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  1. #1
    Grand Vizier
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    So there I was ...

    There I was, snorkeling about fifty feet from the sloop anchored in a snug little harbor off Peter Island. Had my face in the water, heading toward the boat. I heard the people on the boat yelling something so I swam closer. About ten feet from the boat, suddenly I found myself being stared down by a eighteen-foot barracuda (maybe six-foot, but still pretty big). I started back in a hurry, to the great amusement of the people on the boat. The 'cuda swam off and I climbed up the dive latter. Turns out they were telling me not to chase the barracuda.

    What's your "so there I was" story?

  2. #2
    explody pup
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    If you're not swimming naked, I don't see what the danger is with swimming around barracudas...

  3. #3
    Future Spike! Imachad's Avatar
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    wow! glad you can share the story, barracudas are notorious for being agressive and attracted to shiny things swimmers and divers wear.

  4. #4
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    So there I was, duct taped to the table. All I see is explody pup coming at me with a cloth that he had apparently dipped in ether. I go unconcious and eventually wake up to find my body covered in asterisk tattoos and brands that still have smoke coming off of them.

    Oddly, it didn't phase me.

    Then he threw me into a tank filled with barracudas. I couldn't chase them, though, because of the duct tape.

    It was an interesting day.

  5. #5
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    So there I was, duct taped to the table. All I see is explody pup coming at me with a cloth that he had apparently dipped in ether. I go unconcious and eventually wake up to find my body covered in asterisk tattoos and brands that still have smoke coming off of them.

    Oddly, it didn't phase me.

    Then he threw me into a tank filled with barracudas. I couldn't chase them, though, because of the duct tape.

    It was an interesting day.
    Actually, it wasn't a cloth dipped in ether I put over your face. It was my underwear.

  6. #6
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by explody pup
    Actually, it wasn't a cloth dipped in ether I put over your face. It was my underwear.
    That explains a lot about the whole incident.

    By the way, how much do I owe you for the duct tape rental?

  7. #7
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    That explains a lot about the whole incident.

    By the way, how much do I owe you for the duct tape rental?
    It's on the house.

    By the way, you can get half-off next time if you refer someone.

  8. #8
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by explody pup
    It's on the house.

    By the way, you can get half-off next time if you refer someone.
    I already told jsharr. He's on his way over.

  9. #9
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    I already told jsharr. He's on his way over.
    bringing my own duct tape and barracuda as well. easy with the branding iron this, please.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  10. #10
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr
    bringing my own duct tape and barracuda as well. easy with the branding iron this, please.
    You do realise I'm a professional, right? That's like bringing your own silverware to a fine restaraunt...

    Anyway, light on branding iron, I'm guessing same on the electroshock? What about the weasles: just really hungry or completely starved?

  11. #11
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Obviously you have never seen my silverware, Sir!

    No, crank the EST all the way to 11 and set the weasels to "ravenous".
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  12. #12
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    are you still doing that stale old weasels-in-a-sack-over-the-head bit?

  13. #13
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    are you still doing that stale old weasels-in-a-sack-over-the-head bit?
    Hell no. Do you take me for an amatuer? They're in a box, now.

  14. #14
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr
    Obviously you have never seen my silverware, Sir!

    No, crank the EST all the way to 11 and set the weasels to "ravenous".
    No, butthole. Weasels, not ravens. I'm not insured for eye-pecking.

  15. #15
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by explody pup
    No, butthole. Weasels, not ravens. I'm not insured for eye-pecking.
    "Nice to meet you!" said the pot to the kettle

  16. #16
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    "Nice to meet you!" said the pot to the kettle
    Yeah, right. If cookware could talk it'd probably be saying something along the lines of "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THE FIRE! GOD IT HURTS! STOP! GOD, NO! KILL ME! END THIS SUFFERING! AAHHHHHHAAAAAHAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

  17. #17
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    you want real torture? i have to go to some neighbor kid's two year old birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's tonight.

    animatronic animal nightmares tonight, for sure.

  18. #18
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    you want real torture? i have to go to some neighbor kid's two year old birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's tonight.

    animatronic animal nightmares tonight, for sure.
    You're either very brave or very foolish. Because, 1. The kid isn't going to remember you being at his 2nd birthday party so who gives a crap, 2. Chuck E. Cheese is a Class 1 biohazard environment, and 3. There is no bar.

    Of course, you can always remedy #3 with a hipflask and your favorite distilled spirits.

  19. #19
    Tail End Charlie Ritehsedad's Avatar
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    Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

  20. #20
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    don't worry. i'll be spiking the kids' punch with absinthe.

    and i'll be the one creating the biohazard in there. unless they got sneeze-guards. those things baffle my attempts to sneeze on things!

  21. #21
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  22. #22
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by CyLowe97
    don't worry. i'll be spiking the kids' punch with absinthe.

    and i'll be the one creating the biohazard in there. unless they got sneeze-guards. those things baffle my attempts to sneeze on things!
    Sneezing on things in Chuck E. Cheese is like trying to make the ocean wet with a 1-gallon watering can... in a thunderstorm... at the bottom of the ocean.

  23. #23
    explody pup
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr
    CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
    And if you lose at said games, you can still beat them up and take their tickets!

  24. #24
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    thank you for that oh redudant man of redundancy!!!! about what I expect from some that knows jack about silverware and ravenous weasels.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  25. #25
    Up on the Down Side CyLowe97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr
    CyLowe, you can totally own those kids at the basketball shoot and skiball!!!!!! Win all their tokens and tickets and then clean up at the Prize Bar!!!!!!!!
    probably not. i have not been able to lift my arms since the duct tape and branding incident.

    i'm typing this with a coffee swizzle stick that is held in my teeth, by the way.

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