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Old 02-07-08, 10:57 AM   #1
substructure
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Things we humans do. But why?

Why is it that some people say, "Question," before asking a question? Is it going to be that much of a surprise?

Like:
“Hey, Bob, are you going to the game tonight?”
“Holy $#!*, Frank!! Warn me before you ask a question! You nearly floored me!”

And are we suppose to reply, “Answer,” before giving an answer?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:00 AM   #2
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I do. oops.


Answer: I do.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:02 AM   #3
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After a lady is done using the restroom, shouldn't she lift the seat for us men?
Why do we have to facilitate their needs?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:03 AM   #4
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When I get that I answer , "Seven!" before they get a chance to ask.

Yes, I am a smartass.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:04 AM   #5
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After a lady is done using the restroom, shouldn't she lift the seat for us men?
Why do we have to facilitate their needs?
You don't have bushes at your house?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:05 AM   #6
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After a lady is done using the restroom, shouldn't she lift the seat for us men?
Why do we have to facilitate their needs?
Why would you be taking a leak in the ladies room?

Dang it, I forgot to say question first.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:05 AM   #7
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a guy i work with insists on saying 'yeeess?' after every question he asks.

'Blah blah blah blah blah blah? yeeess?'

what's the point?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:05 AM   #8
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You don't have bushes at your house?
Yes, and I use them sometimes.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:07 AM   #9
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Do you ever notice that when you are walking up to a door a lot of times people will hold it for you. But sometimes you're sort of far away. So you have to trot to get there totally screwing up your current pace. Then you have to say thanks.

Thanks? For what? Making me run to the door and break a sweat? Yeah, thanks. Next time don't do me any favors. I can manage a friggin door by myself, pal.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:12 AM   #10
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Why would you be taking a leak in the ladies room?
I pay for this privilege.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:12 AM   #11
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Why is it that now when you go to a grocery store you wind up with as many plastic bags as you have items. People are afraid to bag things together. Back in the day, when we used paper, we could jam 3 dozen items in there and were proud of it. Now, when I tell the bagboy (and I use that term loosely) to put more items in the bag, he gets all anxious like he's mixing explosives together.

Listen, dimwit. If I wanted everything separate, I would just push the buggy out to my car and dump everything in my back seat.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:16 AM   #12
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LOL, I got yelled at by the store manager when I packed dozens of items in the paper bags. The old lady couldn't lift them! I also got yelled at for packing the bags too quickly. Go figure. (this was 1982 when there were still baggers)

Why is it the guy next to me sneezes and everyone says bless you, but he farts and no one says anything?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:21 AM   #13
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Why do we pull up to a traffic light at night, turn on the car's interior lights, and begin to flail about hysterically, like we are getting attacked by an invisible horde of rabid hornets?
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:24 AM   #14
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LOL, I got yelled at by the store manager when I packed dozens of items in the paper bags. The old lady couldn't lift them! I also got yelled at for packing the bags too quickly. Go figure. (this was 1982 when there were still baggers)

Why is it the guy next to me sneezes and everyone says bless you, but he farts and no one says anything?
I never say, "Bless you," anymore. Why should I? They should say, "WATCH OUT!" Before they sneeze. And apologize after.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:24 AM   #15
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Why do we pull up to a traffic light at night, turn on the car's interior lights, and begin to flail about hysterically, like we are getting attacked by an invisible horde of rabid hornets?
Drugs?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:25 AM   #16
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Why do we still like boobs even if we're lactose intolerant?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:25 AM   #17
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Why do we still like boobs even if we're lactose intolerant?
Most men wouldn't like boobs if we had them ourselves.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:26 AM   #18
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Most men wouldn't like boobs if we had them ourselves.
Troof
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Old 02-07-08, 11:27 AM   #19
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Have you ever noticed the person making that sucking noise because they have something between their teeth? Do they ever look for a toothpick? No, they continue to suck at it or pick it with the corner of a piece of paper.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:32 AM   #20
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Why do we stare in disgust at other people talking on cell phones instead of watching the road?
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Old 02-07-08, 11:35 AM   #21
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I never say, "Bless you," anymore. Why should I? They should say, "WATCH OUT!" Before they sneeze. And apologize after.
For years I have started using a made up word. Meant to sound kind of like "Gesundheit" as if it were another language phrase. I say GoodZugenburger.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:38 AM   #22
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Why is it that now when you go to a grocery store you wind up with as many plastic bags as you have items. People are afraid to bag things together. Back in the day, when we used paper, we could jam 3 dozen items in there and were proud of it. Now, when I tell the bagboy (and I use that term loosely) to put more items in the bag, he gets all anxious like he's mixing explosives together.

Listen, dimwit. If I wanted everything separate, I would just push the buggy out to my car and dump everything in my back seat.
I'm with you. I worked at a SouthEast (Florida only at the time) chain called Publix in high school. The weekend I started (1987) was the week they introduced their first plastic bags. I remember the manager having a meeting with all of us bag boys (and stock men who had to bag when it was busy) to show us the plastic bags.

The meeting showed us how to pack them so they didn't fold in on themselves (I guess that's not obvious if you're a moron or something). But I specifically remember him showing us how strong they were so we didn't pack them so light. He put 6 2-liter soda bottles in one bag, and then used a key to rip a bunch of small holes in the bag to show it still held.

Nowadays, they've changed the plastic bags though. Much cheaper and they rip super easy. I suspect baggers are afraid of the bags ripping if they put more than 12 oz. of item in a bag now a days.
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Old 02-07-08, 11:41 AM   #23
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How about the "thank you" that people say at work for almost EVERYTHING.

I go to someone's desk to report a problem they need to look at, they will end the conversation with THANK YOU. Just about every email, regardless of contents, ends with THANK YOU. Some even put "THANK YOU" in the sig of their email to keep them from having to type. After a conversation with any co-worker, regardless of what its about, they will often end it with THANK YOU.

Question: When did we start using THANK YOU all the time, and not when it was actually appropriate?
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Old 02-07-08, 12:02 PM   #24
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How about the "thank you" that people say at work for almost EVERYTHING.

I go to someone's desk to report a problem they need to look at, they will end the conversation with THANK YOU. Just about every email, regardless of contents, ends with THANK YOU. Some even put "THANK YOU" in the sig of their email to keep them from having to type. After a conversation with any co-worker, regardless of what its about, they will often end it with THANK YOU.

Question: When did we start using THANK YOU all the time, and not when it was actually appropriate?
Answer: I don't know. Because I don't say it a lot. But thank you anyway.
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Old 02-07-08, 12:12 PM   #25
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Why do people ask "How are you?" and then don't wait for an answer?

Why do some people pluralize words by adding an apostrophe?
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