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Old 01-18-08, 11:16 PM   #1
lucky53s
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Write Your Own Obituary

Go ahead. What do you want to accomplish in life and how do you want to die?
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Old 01-18-08, 11:28 PM   #2
Tom Stormcrowe
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Being chased around my desk by an amorous coed, while teaching at Heidelberg and having a heart attack at the age of at least 130
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"We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant
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Old 01-19-08, 12:18 AM   #3
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Died at age 127 while being seduced by his 7th wife to drop the controls of his 2-seater Cessna and make love on the cockpit floor.
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- it's pretty well established that Hitler was an *******.
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Old 01-19-08, 12:22 AM   #4
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I would like to be treated with respect...and to be hit from behind by a vehicle traveling 70 + miles per hour as I ride to work on my Bianchi.
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Old 01-19-08, 12:33 AM   #5
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Go ahead. What do you want to accomplish in life and how do you want to die?
You're talking three different inquiries here.

1. My obituary: "He's dead."

2. How I want to die: With a smile on my face, of a heart attack, while being ravished by the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders.

3. What I want to accomplish: Well...okay...two inquiries. See my answer to number 2.
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Old 01-19-08, 12:35 AM   #6
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I would like to be treated with respect...and to be hit from behind by a vehicle traveling 70 + miles per hour as I ride to work on my Bianchi.
Don't you mean you want to rear end* a vehicle going 70 mph?
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Old 01-19-08, 01:23 AM   #7
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Chasing Dreams:
Dead. Prolific bum. Nothing of value to add.
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Old 01-19-08, 01:26 AM   #8
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He was loved.
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Old 01-19-08, 05:38 AM   #9
Sixty Fiver
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I just hope that when my time us up that I will have left this world a better place than what it was.

I would also like to go knowing that nothing was left unsaid.
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Old 01-19-08, 05:42 AM   #10
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- i want to be recycled and live on as body parts installed in dozens of others!
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Old 01-19-08, 06:21 AM   #11
Stacey
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Lived hard, died fast, and used her body for all it was worth.
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Old 01-19-08, 07:25 AM   #12
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Wore out this body from a full life, now off to a new adventure.
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"Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey
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Old 01-19-08, 08:02 AM   #13
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Tater Tot Hot dish, Aquavit, and Lutefisk: a deadly combination which caused the furnace of her home to combust in a fiery explosion Tuesday night. Had she only cracked open a window...
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Old 01-19-08, 06:21 PM   #14
msincredible
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No regrets
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Old 01-19-08, 06:27 PM   #15
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I like:

"He Was Loved Hard. He Loved Hard. He Will Be Missed."

Which really puts all this crap we call important into perspective. Other than a few nuts, no one is going to eulogize you on how well you did your job, more about how much you were disliked or something esoteric like that.
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Old 01-19-08, 06:31 PM   #16
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Inventor of the interplanetary bicycle dies at the age of 3,265 light years after collision with Steve Faucet near the planet formerly known as Pluto.
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Old 01-19-08, 06:42 PM   #17
banerjek
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lucky53s View Post
Go ahead. What do you want to accomplish in life and how do you want to die?
I figure if I make it to old age, things couldn't have been that bad. Somehow, getting taken out by a pack of wild dogs sounds like a decent way to go.
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Old 01-19-08, 06:47 PM   #18
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only 1 line is needed to make my obit. what it should be:
"He was a good freind."
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Old 01-19-08, 06:51 PM   #19
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So long, suckers!
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Old 01-19-08, 06:56 PM   #20
lucky53s
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Quote:
Originally Posted by banerjek View Post
I figure if I make it to old age, things couldn't have been that bad. Somehow, getting taken out by a pack of wild dogs sounds like a decent way to go.
Wait until you are chased down the road by wild dogs. It happens to us while we're out running all the time. I have actually had to mace one before. It's not as fun as it sounds.
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Old 01-19-08, 07:14 PM   #21
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I wouldnt know what to write for my own OB? I just hope to go with my wife and girls there with me to calm me on my way Its going to be given by my daughters and I have no clue what they will say as Im going to be dead! but I do know that I'm going for cremation, my family will take me to El Yunque Rain Forest in Puerto Rico where they will deposit my ashes and there I will become a part of the land from which I originated and when ever my family wants to see me all they have to do is fly on over and say "Hi" to the plants and animals that Ill be a part of How cool is that! It'll be good times

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You see, their morals, their code...it's a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these...These "civilized" people...they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve
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Old 01-19-08, 07:22 PM   #22
banerjek
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Quote:
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Wait until you are chased down the road by wild dogs. It happens to us while we're out running all the time. I have actually had to mace one before. It's not as fun as it sounds.
Actually, I've been chewed up by large dogs and have scars on my hands, arms, and legs. I know it would be a violent end, but I'd like to go fighting and I don't think I'd be traumatized even if a lot of pain would be involved.

Some ways of going are better than others. For example, I hate airplanes and would really hate to die in one that crashed even if no suffering were involved. I can't stand heights and wouldn't want to fall off a cliff even though that wouldn't hurt.

Getting flattened by a truck while riding my bike would not be my first choice, but it's better than any other kind of wreck or getting my life taken by some horrible disease. I just have this thing for dogs and would probably hold out pretty well until I fell and then one would hopefully get my neck and let the blood out pretty quickly.
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Old 01-19-08, 09:33 PM   #23
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With gusto, Pat died while in the sack with his lovers, The Olson Twins.

Pat will be terribly missed by The women's olympic hammer throw team.


or so I'm told it should say...
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Old 01-19-08, 11:46 PM   #24
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"Wasted too much time on the internet."
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Old 01-20-08, 03:12 PM   #25
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Quote:
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"Will someone please claim this body? It's starting to smell."
+1

- the ideal way to go is to have the check to the funeral home to bounce...

:-)
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