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  1. #1
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Might have to give up the bike :(

    As some know, I just recently started incorporating my bike into part of my commute for a variety of reasons, including stretching the household dollar since my wife lost her job. Good news is that she starts a new job on Monday. Bad news is that she will be required to put in massive overtime- 12 hrs a day M-F, plus another 8-10 on Sat= 68 to 70 hours per week on the clock.

    Ideally, we'd still car-pool and I'd ride my bike from her new employer to mine, since her start time isn't that much earlier than when I could start. And I'd have more than ample time to make it back to her after work for the carpool home. Or I could continue with what I'm currently doing and beat her home by roughly an hour.

    Thing is, our built-in babysitter (wife's first born) goes off to college next month. Which leaves the other three children unsupervised. Though I think that they would be okay, the wife doesn't quite trust the 14 yr old to be in charge over her siblings (9 and 6).

    This just sucks. I'm actually rather enjoying cranking out 10+miles in triple digit heat. Tired and sweaty, but somehow more at peace with my self. I kinda dig the "you rode how far?" and "don't tell me you're going to ride in the rain, are you?" comments. And a couple of the ladies broke out singing "Legs" by ZZ Top when they saw me in my (non-spandex) cycling shorts for the first time.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Grim's Avatar
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    That sucks. 14 is on the cusp though.


    School have an aftercare program? My kids school is $7 a day to 6pm. WAY cheaper then day care and they will help them with home work too boot. Maybe a couple days a week that might be an option to let you get in your ride and next year that teen with be 15.

    My Commute has been a very positive thing in my life for my health. My office is moving closer to my home in 2 months and I am pissed that I am loosing 2.5 miles of my commute. Now the good thing is the MUP that will run behind my hood will be nearing completion later this year and I can knock out a few miles on it in the evenings when it is done.
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  3. #3
    Administrator CbadRider's Avatar
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    How long will the kids be by themselves? Is there a neighbor who can check up on them, or maybe they can go to the neighbor's house?
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    So Tom only hires people that are nutty? Is part of the requirement to be a moderator on this site is that you have to be nuts??
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  4. #4
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CbadRider View Post
    How long will the kids be by themselves? Is there a neighbor who can check up on them, or maybe they can go to the neighbor's house?
    1. If I drove instead using the bike at allf, I'd be able to meet or beat the kids home 4 out of the 5 days of the week. Monday is my "long" day at work, but would still make it home within a quarter hour after the kids got home. The car/bike/bus thing that I'm doing currently would mean the kids are at home for roughly 2 hours (ideally, depending on the ever efficient transit system) before I could get home. If I carpool/bike with the wife, then it would be roughly 2.5-3 hours before we would get home.

    2. There are people who can check up on them, but they have their own lives/schedules and can't be depended upon fully all of the time. There is also 2 registered sex offenders living at the other end of the block, and a 16 yr old boy who has been stalking my 14 yr old girl.

    3. The 14 yr old is the one that I've talked about before down in the Lounge.
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  5. #5
    In the right lane gerv's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    Bad news is that she will be required to put in massive overtime- 12 hrs a day M-F, plus another 8-10 on Sat= 68 to 70 hours per week on the clock.
    If I were her, I'd start looking for another job immediately. She won't survive with those hours.

  6. #6
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    My wife is aware that she facing a "burn out" schedule.

    Apparently, the company she is going to work for acquired another company and relocated it here. There are customer contracts that have to be fulfilled, and a bunch of the acquired company's assets didn't make the move here. They are ramping up their operations for this new division, but are having trouble finding qualified candidates to fill the positions, as it's very technical. Once they catch up on the backlog and increase their manning, the O/T *should* become more manageable, if not eliminated entirely.
    Last edited by no1mad; 07-24-10 at 05:04 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
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  7. #7
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    If it's a temporary thing, I"d look for some kind of compromise, maybe ride 2-3 days a week, check in the other days, or possibly do the drive to work Monday AM, ride home Monday PM, Ride to work Tuesday AM, drive home Tuesday PM, etc. Some riding is better than none.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    ... and a 16 yr old boy who has been stalking my 14 yr old girl.
    I would make putting a stop to this my TOP Priorty, to include pressing charges on the 16 yr. old with anything that might apply, while keeping myself out of legal hot water. Might want to consult an attorney.

