Advertise on Bikeforums.net



User Tag List

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 30
  1. #1
    Let's do a Century jppe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    North Carolina
    My Bikes
    Pinarello Prince/Campy SR; Cervelo R3/Sram Red; Trek 5900/Duraace, Cervelo P2C/Duraace
    Posts
    5,984
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    It really hurts to see someone hurting

    I just need to talk............

    I've been trying to visit my cycling buddy in the hospital who was hit by a car as much as I possibly can. We're getting a pretty good network of neighbors, cyclists and others to pitch in as needed. Right now there is not a lot anyone can do but that will certainly change once he is able to come home. However that might be several more weeks.

    I'm just crushed when I go visit him. It just tears me up to see the guy writhing in pain. Here's a fellow who was as strong and healthy a 60 year old as you could imagine. Here's a cyclist with outstanding cycling skills-in fact he qualified for Senior Nationals in 2009. He could have qualified for more events but sat out one event to let another local friend qualify. We've "Assaulted Mt Mitchell" together and we've chased each other up hill after hill. We've both smiled at each other as we've dropped younger riders along the way. We've enjoyed pushing each other to knowing the pain we've experienced in riding and training just made us a little better.

    Tonight I spent a couple hours with him-a lot of it just sitting in the dark watching him rest-and occasionally writhe in pain. Here was this guy that just a week ago was as strong as they get looking weak and helpless. It felt so easy to put myself in his position and feel the pain he was feeling.

    A million thoughts ran through my head.

    As much as I enjoy the many aspects of riding that we all have shared stories about, I was asking myself if it was really worth it-is it worth the risk. I now wonder what my mindset will be the next time I go riding. Will I be so concerned about vehicles and safety I become a threat to myself or other riders-or worry so much I lose a lot of the enjoyment??? I'll work through all that but it's bothering me more than I would have guessed.

    The other thing that really dawned on me tonight --- he as a long, long way to recovery--and it's going to be very, very difficult. The doctors are now estimating he'll be in the hospital even longer. They won't even be able to operate on his leg/knee for at least another couple weeks........I think he is doing great handling all this-but man does he have a long way to go.

    It sure does hurt in more ways than I can explain seeing him hurt.

    Thanks for letting me share!

    Stay safe!!

  2. #2
    Small Member maddmaxx's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    My Bikes
    Leader home built hardtail, Diamondback Response
    Posts
    7,071
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Share anytime Jppe. We will all help as much as we can.

  3. #3
    Ride Daddy Ride Jet Travis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Villa Incognito
    My Bikes
    1983 Trek 720; 1983 Trek 620; 1989 Gi Cannondale Bad Boy Ultra; LeMond Victoire; Bike Friday Pocket Rocket Pro
    Posts
    2,648
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    In the midst of the most difficult times, we can remind ourselves at the amazing ability of human beings to either fully recover or to build something new and good out of seeming tragedy. Remember, jppe, when you ride with this group, you never ride alone.
    "Light it up, Popo." --Levi Leipheimer

  4. #4
    Yen
    Yen is offline
    Surly Girly Yen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    SoCal
    Posts
    4,102
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Thanks for being so open with your feelings about your friend and your new concerns about cycling. We all gain from each others' life experiences here and I've shared my own anguish like it was among friends. Feel free to continue as your friend mends and even once he gets back on his feet. He sounds blessed to have so many people in his life who care and look after him.

    It sounds as if you are carrying a heavy weight of thoughts and emotions, having known him so strong before and now seeing him bruised and broken and in so much pain. That mental shock can also be felt physically so take care of yourself as you walk along with him through his ordeal.

    It took me a long time to feel as comfortable riding in traffic as I do now. In the beginning, I felt trepidation every time. Now, it hardly bothers me at all -- it feels like a challenge and I always stay alert, but I'm no longer afraid. And that's a good reason to pay even more attention. When a bike and a car/truck collide, the car/truck always wins.
    Specialized Roubaix Expert
    Surly Long Haul Trucker

  5. #5
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    13
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    we don't ride alone

    God Bless and I'm not even a God person . Best said, "We do not ride alone". Hope for a speedy recovery and the strength to ride again, as I,m sure he will.

