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  1. #1
    Domestic Domestique UnsafeAlpine's Avatar
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    Ex's as friends?

    i have 5 very, very close friends. People I can really count on, people I love (in a platonic way), people I would do anything for and who would do anything for me. 3 of them are ex girlfriends. Is that weird?

  2. #2
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Not at all. One of my ex girlfriends used to hook me up with dates quite a lot. She also used to cut my wife's hair, but only after I introduced by wife to her.

    I met my wife through another ex girlfriend.

    I keep one ex in the freezer, in zip lock baggies. She never talks to me as she is frigid.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  3. #3
    superArti artifice's Avatar
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    I don't think its weird at all. I don't have a lot of ex's as friends (perhaps a reflection of me) but I think it was my poor judgement in their character from the start. If you choose good people to date, and the dating part just doesn't work out, no sense in not maintaining a friendship! I'm kinda jealous, actually. One of my good friends/ex was probably also one of my best friends for the longest time.

  4. #4
    Blasted Weeds Tude's Avatar
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    Not at all.

    I get along with ex-husband - but I think he may have even moved to South Carolina - I really don't see him.

    And ex-boyfriend - we're back to being the platonic friends we started out as. Muuuuch better that way too!

  5. #5
    Portland Fred banerjek's Avatar
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    Nothing weird about it at all. The reason you got together in first place is that you obviously had something in common.

  6. #6
    Body By Nintendo Psydotek's Avatar
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    Do these ex's come with "benefits"?

    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    ...I keep one ex in the freezer, in zip lock baggies. She never talks to me as she is frigid.
    Next to your coffee?

    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.

  7. #7
    Blasted Weeds Tude's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Psydotek View Post
    Do these ex's come with "benefits"?



    Next to your coffee?


    Ahh, Do not want!

  8. #8
    Gears? CliftonGK1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by banerjek View Post
    Nothing weird about it at all. The reason you got together in first place is that you obviously had something in common.
    The reasons we're not together far outweigh why we got together in the first place. I don't talk to any of my exes.

  9. #9
    que deporte! naujcdl's Avatar
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    I haven't made friends "after" dating with exes, just didn't have a normal breakup, it is sad in a way, but it is part of the past.

    Maybe how i took their no trust, and main reason: cheating, led me to care less than .02 cents about them.

    Single forever...sigh.
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  10. #10
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CliftonGK1 View Post
    The reasons we're not together far outweigh why we got together in the first place. I don't talk to any of my exes.
    Mine don't talk to me.

  11. #11
    ReMember trsidn's Avatar
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    I don't think it's weird. Not all relationships end in a spectacular explosion.

    Now, I don't talk to my ex-wife. That woman still scares me.
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    And Jseis said, "Let him that isn't stoned commit the first sin."

  12. #12
    don't misunderestimate me BoSoxYacht's Avatar
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    My closest friend is a woman I dated for about a year. She's now remarried to the father of their children, but we've remained friends. She lives in Tennessee now, but when we get to visit each other she stays on my boat, or I stay at her home.

    Her husband knows we were an item once, but he completely trusts us both. Some friendships appear strange to those not involved in it.

  13. #13
    1/2 man,1/2 bear,1/2 pig ManBearPig's Avatar
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    I remained friends with an ex I dated longer than any other. We just knew each other too well and couldn't separate, even long after all romance was gone (currently, we could be stranded on a desert island and nothing would happen). It is very rare to know someone that well, that they know what you are thinking, know all of your quirks, and accept you completely.

    However, as it was pointed out to me not too long ago -- the problem with exes is not between the exes, but others who get romantically involved. So, for example, after 4 years of being buds with my ex, she has now finally started dating someone seriously, to the point that we just don't talk at all. Just because she and I are OK with being friends, you can't expect the current s.o. to just accept that the ex is still coming around...particularly when there is a romantic history between the two.
    ...

