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  1. #1
    Senior Member Crono's Avatar
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    I amaze even myself sometimes

    So last Friday I went out with some old friends I haven't seen in a while and I got pretty wasted. I have a spotty memory of that night, especially between 1:30am to 4am. I seriously magically woke up at Denny's.

    Anyway, so last night I got this message from a random person on AIM "Hey you." It was a friend of my friends whom I had just met that night. So we chatted it up about what a great night it was, and the fun we had doing the drunken dials in Denny's.

    So then I told her about the drunken texts I sometimes do which don't go over so well because, well, have you ever tried typing drunk? Yeah, same thing happens. I recalled an enigmatic one and showed it to her. The victim was a random person whose number I didn't recognize from that night. I typed it out to her word for word: "Closed, locked, and all al new and new next time me in"

    She said "Um, you sent that one to ME. I gave you my number and you gave me your AIM. How else do you think we're chatting right now?"

    Wow, so apparently when I'm wasted I tend to give out my AIM name. That's so juvenile! Like, something I totally would've done back in oh, HIGH SCHOOL.

    On the other hand, I managed to pick up digits when in a blacked out state.

    I have no idea how I managed that. Anyway, go me


    Any other stories of drunken accomplishments? REAL accomplishments. Managing to pull down your knickers before pooping doesn't count.

  2. #2
    later free_pizza's Avatar
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    drunken texts rule!

  3. #3
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Crono, how old are you? For some reason I thought you weren't of legal drinking age. Not that it will stop you...............

    I don't really drink booze. If I do, I'll get plastered on half a wine cooler...and I'm good and done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  4. #4
    later free_pizza's Avatar
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    from his profile, it appears he is 25

  5. #5
    Senior Member Crono's Avatar
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    Ditto

    Contrary to popular belief, I believe that's old enough to justify lying about my age.

    So if anyone else asks, I'm 19.

  6. #6
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Gotcha!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  7. #7
    later free_pizza's Avatar
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    ima gonna be 25 soon

  8. #8
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    You spring chicken, you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crono
    So last Friday I went out with some old friends I haven't seen in a while and I got pretty wasted. I have a spotty memory of that night, especially between 1:30am to 4am. I seriously magically woke up at Denny's.

    Anyway, so last night I got this message from a random person on AIM "Hey you." It was a friend of my friends whom I had just met that night. So we chatted it up about what a great night it was, and the fun we had doing the drunken dials in Denny's.

    So then I told her about the drunken texts I sometimes do which don't go over so well because, well, have you ever tried typing drunk? Yeah, same thing happens. I recalled an enigmatic one and showed it to her. The victim was a random person whose number I didn't recognize from that night. I typed it out to her word for word: "Closed, locked, and all al new and new next time me in"

    She said "Um, you sent that one to ME. I gave you my number and you gave me your AIM. How else do you think we're chatting right now?"

    Wow, so apparently when I'm wasted I tend to give out my AIM name. That's so juvenile! Like, something I totally would've done back in oh, HIGH SCHOOL.

    On the other hand, I managed to pick up digits when in a blacked out state.

    I have no idea how I managed that. Anyway, go me


    Any other stories of drunken accomplishments? REAL accomplishments. Managing to pull down your knickers before pooping doesn't count.
    Good deal .
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Crono's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Song of Serenity
    Gotcha!
    Seriously

    Here's another story where I got owned for my age (yes, I'm full of stories)

    About a year ago I was at a college party and I was talking to this one girl. It was on a Saturday and she was saying "Man, I'm having lots of fun, but I really should be studying for finals..."
    "Finals? What are those? *sarcasm*"
    "Oh, you're out of school?"
    "Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if I'm the oldest one here..."
    "Ooh, I like older guys! So how old are you, like 21?"

