Now that I'm retired
The other day I went to Starbucks for coffee and I was only in there for about 5 minutes. When I came out there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I went up to him and said, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break"? He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I upped the ante and called him a "Nazi." He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a "doughnut-eating Gestapo jerk." He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, I didn't care. I rode to Starbucks on my bicycle. The car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Hillary in '08." I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. My doctors tell me it is important to laugh.
Borrowed from the touring-request phred.