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Old 06-14-07, 01:53 PM   #1
ravenmore
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Squirrel goes on rampage; Injures 3

Hehe - must be a slow news day. Definitely best headline of the day:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070614/...OJeAmEsCIDW7oF
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Old 06-14-07, 01:56 PM   #2
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Another sign of the end times!
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Old 06-14-07, 02:03 PM   #3
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i have heard of this before. ummm... some squirrels somewhere in russia attacked and killed a dog, if i remember correctly...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4489792.stm

most of the links are a bit dated, but here's one
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Old 06-14-07, 02:06 PM   #4
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If you read the article, MOST of us are still safe. This squirrel seem to only attack people over the age of 70.

... Brad
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Old 06-14-07, 02:11 PM   #5
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If you read the article, MOST of us are still safe. This squirrel seem to only attack people over the age of 70.

... Brad
Sweet, that means I'm in the clear!
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Old 06-14-07, 02:37 PM   #6
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I noticed that too - d@mn punk German squirrels...
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Old 06-14-07, 02:45 PM   #7
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Don't laugh - they're making them bigger nowadays!

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Old 06-14-07, 02:49 PM   #8
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Don't laugh - they're making them bigger nowadays!


Ok, thats just awesome.
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Old 06-14-07, 02:49 PM   #9
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well.... now I guess we know why they drive so dang fast on the autobahn....they are trying to get away from these evil little things.
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Old 06-14-07, 02:50 PM   #10
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Oh noes!
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Old 06-14-07, 02:54 PM   #11
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Ok, thats just awesome.

eh, You're rochester too?
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Old 06-14-07, 03:01 PM   #12
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eh, You're rochester too?
You know it, it's the best place ever. Even better than Camelot, which is actually a rather silly place.
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Old 06-14-07, 03:05 PM   #13
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One good way to kill a problem squirrel is by taking it by the tail, and beating it back and forth against a tree until it stops moving.
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Old 06-14-07, 04:16 PM   #14
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I think this thread proves that squirrels could take over the world or at least be able to win the war in Iraq.
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Old 06-14-07, 04:19 PM   #15
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I bet if you understood Squirrelese, you would have heard "Hey guys, watch this!" softly in the distance right before the attack...
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Old 06-15-07, 05:50 AM   #16
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I don't know how many of you have heard this old song by Ray Stevens but....

The Mississippi Squirrel Revival

Well, when I was a kid I'd take a trip every summer down the Mississippi
To visit my granny in her antebellum world
I'd run barefooted all day long climbin' trees free as a song
And one day I happened to catch myself a squirrel
Well, I stuffed him down in an old shoe box, punched a couple of holes in the top
And when Sunday came I snuck him into Church
I was sittin' way back in the very last pew showin' him to my good buddy Hugh
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk
Well, what happened next is hard to tell
Some thought it was heaven others thought it was hell
But the fact that something was among us was plain to see
As the choir sang "I Surrender All" the squirrel ran up Harv Newlan's coveralls
Harv leaped to his feet and said, "Somethin's got a hold on me", Yeow!

Chorus

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Pascagoula
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' Hallelujah!

Well, Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'
Some thought he had religion others thought he had a demon
And Harv thought he had a weed eater loose in his Fruit-Of-The-Looms
He fell to his knees to plead and beg and the squirrel ran out of his britches leg
Unobserved to the other side of the room
All the way down to the amen pew where sat Sister Bertha better-than-you
Who'd been watchin' all the commotion with sadistic glee
But you should've seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs
She jumped to her feet and said "Lord have mercy on me"
As the squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess to sins that would make a sailor blush with shame
She told of gossip and church dissension but the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life and then she started naming names

Chorus

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' Hallelujah!

Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved,
Twenty-five thousand dollars was raised and fifty volunteered
For missions in the Congo on the spot
Even without an invitation there were at least five hundred rededications
And we all got baptized whether we needed it or not
Now you've heard the bible story I guess
How he parted the waters for Moses to pass
Oh the miracles God has wrought in this old world
But the one I'll remember 'til my dyin' day
Is how he put that Church back on the narrow way
With a half crazed Mississippi squirrel

Chorus

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Pascagoula
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They was jumpin' pews and shoutin' Hallelujah!
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Old 06-15-07, 06:42 AM   #17
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I thought this was going to be like this thread. Search BF for "squirrel fork" and there's a lot of reports.
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Old 06-15-07, 07:07 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by squegeeboo
You know it, it's the best place ever. Even better than Camelot, which is actually a rather silly place.
I spent about 33 years in Rochester and the fingerlakes. Here is an interesting thing for you. Many headhunters in different parts of the country don't like to hire people from Rochester because they usually end up moving back after a while.

Not a bad place, lots of great places to ride - when you aren't battling lake effect snow!

Oh, don't expect me to move back from a tropical paradise...
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Old 06-15-07, 07:23 AM   #19
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I spent about 33 years in Rochester and the fingerlakes. Here is an interesting thing for you. Many headhunters in different parts of the country don't like to hire people from Rochester because they usually end up moving back after a while.

Not a bad place, lots of great places to ride - when you aren't battling lake effect snow!

Oh, don't expect me to move back from a tropical paradise...
Ha, I was being a bit sarcastic, it's not bad, but I just came out for college, and could due with a bit more sunshine, although this year has been amazing so far with sunny days, and people say Global Warmings a bad thing.
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Old 06-15-07, 07:30 AM   #20
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I ran right over a squirrel the other da on my bike. It happened really fast and scared the heck out of me because of all the caught in the spokes stories. This little guy's timing was off for the spokes and I ran right over his head/neck. He scurried off into the trees, but I can't imagine he faired too well.
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