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Old 07-17-08, 10:12 AM   #1
rat_factory
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Cycling fumblyness FAIL

Ok so I'm doing my daily ride yesterday and I come open a slow group ride made up of mostly young 20-something riders. These women were really really attractive . I pass them and later I'm resting at the cul-de-sac before turning around. They finally make it in chatting and glancing my way. I had already been there for a few minutes already so I decide to take off. So one girl smiles at me and I smile back, then the other girls turn around to see who she is smiling at. I'm already on my bike, but apparently I didn't downshift when I stopped and was in a huge gear, so I was going so slow I felt as if I was about to fall over. Then I couldn't clip in right. Then I had to ride past them, fumbling and looking like I've never ridden a bike in my life. About 5 seconds into my ride my keys and cell phone promptly eject themselves from my saddlebag and hit the road. Then they pass me half giggling, half wondering why I was out there in the first place I'm sure.

Anything like this ever happen to you guys? Why does this only happen when hot girls are around? AGGGGGGGHHH!

Abort? retry? FAIL!

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Old 07-17-08, 10:13 AM   #2
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Retry. Always retry.
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A girl once asked me to give her twelve inches and make it hurt. I had to make love to her 3 times and then punch her in the nose.
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Old 07-17-08, 10:42 AM   #3
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hehe, not in front an mens, I usually do stuff like that at a stoplight at a busy intersection. Yup, there's me I look good standing there with my bike. And here we go - got a green light ---- OK foot slips and doesn't clip in, little wobbily - hit major pothole ---- front headlight pops off and is hanging by the cord ---- I quickly pull over to side of road to retrieve light - and hit curb and scrap along it - nearly toppling over as I'm still clipped in.

And all this was in front of multiple lanes of traffic entering and exiting an expressway on Main St. downtown.

Stoopid things!
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Old 07-17-08, 10:46 AM   #4
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cuz hot wimmuns expose us for the true clumsy dorks that we are....
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.... Other than being completely wrong, you're correct.
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Old 07-17-08, 10:47 AM   #5
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your only real option was to kill them all to erase all evidence of your epic fail.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 07-17-08, 11:08 AM   #6
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Your fail made me lol a bit.

Solution? Ride that route more often and hope for a round 2 to redeem yourself
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Old 07-17-08, 11:14 AM   #7
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Make sure if you go back, that you are properly dressed.

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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 07-17-08, 11:15 AM   #8
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Not the 4 collars!

That is classic
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Old 07-17-08, 11:46 AM   #9
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The bolt holding my saddle to my bike broke. I managed to get off the 4 lane road and remember to unclip before I let up pressure on the saddle and let it fall to the ground. I couldn't find the nut and most of the bolt. If I could have found the unique nut, I might have been able to get a new bolt at a hardware store. Had to stand on the peddles the rest of the way home, 2 miles. 93 degrees cloudless and this was the only day I didn't bring my tennis shoes home with me(I didn't want clipless without a seat).

Bicycle Fail?
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Old 07-17-08, 02:18 PM   #10
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The bolt holding my saddle to my bike broke. I managed to get off the 4 lane road and remember to unclip before I let up pressure on the saddle and let it fall to the ground. I couldn't find the nut and most of the bolt. If I could have found the unique nut, I might have been able to get a new bolt at a hardware store. Had to stand on the peddles the rest of the way home, 2 miles. 93 degrees cloudless and this was the only day I didn't bring my tennis shoes home with me(I didn't want clipless without a seat).

Bicycle Fail?
http://velonews.com/article/2409

"Finishing proved to be a tougher task in the men’s race where several top contenders dropped off the pace — or out of the race all together — because of course-induced mechanical problems. Among the most-damaged was Canadian Ryder Hesjedal, who saw his firm hold on second place evaporate when a crash ripped his saddle off his seat post. The Subaru-Gary Fisher rider wrapped an inner tube around his seat rails to protect himself from injury, but ended up settling for 28th, 16:18 behind Green."

and that 4 collar ****** must drink this:
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Old 07-17-08, 02:39 PM   #11
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hehe, not in front an mens, I usually do stuff like that at a stoplight at a busy intersection. Yup, there's me I look good standing there with my bike. And here we go - got a green light ---- OK foot slips and doesn't clip in, little wobbily - hit major pothole ---- front headlight pops off and is hanging by the cord ---- I quickly pull over to side of road to retrieve light - and hit curb and scrap along it - nearly toppling over as I'm still clipped in.

And all this was in front of multiple lanes of traffic entering and exiting an expressway on Main St. downtown.

Stoopid things!
Main and Union is a nasty intersection.

You manage to look good no matter what's happening though.
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Old 07-17-08, 02:45 PM   #12
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Main and Union is a nasty intersection.

You manage to look good no matter what's happening though.

Couple months ago had a woman edge over into my lane and then try to go around me on the right (so I have a car on each side of me) - so I slid over and had another car come around there - luckily it slowed up ------ I started to go over and reached out with my left hand and manage to push myself up off the still moving car and caught myself. Wasn't pretty at all. Kind of a scary incident. Unfortunately I do not have many easier options to get out of the heart of downtown. But I have reduced it to a 3 block stretch that is bad - the rest of the commute I've found paths thru alleys, building parking lots, small stretch of stairs and a couple curbs to some more quieter side streets.
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Old 07-17-08, 03:55 PM   #13
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I come open a slow group ride made up of mostly young 20-something riders. These women were really really attractive
Pics or it didn't happen.

I agree. The only time I ever have problems clipping in are when there are people I don't know around to witness it -- and even then, the likelihood of problems increases with the hotness of the women watching. DOH!
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Old 07-17-08, 03:58 PM   #14
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Pics or it didn't happen.
Next time I see em I'll be ready...

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I agree. The only time I ever have problems clipping in are when there are people I don't know around to witness it -- and even then, the likelihood of problems increases with the hotness of the women watching. DOH!
If they were any hotter, I'd have crashed for sure.
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