  6. #6
    Lincoln, CA Mojo Slim's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Lincoln, CA
    My Bikes
    94 Giant ATX 760, 2001 Biachi Eros, 2005 Giant OCR2 Composite +
    Posts
    2,229
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Your friend, as you describe him, sounds like the kind of guy who will make sure he recovers, whatever it takes. And I'll be he's the kind of guy who really appreciates the friends he has who will help him through all this. Best to both of you.
    Truth is stranger than reality.
    '96 Giant ATX 760 MTB
    '01 Bianchi Eros
    '05 Giant OCR Llimited Carbon Fiber + upgrades

  7. #7
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Charlotte, N. Carolina, USA
    My Bikes
    Ross Centaur
    Posts
    10
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    My deepest heartfelt wishes for a speedy recovery go out to your friend! Thank-you so much for sharing your feelings and the story of your friend's tragic circumstances. I just recently started riding 'seriously' again, after a rather long layoff. When I am riding I am always aware of the possibility of my meeting similar tragic circumstances; but I am also aware of the enjoyment that I get from riding. The enjoyment for me is a reward that FAR surpasses the risks that I take while riding. I have had two bladder cancer surgeries over the last five years. After each surgery there was a recovery time of a few weeks; but both times I started riding again on the day that the doctor gave me the 'OK.' Even now, my rides aren't very long and are rather slow, but I simply enjoy riding WAY too much for ANYTHING to stop me! Stories like yours, and people like your friend have been great inspirations to me! They helped me find the strength...so that I just KNEW that I was going to recover; and again I wish your friend a speedy recovery...and MANY more miles of riding. I know that you and your friend are 'hurting,' but I can't imagine what you and he must be going through...however, it is VERY important that you and he must 'NEVER, EVER give up!' May God Bless you and your friend. Sincerest Best Wishes !

    Ron
    Last edited by Clunker; 12-04-08 at 01:05 AM.

  8. #8
    Senior Member NOS88's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Montgomery County, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    6,379
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Your friend's full recovery is much more likely with people like you in his life. It is a tough road ahead, but you've got to reach down and climb at least one more mountain together. I feel for both of you.
    A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. - S. Wright

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Northern NY...Brownville
    My Bikes
    Merlin Ti
    Posts
    1,697
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Good thoughts and wishes for him.
    Great of you to be so supportive.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Bob Nichols's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Union City, TN
    My Bikes
    Trek 7.5 FX, Trek Navigator 2.0
    Posts
    245
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jppe View Post
    I just need to talk............


    As much as I enjoy the many aspects of riding that we all have shared stories about, I was asking myself if it was really worth it-is it worth the risk. I now wonder what my mindset will be the next time I go riding. Will I be so concerned about vehicles and safety I become a threat to myself or other riders-or worry so much I lose a lot of the enjoyment??? I'll work through all that but it's bothering me more than I would have guessed.

    Stay safe!!
    I've thought about the risks of riding, but we can't sit around and worry about what might happen. Life is a risk, no matter what we do. We never know what might happen each time we get in the car, or each time we walk down the street. We can be in good health one minute and dead the next.

    I had a friend who was walking through the woods about 3 weeks ago to work on his duck blind. He was shot with a high-powered deer *****. He was 44, a father and a husband, and was active in his community and church. I always wonder why these things happen, but don't guess we'll ever understand.

    Your friend is in my prayers.

    Bob
    Trek 7.5 FX

  11. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Posts
    6,901
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Seems the Holidays always have some bad attached, just found out a business associate's daughter has bone cancer. Hope all is as good as it can be for you all.

  12. #12
    just keep riding BluesDawg's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Milledgeville, Georgia
    My Bikes
    2014 Specialized Crave Pro 29, 2014 Specialized Crux EVO Carbon Disc, 2012 Black Mountain Cycles Monster Cross, 2011 Specialized Roubaix SL3 Expert Compact, 2009 Salsa Casseroll, 2003 KHS Milano Tandem, 1986 Nishiki Cadence rigid MTB
    Posts
    12,713
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Your friend is fortunate to have a friend like you to help see him through his ordeal. But this is also an ordeal for you. Don't hesitate to share your thoughts with us and with other friends who are there with you.
    I have seen very clearly over the last six months how much friends and family can help get us through the worst of times. I have also seen how hard it can be on family and close friends to see a loved one going through such an ordeal. We all have to lean on each other to get through it.
    The more you ride your bike, the less your ass will hurt.

  13. #13
    Senior Member big john's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    In the foothills of Los Angeles County
    Posts
    10,710
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    jppe, you're obviously a good friend and a good man. Just do what you can and talk to him when he can listen. I'm sure having you around means a lot to him. Tell him you care about him. Having people care gives us something to hang on to.

