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Old 05-19-06, 07:45 AM   #1
Stacey
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Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Help! I've become hopelessly addicted to the Jerry Springer Show. Three hours of it every morning and I still want more. I can feel my IQ points slipping away by the second as I watch and it takes all day for me to recover them.

I'm even getting strong desires to subscribe to a couple Pay-Per-View events. This is worse than nicotine and meth combined.

I can't help but wonder... are these people for real or is this just a scripted event like pro wrasslin?
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Old 05-19-06, 07:47 AM   #2
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Put the remote down and step away from the TV. Get on your bike and ride until the feeling goes away.
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Old 05-19-06, 07:49 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by Stacey
Help! I've become hopelessly addicted to the Jerry Springer Show. Three hours of it every morning and I still want more. I can feel my IQ points slipping away by the second as I watch and it takes all day for me to recover them.

I'm even getting strong desires to subscribe to a couple Pay-Per-View events. This is worse than nicotine and meth combined.

I can't help but wonder... are these people for real or is this just a scripted event like pro wrasslin?
It's got to be scripted. Especially with the way every guest seems to feel compelled to toss their clothes off before fighting. Never got why they did that. Weird and very scary.
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Old 05-19-06, 07:49 AM   #4
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Put the remote down and step away from the TV. Get on your bike and ride until the feeling goes away.

You want me to die right here and now, don't you? I can't cook four omlettes without becoming totally exhausted and you want me to go for a bike ride

Springer is so much fun
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Old 05-19-06, 07:53 AM   #5
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Three words...


Steve! Steve! Steve!

He is almost as entertaining as Jerry. I saw him host the show when Jerry was off once and he is actually pretty good. I was home sick that day, otherwise I don't watch daytime TV.
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Old 05-19-06, 08:05 AM   #6
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Turn off Jerry and turn on Judge Joe Brown - that's what I'd be watching if I was home during the day. All the judge shows. Judge Joe, Judge Judy, People's Court. Not Judge Mathis (is he still on). I watched him for a while due to the whole attending the same college loyalty stuff but he really sucks. Still, better than Jerry.
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Old 05-19-06, 08:07 AM   #7
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They're on in the afternoon... I watch them too

Jeebus, I do miss Morton Downey Jr. <bows head in reverence>
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Old 05-19-06, 08:14 AM   #8
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I shun thee....you are no longer my sister until you purge this nastiness from your system. I call this tough love.

Oh....and yes, its scripted, the people are not real. Local radio interviewed a local guy who "played" on the Jerry Springer show about 7 or 8 times he said.
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Old 05-19-06, 08:16 AM   #9
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OK, How about Dr. Phil?

I see him as a Jerry for the highbrows.
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Old 05-19-06, 08:19 AM   #10
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Stacey, ask the doctor to change your meds, that should help.
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Old 05-19-06, 08:56 AM   #11
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Jerry is only OK if it's to laugh at that crap.

It's better to mute the show, and play back the audio from a previous show, and figure out what episodes are in synch with each other, but just have different actor cominations and different audio tracks.
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Old 05-19-06, 09:11 AM   #12
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Stacey,Stacey,Stacey ....[ hangs head]

With love & compasion from all of us, we can get you through this.
Start slowly, watch only 2 hrs of Jerry
after a couple of weeks only watch an hour.
Eventually get it down to the just Jerry's words of wisdom.

It will be a slow & painful, but we're here for you.
But I know you can do it
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Old 05-19-06, 09:23 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by Stacey
You want me to die right here and now, don't you? I can't cook four omlettes without becoming totally exhausted and you want me to go for a bike ride

Springer is so much fun
You are weak. You need motivation. I'll go over there and you can tow me around on a Burley trailer while I crack the whip. Exercise is good for you. Jerry isn't.
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Old 05-19-06, 10:00 AM   #14
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The only cure for you is either TV Land or the Game Show network. Nothing like watching reruns of Match Game '76 to eradicate your remaining brain cells.

Or those home shopping channels. Ten minutes of looking at a ring or some escapee from the Lingerie Dept. at Wal-mart modelling polyester pantsuits and you'll run screaming to your bike.
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Old 05-19-06, 05:11 PM   #15
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Take up knitting. It's the new thing now.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 05-19-06, 05:18 PM   #16
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use your television as a dart board, and use rocks as darts.
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Old 05-19-06, 07:09 PM   #17
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I myself think it's fake but i hear ya, years ago I used to watch it and would be so ashame if anyone caught me, i was tangled with the desperation these people put themselves to on tv, yeah it is kind of addicting to watch what exactly a best lover midget who slept with his gf grandmother is like..lol.. i mean all these themes makes no sense at all and you just sit ther and watch and wonder if the other half of the world can really be like this! I have been tempted to rent to non rated version of this just to see to what extreme they take this, but I would be too ashame in doing so.. but that was years ago, I cant say I have watched that show since then.. and I dont turn it on to make sure i dont become and addict again!
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