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  1. #1
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Greetings from Chuck Norris

    Ha caught your ass, i bet you where waiting to see some silly picture of Chuck Norris or a article about his stupid exserize crap.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  2. #2
    That darn Yankee TexasGuy's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris can smell what The Rock is cooking because The Rock is Chuck's personal chef.
    Life is about hanging onto what you think is important and finding out what really is important.
    "Stop Ruining my joke!", "No, a joke implies humor attached at no additional cost"
    So many sayings, so little sig space.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TexasGuy
    Chuck Norris can smell what The Rock is cooking because The Rock is Chuck's personal chef.
    You know it and Hulk Hogan is Chuck Norris's UPS delivery man.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  4. #4
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  5. #5
    That darn Yankee TexasGuy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Stormcrowe
    ouch
    i just got round house kicked by Chuck Norris when i opened this thread and scrolled down. THANKS ALOT
    Life is about hanging onto what you think is important and finding out what really is important.
    "Stop Ruining my joke!", "No, a joke implies humor attached at no additional cost"
    So many sayings, so little sig space.

  6. #6
    Just a student norsehabanero's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Gear Jammer
    Ha caught your ass, i bet you where waiting to see some silly picture of Chuck Norris or a article about his stupid exserize crap.
    it too was roundhouse kicked into this thread before i opened it

    i was expecting to see chucknorris facts though

    http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/index.html
    http://www.thebicyclingguitarist.net.../bios/bike.gif about to start winter quarter , enjoying school so far

  7. #7
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  8. #8
    oh, snap. Flippin Sweet's Avatar
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    Helen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.
    Hi. I don't think we've been introduced. I'm awesome.

  9. #9
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was an exhibition game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  10. #10
    I can't find my pants mirona's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flippin Sweet
    Helen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

  11. #11
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep. Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus AND the jeep.
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  12. #12
    Retro-nerd georgiaboy's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
    Would you like a dream with that?

  13. #13
    Kicked out of the Webelos bluebottle1's Avatar
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    My favorite:

    If you can hear Chuck Norris, it is because he wants you to. If you cannot hear Chuck Norris, you have mere seconds to live.
    ______________________________________________

    Kicked out of the Webelos.

  14. #14
    SwampFox Little Leo's Avatar
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    My girlfriends dad looks exactly like Hulk Hogan. My God will that scare the **** out of you when you are introduced to your girlfriends parients and here dad looks like Hulk Hogan.


    YOU DID WHAT WITH MY DAUGHTER!!!

  15. #15
    Evil Genius capsicum's Avatar
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    Chuck norris took an entire bottle of sleeping pills once...


    ...it was the only time he's ever blinked.
    "Data is not the plural form of annecdote."
    "yuo ned to be deadurcated"

  16. #16
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris took an entire bottle of sleeping pills and people thought he was only bored!
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  17. #17
    BF's Level 12 Wizard SingingSabre's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris exports so much pain he has to outsource it's production. This is how Wal*Mart gets its employees extra misery during that red and green "season" between Halloween and New Years.
    Shameless plug (my sites):
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bklyn
    Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.

  18. #18
    Mullet Boy! Pink_Ninja's Avatar
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    God created the world in 7 days, Chucky created Go in 1
    Bansheeeee!

  19. #19
    Long haired freak. wethepeople's Avatar
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    Once, I heard a chuck noris joke and decided they were all lame.

    So I ripped the guys head off and crapped down his throat.

    "the bus came by and I got on, that's when it all began...there was Cowboy Neal at the wheel of a bus to never-ever land."


  20. #20
    The AVatar Ninja SaabFan's Avatar
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    Pfft. Chuck can't even come close to Real Ultimate Power.

    Except when he does 12 minute burnouts on Mr T's face from roundhousing at 9,000 rpm.
    Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: FISH!

  21. #21
    Evil Genius capsicum's Avatar
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    Ghosts are caused by Chuck norris killing people faster than death can process them.
    "Data is not the plural form of annecdote."
    "yuo ned to be deadurcated"

  22. #22
    staring at the mountains superdex's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris shaves with Occam's Razor.

  23. #23
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Stormcrowe
    He is "The" man.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  24. #24
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by superdex
    Chuck Norris shaves with Occam's Razor.
    Nope i hear he shaves his face with a butcher knife.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  25. #25
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by capsicum
    Ghosts are caused by Chuck norris killing people faster than death can process them.
    You know it, like the bike forums trying to correctly count all of our posts.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

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