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  1. #1
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Crazy home defense ideas.

    Beside the typical alarms, cameras, guns and knives, what kind of practical home defense ideas do you have?

    For example, I know that rock hard frozen cornish game hen can knock an intruder out cold if you somehow make it to the freezer - they fit nicely in the hand and you can chuck them pretty good. Rice or beans thrown on the smooth kitchen floor in front of the bad guy becomes a slippery issue. Spraying Pam in the eyes also deters someone for a bit. Same as a handful of flour or sugar in the face.

    The kitchen is the best place to be, I tellya.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
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    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  2. #2
    '05 NUEser EJ123's Avatar
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    A 75+mw green laser. He sees that going towards his eye, I don't think he would want to almost become blind.

    Edit. One of those animal trap cages, where if they step on it, it clamps their leg.

  3. #3
    was kung-fu fighting lodi781's Avatar
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    fireextinguisher, especialy co2 or dry-chem. both very effective, and once depleted, they can still be thrown, so really getting 2 weapons for the price of one.
    " The love you withhold is the pain you carry, lifetime after lifetime."

  4. #4
    But on the road more MTBLover's Avatar
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    As far as stuff in the kitchen, there's always hot sauce. There's this stuff called Pure Cap- it's pure capsaicin, and at 500K Scoville units, there just isn't anything hotter. It will peel your skin off. And they make you sign a waiver when you buy it- good stuff, I tell ya. As to a delivery system, a pump spray bottle would probably work.

  5. #5
    Blasted Weeds Tude's Avatar
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    A Big Giant Maglite, gurl's best friend.

  6. #6
    MOLON LABE rabidchicken's Avatar
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    Big dog and a ***.

  7. #7
    MOLON LABE rabidchicken's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tude
    A Big Giant Maglite, gurl's best friend.
    That just sounds wrong.

  8. #8
    Air
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    Destroyer of Wheels Air's Avatar
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    My Dad grew up in Brooklyn at a time where it wasn't so safe. He had a 'friend' who didn't want anyone to steal his car so he put a splitter on the gas line - if you didn't hit a switch when you turned on the car the gas would spill onto the exhaust under the gas tank.

    Someone stole it. And they didn't make it far before it worked oh too well.

    The 'friend' was arrested soon after.

  9. #9
    Displaced Southerner polara426sh's Avatar
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    A can of lighter fluid and a road flare. Immolation is a pretty good deterrent.

  10. #10
    Senior Member scrapmetal's Avatar
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    I knew a girl who carried a photo flash in her purse for self defense. She even showed me one night how is it used, you just flash it in the face of the opponent (your eyes closed).

    It feels like being punched in the nose.
    Po všetkém hovno, enem po včelách med.

  11. #11
    ****** squegeeboo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tude
    A Big Giant Maglite, gurl's best friend.

    I can vouch for those being a guy's best friend also. Had to use a 6 D-Cell when I got jumped camping. Did the trick nicely.
    In the words of Einstein
    "And now I think I'll take a bath"

  12. #12
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    Attack Cats
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Quote Originally Posted by scrodzilla
    I'm going out on the town tonight and it won't be over until I snort a line of habanero seeds off the hood of a red Fiero.
    Words and Stuff.

  13. #13
    Giving you the business. Cypress's Avatar
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    "The dogs and the bees, and the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you"

    I sleep with a .40 1911, a 20ga shotgun, and .22 (for those long distance shots ) all within 6 feet of my head.

    It's not that I need them that close, it's just that's where they stay.
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    You have received an infraction at Bike Forums.

  14. #14
    MOLON LABE rabidchicken's Avatar
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    This is in my closet with some of his close friends:
    Last edited by rabidchicken; 06-19-07 at 02:05 PM.

  15. #15
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    16" barrel Mossberg Pump.

    Load is crushed glass and formic acid crystals. Ever been bit by a fire ant? That is 1 milligram of formic acid. My load contains 2.5 gr Formic Acid and the crushed glass does a good job of penetrating the skin and allowing the formic acid to instantly attack the peripheral nerves. Instant flooring of the attacker and instead of dying, he merely begs you to please kill him!
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  16. #16
    That darn Yankee TexasGuy's Avatar
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    Nothing beats the maglite flashlight by the head of your bed. There's also this shelf board that is not used that would probably seriously inflict some serious damage on somebody.
    Life is about hanging onto what you think is important and finding out what really is important.
    "Stop Ruining my joke!", "No, a joke implies humor attached at no additional cost"
    So many sayings, so little sig space.

