1. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
2. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
4. Never lick a steak knife.
5. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
6. Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic
7. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
8. Don't worry about what people think; they don't do it very often.
9. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
10. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.