Hope this doesn't get me banned....my wife sent these to me
For all those men who say,
Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free.
Here's an update for you:
Now days, 80% of women are against marriage. WHY?
Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.
Men are like....
1. Men are like... Laxatives..They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like... Bananas... The older they get, the less firm they are
3. Men are like... Weather...Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like... Blenders... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like... Chocolate...Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like... Commercials. ..You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like... Department Stores... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like... Government Bonds... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like... Mascara...They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like... Popcorn...They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like... Lava Lamps..Fun to look at, but not very bright.
12. Men are like... Parking Spots... The good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.