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Thread: cocaine

  1. #1
    Banned formula4's Avatar
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    cocaine

    guy at work- makes fun of chubby and fat people in front of others. cant turn down a challenge because he is too badazz, hethniks.



    he called me some sort of fatty name i front of others


    so i figure, he has no idea what i can do on a bike, why dont i 'challenge' him to a race since hes in such greatttt shape?

    of course, he was happy and agreed to destroy me! he kept laughing because he knows he will win

    however

    does he realize i am a time trial specialist?

    does he realize the agony that awaits him?

    "normal" people that know nothing of the cycling world that race someone such as i must be ready to look very stupid.

    for i will

    eat oreas

    orea

    oreos

    mmmmmmmmmmmm

    animals!

  2. #2
    Banned formula4's Avatar
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    make that.

    into

    viaaaaaaaa

    mass transit!

  3. #3
    POWERCRANK addict markhr's Avatar
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    kick his ass
    shameless POWERCRANK plug
    Recommended reading for all cyclists - Cyclecraft - Effective Cycling
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    Don't run red lights, wear a helmet, use hand signals, get some cycle lights(front and rear) and, FFS, don't run red lights!

  4. #4
    The quieter you become... Falkon's Avatar
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    What the hell was that?
    Quote Originally Posted by TechKnowGN
    San Jose has to be the most boring place I've ever been. And I live in Ohio.

  5. #5
    Senior Member barba's Avatar
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    cocaine?

  6. #6
    Lanky Lass East Hill's Avatar
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    So, when's the race?

    Can we put down bets?

    East Hill
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    TRY EMPATHY & HAVE LOVE IN YOUR HEART, PERHAPS I'LL SEE YOU ON THE ROAD...

  7. #7
    Senior Member ravenmore's Avatar
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    I don't get the thread title, but good luck.
    Ravenmore's Pictures
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    Mean people are like slinkys. They're really not worth much but still are rather entertaining to watch tumble down the stairs.

  8. #8
    1/2 man,1/2 bear,1/2 pig ManBearPig's Avatar
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    does this guy own a bike?
    ...

  9. #9
    Lanky Lass East Hill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Towlie View Post
    does this guy own a bike?
    A Scott Speedster...

    East Hill
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    TRY EMPATHY & HAVE LOVE IN YOUR HEART, PERHAPS I'LL SEE YOU ON THE ROAD...

  10. #10
    Squirrelly Member trsidn's Avatar
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    If you wanna hang out youve got to take her out; cocaine.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Yet more proof that I'm.. well, pretty much right about everything.

  11. #11
    Studs Terkel Johnny_Monkey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by formula4 View Post
    guy at work- makes fun of chubby and fat people in front of others. cant turn down a challenge because he is too badazz, hethniks.



    he called me some sort of fatty name i front of others


    so i figure, he has no idea what i can do on a bike, why dont i 'challenge' him to a race since hes in such greatttt shape?

    of course, he was happy and agreed to destroy me! he kept laughing because he knows he will win

    however

    does he realize i am a time trial specialist?

    does he realize the agony that awaits him?

    "normal" people that know nothing of the cycling world that race someone such as i must be ready to look very stupid.

    for i will

    eat oreas

    orea

    oreos

    mmmmmmmmmmmm

    animals!

    Did you win?

  12. #12
    Senior Member rando's Avatar
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    all your blow are belong to us!
    "Think of bicycles as rideable art that can just about save the world". ~Grant Petersen

    Cyclists fare best when they recognize that there are times when acting vehicularly is not the best practice, and are flexible enough to do what is necessary as the situation warrants.--Me

  13. #13
    don't misunderestimate me BoSoxYacht's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by barba View Post
    cocaine?
    I'm not a big fan of it, but I like the way it smells.

  14. #14
    Fourth Degree Legend junkyard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by barba View Post
    cocaine?
    She don't lie;
    She don't lie;
    She don't lie;
    Cocaine.
    Quote Originally Posted by dminor View Post
    The caveat with a strap-on, of course, is you will have to get creative with a couple of lock cables and an anchor point

  15. #15
    Banned formula4's Avatar
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    Him and I shall race in a few weeks I'm sure.