    The sex offenders I wouldn't worry about. So many ridiculous things require sex offender registration anymore that the term has become all but meaningless.

    After that; it sounds like the wife's extended work hours are temporary. I'd take a break from the bike until things settle down and her company gets caught up.
    The wife's OT I would look at as a benefit and be banking that smack. Especially since it looks like a temporary situation until her company gets caught up. When things settle down I'd look at that money as a nice, fat bonus and get myself a new bike and her something nice; like a new lawnmower.

    Another option is to move closer to your and your wife's work. But that may not be in the cards in your situation.
    Last edited by CommuterRun; 07-24-10 at 06:20 PM.

  9. #9
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MK313 View Post
    If it's a temporary thing, I"d look for some kind of compromise, maybe ride 2-3 days a week, check in the other days, or possibly do the drive to work Monday AM, ride home Monday PM, Ride to work Tuesday AM, drive home Tuesday PM, etc. Some riding is better than none.
    Yeah, it may come down to this. Thursdays and Fridays are my light days at work. I may end up just doing the car/bus/bike thing on those days. Bike into town from where I park my Suburban (instead of taking the bus in the morning as I'm currently doing) to catch the connecting to work, then reverse it for the ride home. I'll have to check the bus schedule, and possibly reduce my own hours at work to be able to pull it off.

    Another option would be to drive full time, but have my bike on hand to ride when I get out early enough to put in some time on the saddle. I'm not really into recreational riding, but may have to resort to it to halfway stay in shape for when/if the opportunity to use the bike for commuting purposes presents itself again. Or just take a pay cut and get a job closer to home...
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
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  10. #10
    Senior Member Kimmitt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    a 16 yr old boy who has been stalking my 14 yr old girl.
    Two of my younger sisters have dealt with similar situations, and both of them ended in sexual assault. Please consider a lawyer and a Private Investigator. This is the sort of thing which money is for.
    I see unexamined people. All the time. I don't think they know they're unexamined.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterRun View Post
    I would make putting a stop to this my TOP Priorty, to include pressing charges on the 16 yr. old with anything that might apply, while keeping myself out of legal hot water. Might want to consult an attorney.

    The sex offenders I wouldn't worry about. So many ridiculous things require sex offender registration anymore that the term has become all but meaningless.

    After that; it sounds like the wife's extended work hours are temporary. I'd take a break from the bike until things settle down and her company gets caught up.
    The wife's OT I would look at as a benefit and be banking that smack. Especially since it looks like a temporary situation until her company gets caught up. When things settle down I'd look at that money as a nice, fat bonus and get myself a new bike and her something nice; like a new lawnmower.

    Another option is to move closer to your and your wife's work. But that may not be in the cards in your situation.
    LOL, well I'm just going to take the other side of things.

    It's true that there seem to be so many things you can be labeled a sex offender for that it's hard to say what that means - the last couple stories in the media have been about teenagers sending illicit pictures of themselves to their significant other, then when the school somehow finds out being brought up on criminal charges and having to register as a "sex offender". Other apparently common cases are that a high school couple is sleeping together when he's 18 and she's 17, but her parents hate her boyfriend so when they find out they're dating they get the cops involved. Obviously these aren't really the kind of people who are going to jump someone on a street corner.

    On the other hand, sometimes sex offenders are actually very, very dangerous...so, you know, I'm not saying it's one way or the other.

    And the "stalking" comment is equally ambiguous. If this guy is genuinely stalking the girl - she doesn't want anything to do with him, she's made it clear to him that she doesn't want anything to do with him, and he still follows him around and shows up places she goes but he shouldn't be, that sounds serious.

    On the other hand, when I was in middle school and even 5th or 6th grade, girls would would say some guy was "stalking" them - really it was some guy who "liked" them. They'd say "stalking" because it was more dramatic, and after so much of that stuff girls go through about how "boys are bad and stuff", it was lot more comfortable for them to say "stalking" rather than "I think maybe I like him". Or he's just to shy and never works up the courage to talk to the girl, but isn't sure what to do (we're talking middle school here - remember middle school?). And that doesn't go into the really messed situations where her parents are super paranoid about her dating, and she lies to them about her dating life (why's that boy always seem to be around when I'm out? Uh....it's 'cause he's stalking me. I don't want him to, but he does!). Obviously that's over the top - but not so over the top that it doesn't happen regularly.

