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Thread: wood stretcher

  1. #1
    the actual el guapo atomship47's Avatar
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    wood stretcher

    my buddy has a cedar fence company. he's going to help me install a fence at "cost."

    i have a post hole digger. my buddy said i'll need a string level and a wood stretcher too.

    i've been to menards and home depot and they don't have a wood stretcher. anyone know where i can buy one?
    Compatibility:

    Your exact opposite is the Televangelist.

    Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Capitalist Pig, the Smartass, and the Sociopath.

  2. #2
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Hole diggers are old school. I have a box of Acme Instant Holes that I use.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  3. #3
    Third World Layabout crtreedude's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomship47 View Post
    my buddy has a cedar fence company. he's going to help me install a fence at "cost."

    i have a post hole digger. my buddy said i'll need a string level and a wood stretcher too.

    i've been to menards and home depot and they don't have a wood stretcher. anyone know where i can buy one?
    I think he is busting your chops. There is very little stretch in wood - now if you were putting up a barbed wire fence, that is another thing.

    But, in case he is serious - a come along would work fine to stretch just about anything. Of course, he might have just wanted a stretcher made of wood to haul your carcass away after you are finished putting up the fence.

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    I'd say he's either messin' with you. Or it's some sort of wood product....... NOT a contraption that stretches wood.

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  5. #5
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    Don't forget to get ten yards of power band, a left handed monkey wrench and a five gallon pail of steam... It helps with the stretching.

  6. #6
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Stacey, you left the sky hook off your list.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  7. #7
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    What, you expect ME to think of EVERYTHING?!?!?! <exasperated Stacey look>

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    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    Oh, a couple of feet of flight line to hold up that skyhook.

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    Senior Member dpb13's Avatar
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    Thankfully this thread was not about what I thought it was.
    Originally Posted by merider1
    By the time you got to the claspy thingy, I would have taught you plenty

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    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    Turn this|--| into this|---------|

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    Kicked out of the Webelos bluebottle1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dpb13 View Post
    Thankfully this thread was not about what I thought it was.
    ______________________________________________

    Kicked out of the Webelos.

  12. #12
    Kicked out of the Webelos bluebottle1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stacey View Post


    Turn this|--| into this|---------|
    Hey, I got an email about that just the other day! So is this what they meant?
    ______________________________________________

    Kicked out of the Webelos.

  13. #13
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    Helz yeah!

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    Grumpy Member trsidn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stacey View Post
    Oh, a couple of feet of flight line to hold up that skyhook.
    Don't forget the relative bearing grease and fallopian tubing.....
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariah View Post
    Transcendental enumeration.

  15. #15
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    This fence we're doing here, not plumbing. You're complicating things. <sigh>

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    Grumpy Member trsidn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stacey View Post
    This fence we're doing here, not plumbing. You're complicating things. <sigh>
    *smacks forhead*

    D'OH!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariah View Post
    Transcendental enumeration.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bluebottle1 View Post
    Hey, I got an email about that just the other day! So is this what they meant?
    Me too! How did they know I was in need??

  18. #18
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    Don't forget to go and ask for a long weight too.

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    Is this fence for penning snipe? You might need some salt, too.
    They told me to wear more lycra, and I said "no, no, no."

  20. #20
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Many boats are made of wood, and everyone wants a bigger boat, so I would check a marine supply store. If they have one, it will be next to the prop wash.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  21. #21
    Senior Member Michigander's Avatar
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    In almost 6 years of construction including fence installation, 8 years of woodworking, and 10 years of watching the New Yankee Work Shop, I've never heard of such a thing. You can re shape wood with steam in a container, but there is no way in hell you need to for fencing.

    I mean whatcha gonna do, take a 6 foot fence post and make it a 7 foot post?
    Bring back the Sig Test!


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  22. #22
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    ^^^ Don't mind 'im, 'es a wee bit slow.

  23. #23
    Senior Member skiahh's Avatar
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    Sheesh, leave poor atom alone! Everyone knows you need a wood stretcher to transport damaged wood to the wood doc if you, for example, make a bad cut... or have to remove a nail from a board... or something like that. The stretcher makes the damaged wood comfortable and, if necessary, provides the means to secure and stabilize it for transport and repair millwork!
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    Dog is my co-pilot 2manybikes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skiahh View Post
    Sheesh, leave poor atom alone! Everyone knows you need a wood stretcher to transport damaged wood to the wood doc if you, for example, make a bad cut... or have to remove a nail from a board... or something like that. The stretcher makes the damaged wood comfortable and, if necessary, provides the means to secure and stabilize it for transport and repair millwork!

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  25. #25
    Senior Member DannoXYZ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stacey View Post


    Turn this|--| into this|---------|
    So is that measured in inches or feet?

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