    I think about not riding when people get hurt and when I read threads like this. I try to be careful and pick routes away from traffic, or try to go mountain biking more often. I'm actually more afraid when driving on the freeway than when I'm on my bike.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Kurt Erlenbach's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Space Coast, Florida
    Posts
    2,423
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jppe View Post
    .As much as I enjoy the many aspects of riding that we all have shared stories about, I was asking myself if it was really worth it-is it worth the risk. I now wonder what my mindset will be the next time I go riding.
    I think about this every time I ride. EVERY single time. When I was recovering from liver surgery after my colon cancer came back in 2005, knowing that I had about a 1-in-5 chance of living another five years, knowing that I had a brutal six months of chemo ahead, I came to the firm and fully-considered opinion that dying on the front end of a pickup truck beats dying curled up in bed "after a long illness."

    Is it worth the risk? Yes. Do everything reasoanbly possible to reduce the risk; ride safely yet assertively and predictably. Avoid unnecessarily dangerous roads. Avoid confrontations. Be situationally aware and think ahead to avoid dangers. Recognize that we older folks will not heal like the 20-somethings in the MTB forum, and avoid silliness like mountain biking. The result? Probably not dying curled up in bed (or maybe in bed at age 93), and probably not dying on the front end of a pickup truck. But maybe we will. That, however, is life.

  15. #15
    Time for a change. stapfam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    6 miles inland from the coast of Sussex, in the South East of England
    My Bikes
    Dale MT2000. Bianchi FS920 Kona Explosif. Giant TCR C. Boreas Ignis. Pinarello Fp Uno.
    Posts
    19,915
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by BluesDawg View Post
    Your friend is fortunate to have a friend like you to help see him through his ordeal. But this is also an ordeal for you. Don't hesitate to share your thoughts with us and with other friends who are there with you.
    I have seen very clearly over the last six months how much friends and family can help get us through the worst of times. I have also seen how hard it can be on family and close friends to see a loved one going through such an ordeal. We all have to lean on each other to get through it.
    BD and a few others have been through the other end of this ordeal- where we will rely on others to help us through.

    Can assure you it will be tough on you but the amount of help you are offering your friend means a heck of a lot to him. He has someone he can rely on- and that will help him through.
    How long was I in the army? Five foot seven.


    Spike Milligan

  16. #16
    Infinite Regress InfiniteRegress's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    DC Metro Area
    My Bikes
    Dahon Speed Pro TT (2008), Jamis Aurora Cyclocross (2005), Trek WSD 2100 (2007)
    Posts
    341
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Just be there for him. I know it's hard, but that is the biggest source of strength when you're in that situation. Yes, cycling is risky, but so is stepping out of your bathtub or front door. Life, by it's very nature, is inherently risky. It sounds like you're being a great friend already, so I just encourage you to keep doing what you're doing. Also, I don't know the circumstances of his accident, but if it was something that involved driver error, maybe help him use the accident as a reason for getting something changed that needs to be changed (if applicable). Unfortunately, it sometimes takes a serious situation like this to wake people up. Best of luck and sending positive thoughts to you and your friend.

  17. #17
    feros ferio John E's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    www.ci.encinitas.ca.us
    My Bikes
    1959 Capo; 1980 Peugeot PKN-10; 1981 Bianchi; 1988 Schwinn KOM-10;
    Posts
    14,678
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Thanks for sharing. Hearing about cyclists being killed or seriously injured always dampens my enthusiasm for my favorite sport. I am glad we can discuss this issue frankly here, because I have friends who always blame the victim and evidently feel invincible.

    Best wishes to your friend. I have a friend who went through the rear side window of a Ford Expedition at age 60. Not only did he recover fully, but the paramedics at the scene underestimated his age by 15 years. I also remember reading years ago about a Norwegian burn victim whose miraculous recovery was attributed to the fact that he had commuted by bicycle for many years.
    "Early to bed, early to rise. Work like hell, and advertise." -- George Stahlman
    Capo [dschaw'-poe]: 1959 Modell Campagnolo, S/N 40324; 1960 Sieger, S/N 42624
    Peugeot: 1970 UO-8, S/N 0010468
    Bianchi: 1981 Campione d'Italia, S/N 1.M9914
    Schwinn: 1988 Project KOM-10, S/N F804069

  18. #18
    feros ferio John E's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    www.ci.encinitas.ca.us
    My Bikes
    1959 Capo; 1980 Peugeot PKN-10; 1981 Bianchi; 1988 Schwinn KOM-10;
    Posts
    14,678
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Kerlenbach View Post
    I think about this every time I ride. EVERY single time. When I was recovering from liver surgery after my colon cancer came back in 2005, knowing that I had about a 1-in-5 chance of living another five years, knowing that I had a brutal six months of chemo ahead, I came to the firm and fully-considered opinion that dying on the front end of a pickup truck beats dying curled up in bed "after a long illness."

