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Old 03-30-07, 12:05 PM   #1
Ken B.
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So there I was ...

There I was, snorkeling about fifty feet from the sloop anchored in a snug little harbor off Peter Island. Had my face in the water, heading toward the boat. I heard the people on the boat yelling something so I swam closer. About ten feet from the boat, suddenly I found myself being stared down by a eighteen-foot barracuda (maybe six-foot, but still pretty big). I started back in a hurry, to the great amusement of the people on the boat. The 'cuda swam off and I climbed up the dive latter. Turns out they were telling me not to chase the barracuda.

What's your "so there I was" story?
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Old 03-30-07, 12:06 PM   #2
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If you're not swimming naked, I don't see what the danger is with swimming around barracudas...
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Old 03-30-07, 12:10 PM   #3
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wow! glad you can share the story, barracudas are notorious for being agressive and attracted to shiny things swimmers and divers wear.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:12 PM   #4
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So there I was, duct taped to the table. All I see is explody pup coming at me with a cloth that he had apparently dipped in ether. I go unconcious and eventually wake up to find my body covered in asterisk tattoos and brands that still have smoke coming off of them.

Oddly, it didn't phase me.

Then he threw me into a tank filled with barracudas. I couldn't chase them, though, because of the duct tape.

It was an interesting day.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:15 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by CyLowe97
So there I was, duct taped to the table. All I see is explody pup coming at me with a cloth that he had apparently dipped in ether. I go unconcious and eventually wake up to find my body covered in asterisk tattoos and brands that still have smoke coming off of them.

Oddly, it didn't phase me.

Then he threw me into a tank filled with barracudas. I couldn't chase them, though, because of the duct tape.

It was an interesting day.
Actually, it wasn't a cloth dipped in ether I put over your face. It was my underwear.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:24 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by explody pup
Actually, it wasn't a cloth dipped in ether I put over your face. It was my underwear.
That explains a lot about the whole incident.

By the way, how much do I owe you for the duct tape rental?
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Old 03-30-07, 12:26 PM   #7
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That explains a lot about the whole incident.

By the way, how much do I owe you for the duct tape rental?
It's on the house.

By the way, you can get half-off next time if you refer someone.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:34 PM   #8
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It's on the house.

By the way, you can get half-off next time if you refer someone.
I already told jsharr. He's on his way over.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:36 PM   #9
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I already told jsharr. He's on his way over.
bringing my own duct tape and barracuda as well. easy with the branding iron this, please.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-30-07, 12:45 PM   #10
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bringing my own duct tape and barracuda as well. easy with the branding iron this, please.
You do realise I'm a professional, right? That's like bringing your own silverware to a fine restaraunt...

Anyway, light on branding iron, I'm guessing same on the electroshock? What about the weasles: just really hungry or completely starved?
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Old 03-30-07, 12:56 PM   #11
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Obviously you have never seen my silverware, Sir!

No, crank the EST all the way to 11 and set the weasels to "ravenous".
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:02 PM   #12
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are you still doing that stale old weasels-in-a-sack-over-the-head bit?
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Old 03-30-07, 01:05 PM   #13
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are you still doing that stale old weasels-in-a-sack-over-the-head bit?
Hell no. Do you take me for an amatuer? They're in a box, now.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:07 PM   #14
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Obviously you have never seen my silverware, Sir!

No, crank the EST all the way to 11 and set the weasels to "ravenous".
No, butthole. Weasels, not ravens. I'm not insured for eye-pecking.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:10 PM   #15
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No, butthole. Weasels, not ravens. I'm not insured for eye-pecking.
"Nice to meet you!" said the pot to the kettle
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Old 03-30-07, 01:14 PM   #16
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"Nice to meet you!" said the pot to the kettle
Yeah, right. If cookware could talk it'd probably be saying something along the lines of "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THE FIRE! GOD IT HURTS! STOP! GOD, NO! KILL ME! END THIS SUFFERING! AAHHHHHHAAAAAHAAAAHHHHHHHH!"
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Old 03-30-07, 01:16 PM   #17
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you want real torture? i have to go to some neighbor kid's two year old birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's tonight.

animatronic animal nightmares tonight, for sure.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:20 PM   #18
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you want real torture? i have to go to some neighbor kid's two year old birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's tonight.

animatronic animal nightmares tonight, for sure.
You're either very brave or very foolish. Because, 1. The kid isn't going to remember you being at his 2nd birthday party so who gives a crap, 2. Chuck E. Cheese is a Class 1 biohazard environment, and 3. There is no bar.

Of course, you can always remedy #3 with a hipflask and your favorite distilled spirits.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:24 PM   #19
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Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
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Old 03-30-07, 01:26 PM   #20
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don't worry. i'll be spiking the kids' punch with absinthe.

and i'll be the one creating the biohazard in there. unless they got sneeze-guards. those things baffle my attempts to sneeze on things!
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Old 03-30-07, 01:28 PM   #21
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CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:28 PM   #22
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don't worry. i'll be spiking the kids' punch with absinthe.

and i'll be the one creating the biohazard in there. unless they got sneeze-guards. those things baffle my attempts to sneeze on things!
Sneezing on things in Chuck E. Cheese is like trying to make the ocean wet with a 1-gallon watering can... in a thunderstorm... at the bottom of the ocean.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:30 PM   #23
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CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
And if you lose at said games, you can still beat them up and take their tickets!
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Old 03-30-07, 01:31 PM   #24
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thank you for that oh redudant man of redundancy!!!! about what I expect from some that knows jack about silverware and ravenous weasels.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 03-30-07, 01:34 PM   #25
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CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
probably not. i have not been able to lift my arms since the duct tape and branding incident.

i'm typing this with a coffee swizzle stick that is held in my teeth, by the way.
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