    Inside I was giddy. She *likes* older guys! *I'm* an older guy! It's a match made in heaven! Honesty prevails! I leaned closer and smiled "I'm twenty-four"

    It took her a while to digest what I had just said. "...it was nice meeting you, Derek"

    </dismissed>

  11. #11
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Well you DO look young........I guess that IS to your advantage, huh?
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Song of Serenity
    You spring chicken, you.
    I thought he was a wild turkey .
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  13. #13
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    I got my huntin' ***!!


    <---------------
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Song of Serenity
    I got my huntin' ***!!


    <---------------
    So you can shoot?, well i'd rather throw the bullets much more fun to hit someone with by throwing then shooting.
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  15. #15
    Banned.
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    I'm pretty much drunk all of the time. including now

  16. #16
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Gear Jammer
    So you can shoot?, well i'd rather throw the bullets much more fun to hit someone with by throwing then shooting.

    Well you know that's not me in the pic, right?
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  17. #17
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CrosseyedCrickt
    I'm pretty much drunk all of the time. including now
    Very nice .
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  18. #18
    Senior Member Mr. Gear Jammer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Song of Serenity
    Well you know that's not me in the pic, right?
    Actually i thought that was you .
    Tropical pole vaulting is the shiznit.

  19. #19
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Gear Jammer
    Actually i thought that was you .

    Oh, I'm a tomboy alright. But nope. Not me. Avatars were switched.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  20. #20
    Chairman of the Bored catatonic's Avatar
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    My best was probably drunken passed-out kung-fu. Pissed off dog vs me.

    Pissed off dog was the dog at the frat house I partied at....she like attacking me on sight. Normally I wrestle with the dog until it's too tired to fight.

    This night, I was on the couch after having practically an entire tray of jello shots.....from what the folks around said, the dog snapped on my hand pretty hard (I had small wounds the next morning), and somehow my foot shot up by my ear and smacked the dog.....dog backed off, cocked it's head to the side, then quietly went back to her chair in the other room.

    ....from that day on, oddly enough that doggie treated me like a member of the house. No more trying to use me as a chew toy, and would even actually be friendly for a change.

    It was a mighty odd drunk achievement....and I wasn't even awake at the time!
    -------- __@
    ----- _`\<,_
    ---- (*)/ (*)
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Ring Ring, Ring Ring, the bell went Ring Ring Ring.

  21. #21
    Not fluent in English Runaway Cyclist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by free_pizza
    from his profile, it appears he is 25
    Yes, and according to his profile, his interests are "****, murder, arson, and ****". Very informative...
    You can correct my English mistakes.

  22. #22
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Yikes!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  23. #23
    Senior Member Crono's Avatar
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    Yes, I said **** twice. I like ****.

    Don't worry, it's a Mel Brooks reference. If you haven't seen Blazing Saddles before, I highly urge you to.

    Serenity, I see you're appalled. Maybe it's because **** is such a harsh word. If you lighten it up a little, maybe it'll seem less offensive. Try a different term, like "surprise sex."

    Then again, if you put a "G" in front of "****," it's really nothing but a delicious fruit. Small, round, voluptuous. Some even have nipples. Just looking at some makes me want to **** the crap out of em. Whoops, I meant "have surprise sex."

    ...okay, I'll stop now

  24. #24
    Not fluent in English Runaway Cyclist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crono
    Don't worry, it's a Mel Brooks reference. If you haven't seen Blazing Saddles before, I highly urge you to.
    I have seen in it already. I liked it but found it a bit overrated. Anyway, a movie with Gene Wilder is always worth it.

    Thank goodness it's just a quote. As you are a ninja too, it would be very easy for you to fulfill your interests.
    You can correct my English mistakes.

  25. #25
    Senior Member mister's Avatar
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    My GF and I threw a few parties last year. Our last one we started drinking before making dinner for 25 people. By the time we started cooking, we were quite drunk and stumbling around the kitchen. We managed to pull off baked ziti, honey baked ham, ceaser salad, garlic bread and some other stuff and everyone loved it.
    Brilliant!

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