  14. #14
    que deporte! naujcdl's Avatar
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    Well said, people tend to wonder who that person is or what was the involvement, it is a natural thing, that jealous syndrome, i call it, but if you are good about it and trust is built, it don't bother much.
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  15. #15
    Warrior Cyclist cycle17's Avatar
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    I've parted friends with a few of my exs. My ex wife however...well let's just say...I hope I never see here again.
    Just Do It..

  16. #16
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    I still live with my ex... I would not say we are friends or even get along that well.

    This will be changing very soon.

  17. #17
    Fourth Degree Legend junkyard's Avatar
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    Not friends with any of them. It has been my experience that it often isn't fair to both parties. The one doing the breaking up says that they want to remain friends to soften the blow. The one getting broken up with maintains a false hope that something more might come out of remaining friends. In the end, I think it takes longer to get over the situation. Maybe in time, friendship can come out of it. But not immediately following. I think both parties need time to move on and adjust.
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  18. #18
    moving target c0urt's Avatar
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    i am friends with most of my exes.
    like someone said. you had something in common

    plus they have seen you naked, can it get worse from there?
    Last edited by c0urt; 07-07-08 at 11:49 AM.
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  19. #19
    Senior Member ravenmore's Avatar
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    I've only ever stayed friends with one ex, and that was because we were friends for over a decade before we dated.

    Too many hurt feelings and its hard/weird seeing them move on. No thanks. Better to just go.
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  20. #20
    GATC
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  21. #21
    been around the block SourDieseL's Avatar
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    i dated one of my best friends, she knew me the best and unfortunately it didn't work out. I miss her as a friend and hope that one day we'll go back to being great friends again. It's tough not being in her life, but I guess part of that is realizing we shouldn't have stepped into it in the first place.

  22. #22
    carbon positive lifestyle carbonlife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UnsafeAlpine View Post
    ...3 of them are ex girlfriends. Is that weird?
    Not weird, enviable even, but it makes me wonder why you are so bitter/miserable about the last one when you have all these others who will lend a sympathetic ear or otherwise slap you to your senses.

    I was friendly with all my exes but I've remained very close to just one of them, and it's awesome. At first it was fine, then it got rough for me when she started seeing someone seriously, then we made up before she got married, now we are very close, and her husband is totally cool with us hanging out alone, so we can talk. There's nothing between us except warmth and understanding. There's a closeness that just can't be duplicated with someone you have always been platonic with. In a way it's an ideal relationship: almost all the emotional closeness without the drama and expectation of a romantic relationship.

    .

  23. #23
    Domestic Domestique UnsafeAlpine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carbonlife View Post
    Not weird, enviable even, but it makes me wonder why you are so bitter/miserable about the last one when you have all these others who will lend a sympathetic ear or otherwise slap you to your senses.

    I was friendly with all my exes but I've remained very close to just one of them, and it's awesome. At first it was fine, then it got rough for me when she started seeing someone seriously, then we made up before she got married, now we are very close, and her husband is totally cool with us hanging out alone, so we can talk. There's nothing between us except warmth and understanding. There's a closeness that just can't be duplicated with someone you have always been platonic with. In a way it's an ideal relationship: almost all the emotional closeness without the drama and expectation of a romantic relationship.

    .
    This last one was totally different than all the others, and, oddly enough, I think that it's so tough is because it ended quicker than any of my other relationships and really never had a chance to even out. We were still in that exciting stage and then it was over.

  24. #24
    Barbieri Telefonico huhenio's Avatar
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    No ex's live nearby.

    All ex's are potentially .. .well ... you get it.
    Giving Haircuts Over The Phone

  25. #25
    Wood Licker Maelstrom's Avatar
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    I think so, I am incapable being "friends" with ex's. It never seems to work out.

    And this isn't always my fault, its usually mutual.

    Of course I am talking relationships, or something that I might have had with some meaning. Sex partners, meh, ya I can be friends with them. Accidental sex with them is proven to be fleeting and fun.

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