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Fifty Plus (50+) Share the victories, challenges, successes and special concerns of bicyclists 50 and older. Especially useful for those entering or reentering bicycling.

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Old 04-04-13, 09:16 AM   #1
leftthread
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You know you're old when...

You're in the checkout lane at the thrift shop with a large print calculator and a magnifying glass.
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Old 04-04-13, 09:46 AM   #2
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They finally stop "carding you" when you buy a bottle of wine.

You look at your smart phone and realize that it has more computing power than the spacecraft on a Saturn V mission to the moon.

You have shoes that are older than twenty years.

The sports heroes of your formative years are dying of old age.

Scrap parts from your oldest parts box now command premium eBay prices.
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Old 04-04-13, 10:31 AM   #3
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Scrap parts from your oldest parts box now command premium eBay prices.
And it's not just bike stuff. A couple of years ago I took a Zebco open faced spinning reel, circa 1970, in to the fishing shop to get new line put on it and the dude doing the work called all of his buddies over to ooh and ahh at it.
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Old 04-04-13, 11:22 AM   #4
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When the co-eds at the local University hold the door open for you, and say "go ahead Sir".
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Old 04-04-13, 11:45 AM   #5
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When the co-eds at the local University hold the door open for you, and say "go ahead Sir".
That's not old, that's just sad.
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Old 04-04-13, 12:06 PM   #6
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And you realize that they're younger than your granddaughter.
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Old 04-04-13, 12:16 PM   #7
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When you spend more time grooming your ears than shaving the rest of your face.
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Old 04-04-13, 12:17 PM   #8
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You have socks that are brightly colored and you remember wearing them to the disco.
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Old 04-04-13, 12:38 PM   #9
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No joke this. I get junk mail for discount funeral services.
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Old 04-04-13, 12:42 PM   #10
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You find yourself deep in the bike trails taking a much needed break, soaked in sweat, feeling like a 20 year old, then realizing you are lost even with the map and a 30 year old 'kid' has to point you in the right direction saying, "Yes Sir" more than once,,,,,
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Old 04-04-13, 12:50 PM   #11
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Going to a restaurant/cafeteria and getting the 'senior discount' without even asking --


...and the really sad part was that I was only in my early 30s at the time! My 'winter-time' full beard was starting to get a bit gray though. I quit growing beards in the winter for the next eighteen years.

Fast forward to a few years ago -- I was asked to be 'Santa' for the housing development that I delivered mail to... This pic was taken when I wasn't even fifty yet - and that is my real beard - grown in just seven weeks!



And no, that isn't my real belly. Yes, I do have a pillow inside the Santa suit!!!
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Old 04-04-13, 01:13 PM   #12
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Ask for change to play some music on the jukebox and have no idea how to.
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Old 04-04-13, 01:25 PM   #13
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... when the chics who flirt with you are old ...
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Old 04-04-13, 01:45 PM   #14
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When you don't wear bibs anymore because of the rest stops.
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Old 04-04-13, 02:14 PM   #15
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Quote:
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When the co-eds at the local University hold the door open for you, and say "go ahead Sir".
Man, do I hate that!

I work in a company where I swear they take anyone who passes their 50th out into the parking lot and put them out of their misery. Average age seems to be south of 30, and I get that "sir" crap alla time...
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Old 04-04-13, 03:36 PM   #16
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...when it's hard to poop...every damn time!
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Old 04-04-13, 03:51 PM   #17
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..when you check out the Moms rather than the daughters..
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Old 04-04-13, 03:58 PM   #18
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When you have cycling clothes (and a bike) older than some of the guys you ride with.
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Old 04-04-13, 03:58 PM   #19
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When it takes 20 minutes to take a pee if you forget your pill.
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Old 04-04-13, 04:04 PM   #20
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Am only 80 . . . don't know what you guys are talking about!
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Old 04-04-13, 04:07 PM   #21
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Stuff you remember from your 20s and 30s is now showing up in the "This Day in History" columns.
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Old 04-04-13, 04:18 PM   #22
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When you won't give up your cleats and road pedals.

When you start riding after a long layoff and your wool jersey has somehow shrunk in the drawer.

When you hear someone remark: "That guy is riding in a time warp" when you ride by.

When your legs hit your belly when you're on the drops.

When nobody has heard of your favorite pros.
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Old 04-04-13, 04:34 PM   #23
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When the real reason you have a very light bike is so you can pick it up and put it on the car rack, or, into the house.
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Old 04-04-13, 05:06 PM   #24
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Am only 80 . . . don't know what you guys are talking about!
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Old 04-04-13, 05:25 PM   #25
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We now talk about our medical issues and knee replacements instead of days of old when we spoke about athletic achievements and sexual conquests.
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