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Old 05-02-08, 08:41 AM   #1
ModoVincere
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Sharks

A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday, so during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. 'I will give anything they desire of mine, to the man who swims across that pool.'

So the party continues with no events in the pool, until suddenly, there is a great splash and all the guests of the
party run to the pool to see what has happened.

In the pool is a man and he is swimming as hard as he can, and the fins come out of the water and the jaws are snapping and this guy just keeps on going and the sharks are gaining on him and this guy reaches the end and he gets out of the pool, tired and soaked.

The millionaire grabs the microphone and says, 'I am a man of my word, anything of mine I will give, my Ferraris, my house, absolutely anything, for you are the bravest man I have ever seen. So sir what will it be?' the millionaire asks.

The guy grabs the microphone and says, 'Why don't we start with the name of the ******* that pushed me in!'
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Old 05-02-08, 08:50 AM   #2
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Hey isn't there a joke forum?

A guy moves up to Alaska and enters a bar. He notices all the regulars give him dirty looks, so he walks up to them and says, "what's up guys?"
They glare at him and say, "Don't talk to us, stranger. You aren't an Alaskan". The man frowns and says, "Sure I am, I live here, Just moved up!" The regulars shake their heads, "No no. That's not enough to make you a real Alaskan."
The guy asks, "So okay, what do I have to do then? What makes me a real Alaskan?"
The bar patrons all look at each other, then finally one speaks up, "Well, there's three things you gotta do. Number 1 - you gotta stay out all night in the wilderness, by yourself, with no food or water; number 2, you gotta kill a bear barehanded, and number 3, you gotta have sex with an Eskimo chick!"

The man blinks and then shrugs, "That sounds weird, but whatever, I'm game." So he goes out that very night and wanders into the heart of the wilderness. The next morning he comes back, freezing and starving but alive. The men say "Alright not bad, but you still got two more challenges ahead of you!" So he goes out again that night into the wilderness.

When he returns, he is almost completely naked, and covered in deep scratches and blood; his face is bruised and his hair is askew. He walks funny and limps. The guys all look at each other, impressed, and finally one of them pipes up, 'So how did it go?'

The man says, "I don't wanna talk about it. So where is this Eskimo chick I'm supposed to kill?"
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Old 05-02-08, 08:53 AM   #3
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yes there is...I'm an idiot who didn't take the time to check which window I was posting in...but what the heck...let's have a fun thread too, instead of just political issues or religious discussions/bashing.



edited....Mods....can't live withem, can't live with out them...and apparently some like to play with threads while the move them!
Ps...thanks for moving it.
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Old 05-02-08, 09:01 AM   #4
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....
The guy grabs the microphone and says, 'Why don't we start with the name of the ******* that pushed me in!'
Does the millionaire own the ******* who pushed the swimmer into the pool?
.
Is this a slave owning society? Or perhaps they have a consensual dom/sub relationship thats recognised by the swimmer.
.
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Old 05-03-08, 12:30 AM   #5
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Does the millionaire own the ******* who pushed the swimmer into the pool?
.
Is this a slave owning society? Or perhaps they have a consensual dom/sub relationship thats recognised by the swimmer.
.
^ Funnier than the actual joke.
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Old 05-03-08, 11:35 AM   #6
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So I herd thar wer sharks in here.
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Old 05-03-08, 02:45 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Weeks View Post
Hey isn't there a joke forum?

A guy moves up to Alaska and enters a bar. He notices all the regulars give him dirty looks, so he walks up to them and says, "what's up guys?"
They glare at him and say, "Don't talk to us, stranger. You aren't an Alaskan". The man frowns and says, "Sure I am, I live here, Just moved up!" The regulars shake their heads, "No no. That's not enough to make you a real Alaskan."
The guy asks, "So okay, what do I have to do then? What makes me a real Alaskan?"
The bar patrons all look at each other, then finally one speaks up, "Well, there's three things you gotta do. Number 1 - you gotta stay out all night in the wilderness, by yourself, with no food or water; number 2, you gotta kill a bear barehanded, and number 3, you gotta have sex with an Eskimo chick!"

The man blinks and then shrugs, "That sounds weird, but whatever, I'm game." So he goes out that very night and wanders into the heart of the wilderness. The next morning he comes back, freezing and starving but alive. The men say "Alright not bad, but you still got two more challenges ahead of you!" So he goes out again that night into the wilderness.

When he returns, he is almost completely naked, and covered in deep scratches and blood; his face is bruised and his hair is askew. He walks funny and limps. The guys all look at each other, impressed, and finally one of them pipes up, 'So how did it go?'

The man says, "I don't wanna talk about it. So where is this Eskimo chick I'm supposed to kill?"

booooooo.... people who don't like to walk on eggshells and just step on toes whenever they feel like it - need to come up with their own jokes... or at least give the credit where credit's due when they 'appropriate' the jokes of others.. -real talk. I'm barakah obama and I approve this message. absolutely.
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Old 05-03-08, 04:18 PM   #8
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sharks are scum
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Old 05-03-08, 10:44 PM   #9
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sharks are scum
...sounds like the Stars lost...
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Old 05-03-08, 11:50 PM   #10
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So I herd thar wer sharks in here.
How did I know Fuzzy would stop in on this thread?
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