  17. #17
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Stormcrowe
    16" barrel Mossberg Pump.

    Load is crushed glass and formic acid crystals. Ever been bit by a fire ant? That is 1 milligram of formic acid. My load contains 2.5 gr Formic Acid and the crushed glass does a good job of penetrating the skin and allowing the formic acid to instantly attack the peripheral nerves. Instant flooring of the attacker and instead of dying, he merely begs you to please kill him!

    Ouch!

  18. #18
    Displaced Southerner polara426sh's Avatar
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    I've got six bike frames in my room that I could use as weapons if the CZ 75 doesn't work.

  19. #19
    Senior Member
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    A loaded, and unlocked liquor cabinet.


    Why are you all so hostile and fearful that your homes will be invaded? Relax, enjoy life; give up the addiction to fear that is promoted by American media.
    "yes, they [investors, government, lobbyists] are all necessary, but they all need some rules and limitations as well."

    Mr. Markets, 6/27/09 7:07 pm

  20. #20
    Giving you the business. Cypress's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erraticrider
    A loaded, and unlocked liquor cabinet.


    Why are you all so hostile and fearful that your homes will be invaded? Relax, enjoy life; give up the addiction to fear that is promoted by American media.

    I don't fear for my own life. My main *** is for competition. Just so happens it makes a great "GTF out of my house, and never return" argument.
    Quote Originally Posted by Moderator
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    You have received an infraction at Bike Forums.

  21. #21
    Climbing Above It All BikeWNC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by polara426sh
    I've got six bike frames in my room that I could use as weapons if the CZ 75 doesn't work.
    CZ 75? Carl Zeiss 75mm? I would never throw that!

  22. #22
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erraticrider
    Why are you all so hostile and fearful that your homes will be invaded? Relax, enjoy life; give up the addiction to fear that is promoted by American media.

    Because:

    1. My house was broken into 4 times.

    2. One of those times I came home and surprised the intruder who had a metal pipe and was swinging it at me. My cousin was murdered when she came home to a burglar. Stabbed in her chest with her own butcher knife from her own kitchen. Then the guy went upstairs to get her room mates. But by then the cops were called.

    3. One time I was asleep when the burglar broke in. He came into my room and disconnected the phone at my nightstand by my head. Throughout this I stayed "asleep". I felt if I stirred, he would have killed me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  23. #23
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erraticrider
    A loaded, and unlocked liquor cabinet.


    Why are you all so hostile and fearful that your homes will be invaded? Relax, enjoy life; give up the addiction to fear that is promoted by American media.
    Who's afraid?

    I collect firearms as a hobby and since I happen to have them........
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  24. #24
    phony collective progress x136's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind
    For example, I know that rock hard frozen cornish game hen can knock an intruder out cold if you somehow make it to the freezer - they fit nicely in the hand and you can chuck them pretty good. Rice or beans thrown on the smooth kitchen floor in front of the bad guy becomes a slippery issue. Spraying Pam in the eyes also deters someone for a bit. Same as a handful of flour or sugar in the face.


    I'll second the Maglite as a backup. Them sum*****es pack a whallop, boy howdy. Even a small 2- or 3-cell will do, but the bigger ones have more range, obviously. I didn't even know there was a 6-cell Maglite. You could break someone's arm clean off with a good swing of one of those.

    Fire extinguisher probably isn't bad, either. Chemical burns or a bludgeon, take your pick!

    While I'm not currently a *** owner, if I were, someone violently entering my home and threatening myself or someone I know or love would be immediate grounds for forced lead poisoning, as far as I'm concerned. Keep in mind that violently entering my home is, in itself, plenty enough to constitute a threat.

    Also, a flamethrower with a tripwire trigger is alway fun. If they don't see the pilot light and very quickly understand the situation, they will soon.

  25. #25
    Giving you the business. Cypress's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind
    Because:

    1. My house was broken into 4 times.

    2. One of those times I came home and surprised the intruder who had a metal pipe and was swinging it at me. My cousin was murdered when she came home to a burglar. Stabbed in her chest with her own butcher knife from her own kitchen. Then the guy went upstairs to get her room mates. But by then the cops were called.

    3. One time I was asleep when the burglar broke in. He came into my room and disconnected the phone at my nightstand by my head. Throughout this I stayed "asleep". I felt if I stirred, he would have killed me.

    Wow. Get a dog. Or a ***. Or a dog that can shoot a ***.
    Quote Originally Posted by Moderator
    Dear Cypress,

    You have received an infraction at Bike Forums.

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