    Obviously I have no idea which end of the spectrum any these things are. Frankly, if there were 2 sex offenders living at the end of the block and someone possibly stalking my 14 year old daughter, I would assume that among all these things *something* was worth being concerned about, and worth driving to work for a couple of months (at some point the wife will either not have a lot of overtime, or the overtime will cause burnout and she'll have to quit - either way you get your time back).

  12. #12
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterRun View Post

    Another option is to move closer to your and your wife's work. But that may not be in the cards in your situation.
    It's been discussed and apparently permanently tabled. The two youngest are in the highest rated dependent school district in the state. And the suburb we are living in is actually rather bikeable, it's just that there are really no quality, high paying jobs here. That being said, we've begun to kick around the idea of me finding a new job locally, even though it will mean a pay cut.

    And to put a commuting spin on to this, I'm going to remove my rear rack and put my rear fender back on.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
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  13. #13
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PaulRivers View Post
    ... driving to work for a couple of months (at some point the wife will either not have a lot of overtime, or the overtime will cause burnout and she'll have to quit - either way you get your time back).
    Yeah, that's pretty much how we see it, too. But the combined fuel bill is going to suck...
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
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  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    It's been discussed and apparently permanently tabled. The two youngest are in the highest rated dependent school district in the state. And the suburb we are living in is actually rather bikeable, it's just that there are really no quality, high paying jobs here. That being said, we've begun to kick around the idea of me finding a new job locally, even though it will mean a pay cut.
    That's kind of what we did when I retired. We chose where we wanted to live even though there are no higher paying jobs in the immediate area, taking other considerations into account. Then took jobs locally even though we could be making significantly more somewhere else. But doing this put us closer to the recreational activities that we like to do and made owning more than one car unnecessary. By owning only one car, making cuts in other areas and I have my retirement pay and benefits, we live comfortably.

    Sometimes I do think about I could be making a lot more money; but then I think about what I would have to give up to do that.

    I suggest considering the expenses of one of your cars, subtract that from what you're making in your current job, and see how that stacks up against what you would be making in a local job. You might be able to make it work just by selling a car.

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    That's too bad about the bike, I completely empathize. Your first priority though is your children and it's not your 14 year old's responsibility to get everyone out of the house on time. I am in the same situation with you in that respect. I'm only bike commuting in the summer because my kids are out of school. Once August 24th rolls around, the commuting will pretty much wrap up since I'm the parent whose work time starts the latest. Sorry about the lecture but I don't think I'm telling you something you don't already know. I hope you can find an arrangement that works for you. Good luck to your wife with her new job, it's sounds like it's going to be a bear for a few months.

    A mom who bikes

  16. #16
    on your left.
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    and a 16 yr old boy who has been stalking my 14 yr old girl.
    I have no idea about the situation, but before you mess up this 16 year old's life with legal action like others on the forum are saying, make sure it's "stalking" and not him simply "liking" your daughter. I'm just sayin'. Also, just talk to his parents?
    Quote Originally Posted by caloso View Post
    I learned this the hard way. They say that experience is the best teacher, but I would have been preferred to just read about it on the internet.

  17. #17
    Senior Member chandltp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by no1mad View Post
    2. There are people who can check up on them, but they have their own lives/schedules and can't be depended upon fully all of the time. There is also 2 registered sex offenders living at the other end of the block, and a 16 yr old boy who has been stalking my 14 yr old girl.
    I'd like to point out that sex offender does not equal pedophile. Not saying you're making this association, but I have several people on my block that use that watchdog (or whatever it is) web site that don't understand this.
    There are 10 types of people, those that understand binary and those that don't.

  18. #18
    Senior Member rumrunn6's Avatar
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    you can always go on joy rides on the weekends. those kids are not old enough to be left alone, 14 maybe but not 6
    cycling is like baseball ~ it doesn't take much to make it interesting

  19. #19
    Senior Member chandltp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rumrunn6 View Post
    those kids are not old enough to be left alone, 14 maybe but not 6
    I was babysitting kids younger than 6 when I was 14.
    There are 10 types of people, those that understand binary and those that don't.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Kimmitt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nahh View Post
    I have no idea about the situation,
    Don't let it slow you down, big guy. I think you should continue to lecture a girl's parent on how she shoudn't be protected or supported.
    I see unexamined people. All the time. I don't think they know they're unexamined.

