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Old 09-25-07, 06:28 PM   #1
DataJunkie
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Ever think you should have just stayed home?

Alternate thread titles:
DJ looses it....again.
How one can tell if you have not had a day off in 2.5 weeks and working in excess of 70 hrs a week.
DJ has to have that conversation with his kid. Not that one. THAT ONE!
Why I hate the burbs.

--------------------------------
Let me preface this with I am not an ambassador for cycling or a role model for anyone besides my son.
Though I did not particularly fill that role well today.
I do not care if anyone approves or disapproves my actions. They happened. End of story.
I merely want to vent.

After another 10 hr day working at home I stuck the trail-a-bike onto my touring bike and picked up my 4 year old son.
All in all we had a wonderful ride chatting up a storm..... that is until we reached our horrid suburb. Completely cycling unfriendly.
Anyways.... while riding with my son I average very low speeds and along a very busy street we take to the MUP \ sidewalk.

Here I am ready to slowly cross an intersection. Every car sees me and pulls directly into the cross walk blocking the ramp up to the other side. When it is clear I slowly cross the sidewalk and low and behold this .....woman cuts me off. Then starts yelling that she sees my son on the back and we should go around. Meanwhile I am trying to explain that I can not go around. The trail-a-bike makes my bike virtually unstable. Plus, the sidewalks have vertical gutters. After a few more seconds of arguing with her I lost it. Told my son to get off the bike and let loose a few f bombs and middle fingers while moving the bike onto the sidewalk. Meanwhile a man in a F150 behind her starts yelling at me. Not that I can hear him. While swearing profusely my son and I are finally across the crosswalk on the other sidewalk. F150 man pulls up cursing and what do I do you ask? I let loose a string of F Us unheard of. Maybe 15 of them in 10-20 secs. Said jerk off then tells me to meet him at the next parking lot. Well screamed it.
Big man challenging a father with his son to a fight.
Consequently, I pulled out my cell phone and said bag of lard hightailed it out of there after I said the word police.
During this whole thing my son was laughing and then confused when I refused to move after it had finished. I needed to take a few minutes to calm down. Once we arrived at the supermarket I had that talk with him. Something to the effect that daddy lost control and do not repeat the words you just heard.
The only thing I regret is that my son witnessed my tirade. Strangely enough I feel the best I have felt in the last few weeks. What an odd way to relieve stress.


I seriously did not intend for this post to be this long winded but whatever. I feel better. Time to make pancakes for dinner. Yummy.

Flame away.
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Old 09-25-07, 07:49 PM   #2
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**** you for ****ing cussing you ********.

Well played. Except for the kid part. But he's probably already hearing that stuff in school anyways. Well, maybe. I knew some good colorful words by the time I was 4.
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Old 09-25-07, 07:53 PM   #3
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sometimes you just got to let it out.
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Old 09-25-07, 07:59 PM   #4
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Here I am ready to slowly cross an intersection. Every car sees me and pulls directly into the cross walk blocking the ramp up to the other side. When it is clear I slowly cross the sidewalk and low and behold this .....
Colorado law in July 2005 gave bikes the right of way in crosswalks. If you got hit, they'd be at fault. I know that's not comforting, just saying.

As for the actions of the cagers, unacceptable. People should ALWAYS yield to children. Failure to do that makes you a commie ******* you cold hearted, cold war scumbag hater of freedom.
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Old 09-25-07, 08:14 PM   #5
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Hey, stuff happens and we're all imperfect people. Vent away.
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Old 09-25-07, 09:30 PM   #6
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DataJunkie, if it's any consolation, you should have heard the string of profanities my wife let out at the idiot who ran a red light and nearly drove through us while we're crossing an intersection this afternoon.


Ah, it does a heart good.
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Old 09-25-07, 09:46 PM   #7
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Having not had a day off in 2.5 weeks as well, I completely understand. Hope you can rest soon!
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Old 09-25-07, 10:29 PM   #8
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As I understand it, I apparently came home from kindergarten with all sorts of interesting new words to use. I doubt your son is permanently scarred and I'm thankful you're both OK.
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Old 09-25-07, 10:56 PM   #9
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Hey, better to let fly with a few swears than some other ways of venting your frustration.
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Old 09-26-07, 07:07 AM   #10
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Thanks everyone.

My wife shrugged it off as well. Being married for 11 years she is quite familiar with my temper. At least it only explodes once or twice a year.
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Old 09-26-07, 07:24 AM   #11
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I know how you feel. I let loose once or twice with my son with me and I always regret it but, I honestly think it affect us more than them. Recently I tried to jar his memory of when I let go of a little tirade and, he had no recollection of it.
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Old 09-26-07, 07:31 AM   #12
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When my daughter was about 3-years-old and learning to talk, we heard her muttering something while we were driving in the car. It seems that every time we came to a red light, she would say "Oh goddamit!" I don't know where she picked that up ...
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Old 09-26-07, 07:54 AM   #13
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I think you did a good thing when you stopped at the store and talked to your son about you losing control. Yes you yelled and cursed, but you didn't resort to physical violence. And it is good for children to see their parents as real people, with good and bad points.

