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Old 04-15-08, 11:48 PM   #1
MrCjolsen
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Vroom! Vroom! Vrooooooom! Screeeeech! Whirrrrrr Whirrrrrr

OK, maybe my onomatopoetic skills are not what they used to be, but this made my day.

I'm sitting at a stoplight, waiting to turn left. To my right is a big assed monster truck Ford F-75000 or whatever, with big assed tires and what turned out to be a big ass driving it.

I hear the sound of a loudly revving engine, followed by the screech of tires. Your basic "peel out right turn" maneuver. Then I hear sirens.

As it turns out, the moron driving the truck did this right in front of a cop! I loudly cheered as he got pulled over.

Then I realized that the reason this idiot didn't see the cop is because his ****** deathmobile was too high and the cop was basicaly under his line of sight.

It was great to see instant justice for that type of obnoxious behavior we so often have to put up with.
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Old 04-16-08, 12:07 AM   #2
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sweet.

It always seems like the size of the monster truck is proportional to the size of the person...
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Old 04-16-08, 12:13 AM   #3
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Sorry I missed it. At least one itersection full of witnesses had a nice day.
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Old 04-16-08, 12:24 AM   #4
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It seems to me that the most agressive drivers are in big diesel pickups. They are not necessarily the most inattentive, however. That award goes to the cell phone using SUV commuter.
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Old 04-16-08, 01:17 AM   #5
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sweet.

It always seems like the size of the monster truck is proportional to the size of the person...
and inversely proportional to their manhood.
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Old 04-16-08, 01:48 AM   #6
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I had a deathmobile behind me today. I was sitting at a light ready to make an unprotected left, the death mobile behind me. I enjoyed the fact my tiny bicycle was holding up his massive truck, apparently he didn't. Before I could move to the right and let him pass he moved to the left, partially into oncoming traffic revving his engine and hammering the pedal to show that no puny biker could hold back his awesomeness.
I had to chuckle to myself a little. Too bad there were no police around, and I was only 2 blocks from the local precinct.
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Old 04-16-08, 02:23 AM   #7
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gotta love instant justice
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Old 04-16-08, 06:15 AM   #8
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great post ! haha
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Old 04-16-08, 06:44 AM   #9
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It seems to me that the most agressive drivers are in big diesel pickups. They are not necessarily the most inattentive, however. That award goes to the cell phone using SUV commuter.

I this city I find the least attentive drivers to be those in 5 and 7 series BMWs. I have had to calmly rase my voice at no less than three of them in the past two days.
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Old 04-16-08, 06:55 AM   #10
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...Ford F-75000...


Canyonero!
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Old 04-16-08, 06:55 AM   #11
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It seems to me that the most agressive drivers are in big diesel pickups. They are not necessarily the most inattentive, however. That award goes to the cell phone using SUV commuter.

I this city I find the least attentive drivers to be those in 5 and 7 series BMWs. I have had to calmly rase my voice at no less than three of them in the past two days.
Same here. Yesterday I saw a BMW have to lay rubber and veer into the oncoming lane to avoid rear-ending a car that was stopped for me while I was in the crosswalk. I've found they definitely cause problems disproportionate to their representation.