  21. #21
    Senior Member canyoneagle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterRun View Post
    When things settle down I'd look at that money as a nice, fat bonus and get myself a new bike and her something nice; like a new lawnmower.
    Okay, this is too hilarious to NOT put in my quote line. Do you mind if I do?

    To the OP, depending on how long the time difference would be (between riding and driving), I'd be inclined to try to make it work, even for 3 days a week.

    Hopefully your wife's new job will settle down in the near future.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimmitt View Post
    Don't let it slow you down, big guy. I think you should continue to lecture a girl's parent on how she shoudn't be protected or supported.
    I don't see what nahh said as being a lecture. no1mad asked for advice and what nahh said is pertinent to some of the background that no1mad gave. And actually what nahh said is better advice than that I gave on the same subject.



    Quote Originally Posted by canyoneagle View Post
    Okay, this is too hilarious to NOT put in my quote line. Do you mind if I do?
    Nah, go right ahead. I posted that knowing it would be funny, but a little background: what I said to no1mad earlier about me taking a lower paying job close by rather than a higher paying job further away; I do golf course maintenance on a 18 hole course with a 7 man crew counting the superintendent and the mechanic. This time of year, really anytime during the growing season, I may be on four different kinds of mowers over the course of the day. Or on a day like today I may spend a 10 hour day on a tractor mowing rough. Think I'm gonna' mow the yard when I get home?
    "You want me to mow what!!?"

    Fortunately my wife understands this, so she takes care of the yard.

    As a matter of fact I really did just order her a brand new mower yesterday. Should be in Wednesday or Thursday.

    Funny true story:
    A next door neighbor I had, since moved away, sheepishly came over one day.
    "Hey, man. It's making my wife mad that you're chipping golf balls while your wife is mowing your yard."

    Me:
    "No problem. She's mowing because she wants to. Tell your wife to not look over here if she doesn't like it."

    He went home.
    Last edited by CommuterRun; 07-26-10 at 06:49 PM.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterRun View Post
    Funny true story:
    A next door neighbor I had, since moved away, sheepishly came over one day.
    "Hey, man. It's making my wife mad that you're chipping golf balls while your wife is mowing your yard."

    Me:
    "No problem. She's mowing because she wants to. Tell your wife to not look over here if she doesn't like it."

    He went home.
    ...and then later moved away, LOL!

  24. #24
    Senior Member canyoneagle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterRun View Post
    I don't see what nahh said as being a lecture. no1mad asked for advice and what nahh said is pertinent to some of the background that no1mad gave. And actually what nahh said is better advice than that I gave on the same subject.

    Nah, go right ahead. I posted that knowing it would be funny, but a little background: what I said to no1mad earlier about me taking a lower paying job close by rather than a higher paying job further away; I do golf course maintenance on a 18 hole course with a 7 man crew counting the superintendent and the mechanic. This time of year, really anytime during the growing season, I may be on four different kinds of mowers over the course of the day. Or on a day like today I may spend a 10 hour day on a tractor mowing rough. Think I'm gonna' mow the yard when I get home?
    "You want me to mow what!!?"

    Fortunately my wife understands this, so she takes care of the yard.

    As a matter of fact I really did just order her a brand new mower yesterday. Should be in Wednesday or Thursday.

    Funny true story:
    A next door neighbor I had, since moved away, sheepishly came over one day.
    "Hey, man. It's making my wife mad that you're chipping golf balls while your wife is mowing your yard."

    Me:
    "No problem. She's mowing because she wants to. Tell your wife to not look over here if she doesn't like it."

    He went home.
    Great to know! I can totally relate. One of my wife's many aptitudes is that she's a certified Massage Therapist. When whe was working at a spa full time, there was no way in hell I would ask her for a massage.
    Currently one bike: Singular Gryphon do-it all bike with Nuvinci N360
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  25. #25
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Update- Wife O/T has already started to come down to manageable levels, only 10 hour days instead of the 12. Carpooled with her today to her employer, then rode to mine in roughly an hour. Took almost twice that to meet back up with her, but I went exploring different routes within the same corridor.

    Used the backpack today, but will try either a townie basket or saddlebag panniers tomorrow as an experiment for myself.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
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