getting some low-end gruppo stickers to put in their place.
I rode a fairly new (at the time) Stumpjumper team issue all through college and it never got messed with because I kept it locked properly and I stickered the heck out of the frame and unbranded the components. It looked like any other Salvation Army beater on campus.

Treespeed

If you don't want to paint the frame to uglify it you could wrap it in cotton bar tape. A lighter color collects dirt like crazy, but won't hurt the frame at all. I would also get something to gum up the outside of that crankset, maybe take some duct table on and off so it leaves some residue and takes off some of the shine that you can polish back later. Then I would leave a couple of good locks at the rack. I use 3 at the college where I work, though my bike is nowhere near as shiny as yours.

turbominnow

Well that stem is a step in the right direction! Add some fenders and a handlebat bag. That usually does the trick.

Ricardo

Duct tape, masking tape and electrical tape will kill any appeal it might have.

Ricardo

tsl

So what makes you think the "nice dura ace" guy meant, "I'm going to thieve your bike"? When I see someone with a nice rig, I complement them on it too. I can't count the number of times at work where people have told me the same. I take it as intended, even though my commuter rig is a hybrid with Alivio and grip shifts.

That said, I work at an inner city library branch where most of the other bikes fall into either the trash bike or X-Mart MTB category. Interestingly, it's exactly those kinds of bikes that are stolen most often. A few patrons ride roadies and in good shape, and they've never been touched on the rack.

My point here is that--ultra high-end bling bikes excepted--theives interested only in a ride will take what they're familiar with--trash bikes or MTBs. Thieves looking to resell will take what the market wants to buy--MTBs. At least around here, making your bike look like a trash bike would be a big mistake.

Your situation may be different, but it's worth looking at it from the thieve's perspective, rather than the bike geek perspective.

BTW, that's a nice rig. Dura Ace too.

jyossarian

I'll trade you my CXP-21s for the Ksyriums. Electrical tape everything that has a decal on it.