    Is it worth the risk? Yes. Do everything reasoanbly possible to reduce the risk; ride safely yet assertively and predictably. Avoid unnecessarily dangerous roads. Avoid confrontations. Be situationally aware and think ahead to avoid dangers. Recognize that we older folks will not heal like the 20-somethings in the MTB forum, and avoid silliness like mountain biking. The result? Probably not dying curled up in bed (or maybe in bed at age 93), and probably not dying on the front end of a pickup truck. But maybe we will. That, however, is life.
    Superb post. As Louis Pasteur said, "Chance favors the prepared mind." We cannot control everything in life, but we can influence the odds considerably.
    "Early to bed, early to rise. Work like hell, and advertise." -- George Stahlman
    Capo [dschaw'-poe]: 1959 Modell Campagnolo, S/N 40324; 1960 Sieger, S/N 42624
    Peugeot: 1970 UO-8, S/N 0010468
    Bianchi: 1981 Campione d'Italia, S/N 1.M9914
    Schwinn: 1988 Project KOM-10, S/N F804069

  19. #19
    Senior Member Kurt Erlenbach's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Space Coast, Florida
    Posts
    2,423
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Here's the link to jppe's original post about the accident. Sounds like a standard-issue left cross accident with an inattentive drive in a location where the cyclist was easliy visible. For me, one of the scariest and least avoidable kinds of crashes.

  20. #20
    Senior Member George's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Katy Texas
    My Bikes
    Specialized Roubaix - Look 566 - Jamis Coda Elite
    Posts
    5,254
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I cant add anything more that's been said here, you have my best wishs, take care.
    George

  21. #21
    Banned.
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Southern california
    My Bikes
    Lapierre CF Sensium 400. Jamis Ventura Sport. Trek 800. Giant Cypress.
    Posts
    3,498
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    A good friend only needs to be there just to be there. You are doing what you can do and many of us admire that.

  22. #22
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    4,262
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Physically the pain and recovery is his load to bear.

    Psycologicaly the two of you will pull each other through this trial together, much as you have on the bicycles. When he's feeling low you'll pull him and he'll be there to pull you when you're feeling low. When you're both down you'll slog along together, but you will both come through this. The physical and mental strength you've both been building over the years will get you both through this, the biggest challenge you've faced together yet.

    Our thoughts and prayers are with you both, and with your families.

  23. #23
    Senior Member CACycling's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Oxnard, CA
    My Bikes
    '08 Fuji Roubaix RC; '07 Schwinn Le Tour GS; '92 Diamond Back Ascent EX
    Posts
    4,432
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jppe View Post
    As much as I enjoy the many aspects of riding that we all have shared stories about, I was asking myself if it was really worth it-is it worth the risk. I now wonder what my mindset will be the next time I go riding. Will I be so concerned about vehicles and safety I become a threat to myself or other riders-or worry so much I lose a lot of the enjoyment??? I'll work through all that but it's bothering me more than I would have guessed.
    I can relate. About 20 years ago, I was riding my motorcycle back to work after lunch. I came upon an accident. Semi had made a left in front of a motorcycle. I immediately recognized the bike as belonging to a coworker who I rode with often. The officer told me it didn't look like he was going to make it (he didn't). I had the duty of going to get his wife and taking her to the hospital. He left behind two beautiful young daughters.

    I lost the joy of riding after that. It wasn't fear, just didn't find the enjoyment I once had. I sold the bike a few months later and haven't ridden a motorcycle since. I was actually thinking of getting back on a motorcycle right before I returned to cycling last year. I guess it was time for me to be back on 2 wheels. How will you feel? Only time will tell. For now, concentrate on being the good friend that you are and let the rest of it come when it feels right.

  24. #24
    Banned.
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Pensacola, Florida
    My Bikes
    CAAD 10 4
    Posts
    6,565
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I'll have your friend, his family and you in my prayers jppe. People like you as friends will go a long way in helping him recover. Please continue to share and to keep us updated on his progress.

    Bill

  25. #25
    Senior Member ?? Beverly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Englewood,Ohio
    My Bikes
    2007 Trek Madone 5.0 WSD - 2007 Trek 4300 WSD - 2008 Trek 520
    Posts
    5,090
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I hope your friend makes a complete and speedy recovery. Thanks for sharing with us.
    =============================================================
    My cancer updates:
    https://www.mylifeline.org/beverlyow...=myupdates.cfm

    Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.
    -- Antonio Smith

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •