Cycling and bicycle discussion forums. 
   Click here to join our community Log in to access your Control Panel  


Go Back   > >

Foo Off-Topic chit chat with no general subject.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 03-25-08, 01:15 PM   #1
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
I hate my new girlfriend...

We had our first date on Thursday morning (I guess she's an early riser) and I found out immediately that she's not much for small talk and likes to get right down to business.

She also has a mean streak and despite being pretty petite she proceeded to beat the ever loving crap out of me and forced me into some really un-natural positions... by the time she was done I couldn't feel my legs.

And some of you are already thinking this sounds like a good thing...

I didn't see her over the long weekend as I really needed the time to get the feeling back in my extremities but saw her again this morning and again, she wanted to put me in un-natural positions... it's a good thing I'm pretty flexible and have some great stamina for an old guy.

Because the beating wasn't good enough she then decided to stick a bunch of needles in me and I feel rather guilty in admitting this... I actually liked it.

We'll be doing this all over again tomorrow and I figure that we're gonna have to break up in about three weeks... as that is when the physiotherapy and rehabilitation is supposed to finish.

I am so gonna need painkillers as we're just getting warmed up.

At least they let me ride the trainer...
Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:17 PM   #2
mude
Baned.
 
mude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Bikes:
Posts: 3,992
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i giggled.
__________________
5000
mude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:18 PM   #3
flyingscotsman
Nothing here to see!!!!!!
 
flyingscotsman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Charlotte
Bikes:
Posts: 489
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
You will grow to love the B*tch
flyingscotsman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:18 PM   #4
ModoVincere
Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour
 
ModoVincere's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Bikes:
Posts: 1,675
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
pics or it didn't happen.

__________________
1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold
ModoVincere is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:21 PM   #5
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
I'll see if I can post the MRI results for ya.
Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:37 PM   #6
jsharr
You Know!? For Kids!
 
jsharr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
Bikes: '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa
Posts: 6,157
Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
I am glad you do not have a hernia.
__________________
Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
Quote:
Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
jsharr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:48 PM   #7
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by flyingscotsman View Post
You will grow to love the B*tch
No... I really can't see this working out in the long term.

A. She's blonde.

and

B. She doesn't ride a bike.
Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:50 PM   #8
MTBLover
But on the road more
 
MTBLover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Bikes: Bianchi Volpe '07
Posts: 864
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
No... I really can't see this working out in the long term.

A. She's blonde.

and

B. She doesn't ride a bike.

Wait... what????? I thought you were talking about a bike!
MTBLover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:51 PM   #9
ModoVincere
Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour
 
ModoVincere's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Bikes:
Posts: 1,675
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
I am glad you do not have a hernia.
Would you rather it be a hemmoroid? (sp?)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
No... I really can't see this working out in the long term.

A. She's blonde.

and

B. She doesn't ride a bike.
Dude, you have 3 more weeks to convert her to riding a bike...and blondes can be fun.
__________________
1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold
ModoVincere is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:51 PM   #10
substructure
RustyTainte
 
substructure's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: 28012
Bikes: zilch
Posts: 12,343
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
No... I really can't see this working out in the long term.

A. She's blonde.

and

B. She doesn't ride a bike.
Two great tastes that taste great together.

She will rule you on the bike, man. Don't invite her into that world.


Plus, I tingled after reading your first post :blush: My wife is Plain Jane until I get her half drunk and there's access to porn that she likes.
substructure is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:54 PM   #11
lisarmarshall
Senior Member
 
lisarmarshall's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Bikes:
Posts: 65
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


I was jealous for a couple of seconds..... wait, maybe I shouldn't admit that....
lisarmarshall is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 01:57 PM   #12
CyLowe97
Up on the Down Side
 
CyLowe97's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago(ish)
Bikes:
Posts: 6,330
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Remember: Keep Your Crank Out Of The Crank.

Very Important.



Edit.... wait, you're not talking about a bike? This thread is confusing.
CyLowe97 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:17 PM   #13
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
Okay... bike stuff.

I did get to do a VO2 test today and Dan, the exercise therapist (and former racer) was a little rocked as even when he loaded up the machine he couldn't get me to hit my max heart rate (178 based my age) and my blood pressure spiked at 130/80... it was 110/70 when I started.

We talked a lot about riding and back injuries and how riding a fixed gear really helps when you don't have as much feeling / strength in one leg due to a nerve impingement.