We don't have too many of the tough-guy diesel pickup around here, but when I lived in more rural areas they were a problem.
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Old 04-16-08, 06:56 AM   #12
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This has nothing to do with riding, but is a similar story. Back when I still had a car my boyfriend and I were on our was to my parents' house when we got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic that wasn't moving due to a car broken down on the highway. We were in the right hand lane right next to an on ramp for cars getting onto the highway. The guy a few cars in front of up pulled into the shoulder and the backed down the on ramp to get out of the traffic. We started talking about what a jerk the guy was when we saw some flashing lights. At the bottom of the ramp was a lighted intersection and a cop had been at the bottom waiting for the light to turn green. He pulled the guy right over. We got the biggest kick out of it!
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Old 04-16-08, 06:57 AM   #13
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Canyonero!
12 yards long and two lanes wide, 65 tons of American pride!
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Old 04-16-08, 07:02 AM   #14
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The Miabatsu Monstrosity:
"In amphibious mode, it can cross rivers."
"So what if it only gets 3 miles per gallon, I'm a mom, not a conservationist."
"One time, we lost Billy in the back, and couldn't find him for an hour."
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Old 04-16-08, 09:10 AM   #15
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and inversely proportional to their manhood.
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Old 04-16-08, 09:24 AM   #16
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Driving a Mustang, I always get people wanting to race me. The car draws way too much attention so I save it unless I'm on an on-ramp or somewhere I can get away with it. Twice I've had people peel out next to me only to get pulled over emmediately after the intersection while I mosey on by. I was with my brother once while someone was revving at us. We weren't even first at the light but the kid revved it through the roof and tried to do a burn out. To our amusement, his car couldn't peel out, it instead lurched forward 3' and rammed the car in front of him!
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Old 04-16-08, 10:00 AM   #17
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I got cut off by a guy driving an Audi S4 Avant. Nice car, bad driver. He did a no-look lane change and I had to make a panic stop/dodge or plough into a parked car. I pulled up along his left side and dragged a gloved hand along his window as I went by - no damage whatsoever. He pulled up behind me, popped his head out and we exchanged words. I should have played it cool, but I was mad. I cranked off a letter to the editor of our local paper, which makes me feel a bit better.
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Old 04-16-08, 10:14 AM   #18
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12 yards long and two lanes wide, 65 tons of American pride!
Smells like a steak and seats 35!
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Old 04-16-08, 10:30 AM   #19
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Driving a Mustang, I always get people wanting to race me. The car draws way too much attention so I save it unless I'm on an on-ramp or somewhere I can get away with it. Twice I've had people peel out next to me only to get pulled over emmediately after the intersection while I mosey on by. I was with my brother once while someone was revving at us. We weren't even first at the light but the kid revved it through the roof and tried to do a burn out. To our amusement, his car couldn't peel out, it instead lurched forward 3' and rammed the car in front of him!
I get that same isht driving my Subaru WRX, have had a few people pulled over right next to me for general jackassedness (usually riced out hondas).

Now days it sits in my carport most of the time, anybody wanna but a WRX?
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Old 04-16-08, 10:42 AM   #20
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sweet.

It always seems like the size of the monster truck is proportional to the size of the person...
Sometimes it's <inversely> proportional (the bigger the vehicle, the smaller the driver). I almost wish for a place to put a bumper sticker. Mine would say:

Yes, I ride a bicycle. What are you comepensating for?
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Old 04-16-08, 10:43 AM   #21
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Once while riding in the right lane, I had a motorist in the left lane quickly cut in front of me at high speed, and then under correct his maneuver and continue to go all the way off into the right shoulder and then back on the road, all the while never slowing down. He ran over a large hunk of metal that went flying, which immediately produced a loud psst, psst, psst, psst of air escaping from his tire! Pity I was close to my turn off so I didn't get to pass him on the side of the road!
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Old 04-16-08, 10:58 AM   #22
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and inversely proportional to their manhood.
My preferred term is making poor choices in an effort to compensate for anatomical deficiencies.
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Old 04-16-08, 11:02 AM   #23
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Big vehicles scare me because they always seem to pass too close.

But little old people who's hands are fixed at the top of the steering wheel and never seem to move their heads scare me more. Sure, they drive slow, but they don't tend to signal until the very last minute and make really unpredicatable moves like stopping or slowing down suddenly for no reason, making quick lane changes or turns.
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Old 04-16-08, 11:13 AM   #24
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Four-wheeled penis extenders.
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Old 04-16-08, 11:18 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by vtjim View Post


Canyonero!
Can you name the truck with four wheel drive,
smells like a steak and seats thirty-five..

Canyonero! Canyonero!

Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down,
It's the country-fried truck endorsed by a clown!

Canyonero! (Yah!) Canyonero!
[Krusty:] Hey Hey

The Federal Highway comission has ruled the
Canyonero unsafe for highway or city driving.

Canyonero!

12 yards long, 2 lanes wide,
65 tons of American Pride!

Canyonero! Canyonero!

Top of the line in utility sports,
Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!

Canyonero! Canyonero! (Yah!)

She blinds everybody with her super high beams,
She's a squirrel crushing, deer smacking, driving machine!

Canyonero!-oh woah, Canyonero! (Yah!)

Drive Canyonero!

Woah Canyonero!

Woah!
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