alanf

It all started off innocently enough... I wanted a light so I got a barely perceptible one for a couple of bucks at M.E.C. .
Then I wanted to mount my heart monitor, so I wrapped some foam on the handlebar and then taped it on to hold the wristwatch heart monitor.
Then I realized that I simply could not live without putting a Shimano FlightDeck on so I could measure my cadence as the bikeshop guy said it was a good idea...
Then I needed a cordless Cateye thingy for the odo as my Flightdeck does not seem to be bothered to have this option, or at least I could not figure how to get to it. It seems to have one that has a volatile memory.
Of course I needed a mirror!
Then when I moved to the big city I needed a place to mount my Garmin Nuvi 660 and since I couldn't find a bike mount for it in the big city I had to order one online but the only place that would sell me one for a decent price was Amazon who wouldn't ship to Canada soooooo I have one coming when a relative visits us here in the big white north next month but untillllllll then I am holding my own Tupperware party.
And Last but most definitely not least I have a ringy dingy because here in Ottawa they are extremely bike friendly. There are beautiful bike trails everywhere. Girlfriend and I are still in shock at how you can go anywhere in town through awesome woods and fields on paved paths and the city streets have bike lanes in a lot of places. I noticed that they want you to put a bell on so you can warn walkers of your imminent arrival, so you don't give them a heart attack when you pass. No doubt no one would arrest you for not havin a dingaling, but hey I see their point. The city buses even have bike carriers out front.... Awesome. Way to go Ottawa. https://apps104.ottawa.ca/emap/?lang=...wa_cycling.mwf
So the bike bell had to be taped on because it wouldn't fit over the handlebar wrap.
My bike is an expensive jobbie but I suspect that the attachments have downgraded the value and thieves would probably run the other way or not be strong enough to lift it.
So in summation I think that I have the ugliest cockpit in the world. whaddyatink

Scootcore

wow.....thats alot of crap!!!

varuscelli

You know those reality shows on TV where some professional interior designer comes in and redesigns your living room or organizes your garage pimps your car or whatever?

We need one of those for bikes.

I say we start our own show, right here on BikeForums.net

Maybe we can call it "D-Ugly My Bike" or "What Not to Ride" . . .

Not that there's anything WRONG with your bike. Just needs a bit of light dusting and tidying or the like. I love it.

varuscelli

I think what you need to ease your pain might be a Nitto Lamp Holder 2:

(Granted, it might only ease some of the pain, but it might free up the main handlebar a bit...)

akatsuki

Where is the laptop stand?

Autospirit

Bicycle!.........Bicycle!

chainstrainer

Clean up that cockpit like this (GPS, bike computer, music, video and gamepad):

operator

And then sometimes you just want to ride with nothing. Clean bike, lighter bike, faster bike. No accessories, no computer. Just ride.

Possum Roadkill

For every feature you listed, other than lighting, a Garmin 705 will work, plus it has a back light, which some of your hardware lacks.

Isn't there an "Incredibell" model that is bar end mount? I'm sure I've seen one of those somewhere before.

alanf

I have an iMac and the cord would be too long. Girlfriend wouldn't lend me hers... : )

alanf

My girlfriend laughed when I told her about your idea...... Another toy.... Break it to her gently..
What'll they think of next

alanf

Hey that looks like a Harley! Do you have a closer up picture?

alanf

Really the only things that I am missing are streamers from the bar ends and those round thingys on the spokes and maybe some playing cards clothespinned to the front forks that make the slapping sound.
LOL

Hobartlemagne 

You need one of those dashboard-Jesus figures stuck to the bars

chainstrainer

... or a bobble head grass skirt hula dancer.

My friend took a vintage long-wheelbase recumbent and tricked it out with the cockpit and fairing, British Racing Green paint, yellow Vuelta wheels and a pair of English leather saddlebags.