Thanks, I feel better.
After spending weeks debating whether to pay somebody to do our taxes this year or to go with Turbo Tax Home and Business, we made the mistake of going with Turbo Tax. Problem is that it won't even update. There are 14 updates available and it won't get them.
I've googled the error codes and tried all the suggested fixes. Two hours later it still doesn't work. Amazing! I'm sayin' screw it and calling a human being tomorrow.