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Old 02-25-09, 10:17 PM   #1
BCRider
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O/T Drafting older guys for the Military

I got this in an email from a buddy. It's likely old as the hills but I'm sure there's many that have not seen it yet.

Nothing to do with bicycles but it definetly applies to us 50+ blokes! ! ! !

Quote:
Drafting Guys over 60

----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier----

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters:
Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some ******* that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical s-of-a-b....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

***How about recruiting Women over 50 ...with PMS !!!
You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!

If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!
Hope it gave you a laugh or two.
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Old 02-26-09, 05:59 AM   #2
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LOL, good one
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Old 02-26-09, 07:42 AM   #3
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I'm drafting older guys every time I go out with a group - and I guess I've forgotten the rest of the thread title - what was it now?...
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Old 02-26-09, 10:51 AM   #4
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I've served in the Army, and with the advent of hostilities in the Middle East I wanted to re-enter out of a call to duty.

I was too old at the time.

I also concluded that unless they had an espresso machine in the M1 Abrams and were willing to pull over every 45 minutes for a potty break, that maybe I'd do more harm than good.
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Old 02-26-09, 11:20 AM   #5
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The surgeon who removed my wife's colon cancer and who is the head surgeon of the group that just did my colonoscopy is halfway through his tour in Takreet as a part of the reserves. He does his work in a tent. As he is well over 50, he probably had a get out of jail free card, but he wouldn't hear of it. He was proud to do his job. I believe that he would really like this email.
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Old 02-26-09, 01:50 PM   #6
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In our club we have a lot of guys (and one woman) who are in the military, and I've drafted them all! No worries, they ride a straight line and are very consistant, call out obsticles, etc.

Rick / OCRR
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Old 02-26-09, 09:10 PM   #7
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Like they say, youth is wasted on young people.
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Old 02-26-09, 09:53 PM   #8
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With today's technology, physically and mentally fit folks in their 40s and 50s are arguably the best qualified to serve in the military.
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Old 02-26-09, 10:18 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John E View Post
With today's technology, physically and mentally fit folks in their 40s and 50s are arguably the best qualified to serve in the military.
A good argument to have the folks serve that start these wars. Disregard the menally fit requirement....
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Old 02-27-09, 01:53 AM   #10
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A good argument to have the folks serve that start these wars. Disregard the menally fit requirement....
Like the old days. At least Kings used to have to show up for the battles and take their chances with the rest of the people.
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