    I will let him use my denali with MTB gearing, since hes soooo good it wont matter anyway, right? He just said "any bike."


    Not a chance he's getting on my Scott.

  16. #16
    Sheik Yerbouti voldemort's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by formula4 View Post
    guy at work- makes fun of chubby and fat people in front of others. cant turn down a challenge because he is too badazz, hethniks.



    he called me some sort of fatty name i front of others


    so i figure, he has no idea what i can do on a bike, why dont i 'challenge' him to a race since hes in such greatttt shape?

    of course, he was happy and agreed to destroy me! he kept laughing because he knows he will win

    however

    does he realize i am a time trial specialist?

    does he realize the agony that awaits him?

    "normal" people that know nothing of the cycling world that race someone such as i must be ready to look very stupid.

    for i will

    eat oreas

    orea

    oreos

    mmmmmmmmmmmm

    animals!
    Two options...1) bury him right off the line, subsequently making it clear it was effortless on your part. 2)Make it long enough that you can check out his riding ability, then sandbag a little by giving him a lead while you're huffing and puffing. Then when he starts talking smack, DROP HIS ASS. And maybe have an audience of coworkers to watch.
    Suzy Creamcheese, what's got into you?

  17. #17
    . botto's Avatar
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    did you wear your lampre kit for the challenge?


  18. #18
    Banned formula4's Avatar
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    Audience of coworkers... thats my goal! and i would like to match his pace for 7 miles or so, and then the last 3 i will just completely and totally annihilate him.

  19. #19
    Immoderator KrisPistofferson's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by formula4 View Post

    does he realize i am a time trial specialist?
    Are you?

  20. #20
    Packfodding 3 caloso's Avatar
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    Just sit in. If he thinks he's a badass, he'll probably try to take the lead. Let him. Suck wheel and then pull around in the final 50m.
    Cyclists of the world, unite! You have nothing to lube but your chains!

  21. #21
    BF's Level 12 Wizard SingingSabre's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by caloso View Post
    Just sit in. If he thinks he's a badass, he'll probably try to take the lead. Let him. Suck wheel and then pull around in the final 50m.
    That's mint. I like that idea the best!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bklyn
    Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.

  22. #22
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    that's a very good song

  23. #23
    carbon positive lifestyle carbonlife's Avatar
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    Definitely sandbag! Let him lead, let him be cocky, push him a little to make sure he's riding at his limit, then about two miles from the finish, drop him like a rock. By the time he finishes you will already be completely recovered. Make sure there is an audience at the finish! Make sure betting is involved!

    I did this years ago. A co-worker had lost a lot of weight at the gym on the bicycle machine and thought he was bad-ass. I knew the gym was no substitute for real riding so I challenged him to an out-and-back race on a bike path (about 15 miles). I was on a mountain bike, no suspension but it had knobby tires. I let him set the pace, about 20 mph. Within 5 minutes I knew I was going to win. His breathing was already elevated and I could tell he could not sustain the pace; he didn't know what he was doing. Near the turn-around point, the path turned into the wind and I left him in the dust and waited for him at the turnaround point. He went past me and lingered a few minutes about 30 yards away. As he came back I thought he was going to stop, but he flew past at full speed. Took me a mile or so to catch up with him, but again he was going at an unsustainable pace. About two miles from the end the path turned into the wind again and I left him in the dust. By the time he got to the finish I was completely recovered, my breathing was normal, heart beat was a little over resting. Ten minutes later we were back at the office and I looked at him and his face was still red and breathing a bit hard. I said "Are you OK?" and he said "Yeah I'm fine" but it was obvious he was still suffering.

    The take home message: it is fun to punish ignorant cockiness. It's one thing to be a real bad-ass but insufferable, quite another to be an idiot who needs to be put in his place.

  24. #24
    Senior Member eric von zipper's Avatar
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    Eat some of these beofore you race.



    Saw this over at crazyguyonabike today and felt like it would be wrong not to post it here.
    original page:
    http://www.crazyguyonabike.com/doc/p..._id=71844&v=3T
    Surly Cross Check, Thorn Sherpa

  25. #25
    carbon positive lifestyle carbonlife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by eric von zipper View Post
    Eat some of these before you race.
    Love the logo of the Peruvian girl. Like Red Bull, it gives you wings!

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