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What I learned on my birthday...

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What I learned on my birthday...

Old 10-20-06, 11:46 PM
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I need more cowbell.
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What I learned on my birthday...

1. Don’t get an eye infection.

2. If you do get an eye infection, don’t get one when your eye doctor is on vacation.

3. If you do get an eye infection when your eye doctor is on vacation, don’t expect the substitute eye doctor’s office manager to care about you, beyond what insurance you carry.

4. If you do get an eye infection when your eye doctor is on vacation, and you don’t expect the substitute eye doctor’s office manager to care about you beyond what insurance you carry, don’t expect to be seen at the time she has you come in.

5. If you do get an eye infection when your eye doctor is on vacation, and you don’t expect the substitute eye doctor’s office manager to care about you beyond what insurance you carry, and you don’t expect to be seen at the time she has you come in, don’t be surprised when the substitute eye doctor writes you a prescription for four kinds of medication, one of which you already have.

6. If the substitute eye doctor writes such a prescription, don’t expect the substitute eye doctor to remember that you already have on hand one of the medications and therefore don’t need to purchase it.

7. If you don't realize that the substitute eye doctor is including the one medication you already have on the prescription order until after you get back from the pharmacy, don't expect that one medication you already have, and therefore didn't need to buy, to be affordable. (That is, unless you consider $52 for a tenth of an ounce of drops to be affordable.)

8. If you do get an eye infection, and start putting drops in your eye, and wearing glasses you’re not used to, don’t decide it’s a good time to do routine beard maintenance.

9. If you do decide to do some routine beard maintenance, don’t do it while wearing glasses you’re not used to, not to mention a patch, unless you want to use the wrong attachment and trim it all the way to the skin with your first pass.

10. If you do decide to do some routine beard maintenance wearing glasses you’re not used to, not to mention a patch, because you decided to have an eye infection when your eye doctor was on vacation, and you saw a substitute eye doctor whose office manager cared only about your insurance and made you wait an extra 45 minutes for an appointment, only to have said substitute give you a prescription for four medications, one of which you didn't need to buy but didn't realize and so therefore you spent $52 for it, putting you in a foul mood when the idea of trimming your beard comes up in the first place, and you use the wrong attachment and trim a portion of it all the way to the skin with your first pass, maybe you’d better decide you really only wanted a mustache after all.

I'm just saying...
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Old 10-21-06, 01:12 AM
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You did the facial hair poll too early. Oh, well it'll grow back. Of course Sigmund Freud might suggest that the moment you did the poll, you had already made the decision to remove the beard. I'm just saying....
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Old 10-21-06, 02:30 AM
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Time for a change.
 
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So what you are saying- is don't get an eye infection, and if you do- Don't do any thing. Would I be OK if I rode my bike?
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Old 10-21-06, 03:36 AM
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All well and good, DG, but no mention of your obligatory age-in-miles ride.

I smell a lazy rat lurking beneath your fanciful tale of woe!
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Old 10-21-06, 05:44 AM
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I didn't need to read that this morning, DG, today's my birthday. I'm planning on taking the whole weekend to celebrate. Had dinner and desert (not pie) with some tandeming friends last night. Scheduled lunch with my sister today. I'm kind'a thinking that if I just ride my age that might not be enough to work off the extra calories. Oh well!
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