I am actually looking forward to going in tomorrow as I have things to do that don't involve blonde girls who don't ride bikes and expect that eventually, there will be less pain and more progress.
Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:20 PM   #14
CliftonGK1
Senior Member
 
CliftonGK1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Columbus, OH
Bikes: '08 Surly Cross-Check, 2011 Redline Conquest Pro, 2012 Spesh FSR Comp EVO, 2015 Trek Domane 6.2 disc
Posts: 11,380
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I got this far:
"She also has a mean streak and despite being pretty petite she proceeded to beat the ever loving crap out of me and forced me into some really un-natural positions... by the time she was done I couldn't feel my legs."
and thought you were talking about being forced to ride a TT bike.
__________________
"I feel like my world was classier before I found cyclocross."
- Mandi M.
CliftonGK1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:21 PM   #15
Tom Stormcrowe
Out fishing with Annie on his lap, a cigar in one hand and a ginger ale in the other, watching the sunset.
 
Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: South Florida
Bikes: Techna Wheelchair and a Sun EZ 3 Recumbent Trike
Posts: 16,119
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
or what happened to me?

On that topic, why do proctologists all have hands like Virginia hams?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
Would you rather it be a hemmoroid? (sp?)




Dude, you have 3 more weeks to convert her to riding a bike...and blondes can be fun.
__________________
. “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

"We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant
Tom Stormcrowe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:25 PM   #16
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
Tom... as one of the really stoned guys I can't really tell you why proctologists have hands like Virginia hams as that falls into Cuda's area of expertise.

I can tell you that the thought of ham is making me hungry.
Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:27 PM   #17
ModoVincere
Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour
 
ModoVincere's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Bikes:
Posts: 1,675
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
Tom... as one of the really stoned guys I can't really tell you why proctologists have hands like Virginia hams as that falls into Cuda's area of expertise.

I can tell you that the thought of ham is making me hungry.
hmm...ham, hemmoroids, and Tom's escapade.
I'm sensing a common thread at the moment
__________________
1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold
ModoVincere is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:34 PM   #18
Lamplight
Senior Member
 
Lamplight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Bellingham, WA
Bikes:
Posts: 2,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Most of that you may be able to learn to love, but the not riding a bike thing...that's just not going to work. I had a rather large but friendly lady stab me in the hiney with two needles today which she promptly massaged a little to ease the pain (I guess). It helped, so I now love her.
Lamplight is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:38 PM   #19
Sixty Fiver
Bicycle Repair Man !!!
Thread Starter
 
Sixty Fiver's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: YEG
Bikes: See my sig...
Posts: 27,264
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 10 Post(s)
So LL... when do we get to meet her ?

And does she ride a bike ?

Sixty Fiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:40 PM   #20
Lamplight
Senior Member
 
Lamplight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Bellingham, WA
Bikes:
Posts: 2,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
So LL... when do we get to meet her ?

And does she ride a bike ?


I seriously doubt she rides a bike. And, despite loving her for sticking me, I would like to avoid her place of business as much as possible!
Lamplight is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:41 PM   #21
Suttree
some new kind of kick
 
Suttree's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Smog Valley
Bikes: SOMA Rush, Miyata 912, Kogswell Mod. G, want a porteur bike
Posts: 1,541
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
we should all be so lucky to have a nice girl to beat us up

stop bragging fiver--

Last edited by Suttree; 03-25-08 at 02:49 PM.
Suttree is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 02:49 PM   #22
bluebottle1
Kicked out of the Webelos
 
bluebottle1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Bikes:
Posts: 239
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tom Stormcrowe View Post
On that topic, why do proctologists all have hands like Virginia hams
OOOOHHHH! Wave off! Wave off!

DAMMIT! Image formed! Scarred for life!
__________________
______________________________________________

Kicked out of the Webelos.
bluebottle1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 04:31 PM   #23
East Hill
Lanky Lass
 
East Hill's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Take a deep breath, and ask--What would Sheldon do?
Bikes: Nishiki Nut! International, Pro, Olympic 12, Sport mixte, and others too numerous to mention.
Posts: 21,455
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
You are breaking the hearts of all the women of Foo .

You need to stick to bikey babes !

East Hill
__________________
___________________________________________________
TRY EMPATHY & HAVE LOVE IN YOUR HEART, PERHAPS I'LL SEE YOU ON THE ROAD...
East Hill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 05:50 PM   #24
Siu Blue Wind
Flowers for mom
 
Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Bikes:
Posts: 11,013
Mentioned: 6 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 153 Post(s)
I thought you like dark haired women.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buddha
We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
Quote:
Originally Posted by making View Post
Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
Siu Blue Wind is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-25-08, 05:53 PM   #25
weltall82
kicker of elves
 
weltall82's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: PDX
Bikes: '07 steamroller (grey)
Posts: 46
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
this thread is golden.
weltall82 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:34 AM.