Riding a bike with your kids is about as good as it gets.
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Old 09-26-07, 08:33 AM   #14
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The conversations we have while riding are the highlight of my day.
However, he has started yelling at me to go faster. I wonder where he got that from?
I usually find a safe area and tell him to pedal with me. We made it up to 25 mph briefly and he was having a blast.

The one lasting set of confusion I have from this is F150 guy. Why would anyone in their right mind try to fight a father with his young child? I just do not get it.
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Old 09-26-07, 09:04 AM   #15
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The one lasting set of confusion I have from this is F150 guy. Why would anyone in their right mind try to fight a father with his young child? I just do not get it.
For the same reason that I've been challenged by father/son teams; "Me 'n' my boy gon mess you up iffern ya don't move."
Sheer idiocy. It may not be totally genetically heritable, but it certainly is learned well.
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Old 09-26-07, 09:29 AM   #16
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No.
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Old 09-26-07, 09:47 AM   #17
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One response that I've thought of using in a situation such as you describe is, "Act your age." I wonder if it would work better or worse than cursing. I have to say, though, that I've only been in something close to that situation once, with an assclown in a plumbing van who jumped out of his (stopped) lane into my (empty) lane without signaling or warning, and then got seriously irate at my, "Hey!" "**** you, get the **** outta the way,", etc. I just rode away and didn't say anything to him. I don't think "Act your age" would have worked at all with this guy, who clearly had more issues than National Geographic, but with the average supposedly respectable image-conscious suburbanite, I wonder if it would be more successful.

Sounds like a good talk you had with your son, btw.
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Old 09-26-07, 09:56 AM   #18
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I feel compelled to share a few things.

First: the FR of Colorado has been named road rage capital of the world several years in a row. I thought everywhere was bad until I grew up and lived other places...Colorado Springs seems to be the epicenter of rage, El Paso County even having the #1 suicide rate for several years in the 90s (don't know about now). After just moving back, I still can't believe how terrible it is on the roads here. Nowhere else, I mean nowhere else in the world I've been is it this bad. Remember the Air Force kid who was shot on I-25 by a rather sensible seeming family man after an on-road altercation? Yeah, bad news.

Second: My dad is the champion of blowing up in front of his kids. I actually did see him fight once, luckily I was in college. He was an all-american football and baseball player, so he's not one to piss of, but he has that Irish/Scottish rage and his fuse is incredibly short. We were at a CU football game and a guy behind him shoved into him trying to get through the line. He, already in a bad mood, turned around and said, pursed lips and red face "We're all trying to get through, buddy." This guy said something to the effect of "Well, then ****in' move it!" A torrent of cursing followed when the guy pushed my dad and without hesitation he clocked the guy. Before the guy could recover he covered him with five or six more. The guy fell back into the line, semi-conscious, and my dad grabbed me and we scooted before anyone could get the police. It was bad.

I've seen him blow up and curse in traffic like his head was going to explode...he will follow a guy, tailgating him by inches and honking just to let them know how stupid they are.

I always thought it would be really bad if he had a gun.

So, rest assured you aren't the most insane dad in the world. Not that I agree with my father's actions, but yours I think were warranted. I can't stand the majority of people in cars, especially being a commuter. and I don't hope for improvement, either...

BTW, which 'burb was it?
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Old 09-26-07, 10:00 AM   #19
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seems perfectly normal to me. Props on riding with your sun. Props on dealing with the drivers. Props on not getting in a fight with burley guy.

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Old 09-26-07, 10:15 AM   #20
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BTW, which 'burb was it?
Thornton. Yay....

I would never have moved to this particular town if I had know what cycling issues I would eventually have.
bleh...

It is pretty and all but the motorists are complete twits.
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Old 09-26-07, 11:12 AM   #21
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...Colorado Springs seems to be the epicenter of rage...
Ironic considering they're the epicenter of Family Values.
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Old 09-26-07, 11:51 AM   #22
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DJ, I think you weren't exactly 'right' there, but the main thing is you admitted your faults/actions and explained them to the one(s) who matter - your son, and your wife. That's what makes a difference too I think. Everyone blows up, it happens - and frankly, I don't blame you.

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So, rest assured you aren't the most insane dad in the world. Not that I agree with my father's actions, but yours I think were warranted. I can't stand the majority of people in cars, especially being a commuter. and I don't hope for improvement, either...
Are we brothers, perhaps? My Dad blows up almost everytime when in the car - luckily for me he's across the Atlantic ocean from me now - but I've never witnessed him fight, he'll surely speak his mind when people do stupid **** on the road - he's a pretty decent/safe driver himself. My Dad just has or had anger management issues, they're not physical, only verbal, but still... Sometimes made for an interesting evening at home
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Old 09-26-07, 12:49 PM   #23
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We were at a CU football game and a guy behind him shoved into him trying to get through the line. He, already in a bad mood
I can see why, if he a)paid money and was b)waiting in line to watch the Buffs play.
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