Cycling and bicycle discussion forums. 
   Click here to join our community Log in to access your Control Panel  


Go Back   > >

Foo Off-Topic chit chat with no general subject.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 07-24-08, 10:38 AM   #1
RubenX 
Look! My Spine!
Thread Starter
 
RubenX's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Kissimmee, FL
Bikes:
Posts: 619
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Wife's new delusion - The war hero Dad

For those foo'ers that don't know me yet, I'm the guy with the nut-case wife :S

We were watching a documentary about Vietnam and Korean wars on the history channel. It was that famous footage of the US evacuating the embassy by helicopters... all chaos. Then, out of the blue, my wife told our son: "That's what your grampa used to do. He was one of those helicopter pilots rescuing people on that war..." and she went on for a few minutes as my face went WTF?

I've known this family for 15 years. I know everything there is to know about my father in law. He WAS NOT a 'rescue pilot' in the war. He was not a pilot, EVER. He was a regular army guy, during non-conflict times, that never made it to Sargent. He went to a few bases during his short service and got out when foreign policy was getting nasty. My respect for serving his country and all... but for God's sake!

I had an argument with the wife about this. I want my son to learn about his family history, but learn the truth and nothing but the truth. My dad never made it past the 8th grade and he was a janitor his whole live. He never went to the war because he failed the military entrance exam thingie. Not pretty or glamorous but it's the truth. I love my dad, even tho he was nothing 'especial'. I love him because he was a good dad to me and that's all I need. He was always there for me.

I went on the internet and printed the time-lines for both wars. Then I made a small list of family events and dates to show my wife that his dad was not part of the military when the conflicts occurred. Still, she insists that her dad was there, rescuing people from Saigon. I wonder if she came up with this on her own, or maybe her old man told her the fake stories. Maybe her dad was trying to make up excuses for not being there. But still, the dates just don't match.

I should had gotten out of this problem when it was still easy, before the children.
RubenX is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:44 AM   #2
cohophysh
fishologist
 
cohophysh's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Pacific Northwest
Bikes: Diamondback MTB; Leader 736R
Posts: 1,201
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Dude, if she made this up she is having some severe mental issues. I remember from your last post that all she did was sit around the house all day. Like I said in your previous post, you guys need to seek help fast.
__________________
We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

1990 Diamond Back MTB
2007 Leader 736R
www.cohocyclist.blogspot.com
http://www.loopd.com/members/cohocyclist/Default.aspx


cohophysh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:45 AM   #3
cycle17
Warrior Cyclist
 
cycle17's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Davis, CA
Bikes: 07 Madone SL, 06 Madone 5.5 & 04 5500
Posts: 1,548
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Ummmm...yea. You really need to consider getting your wife into therapy. And sit your son down and tell him the truth and that mommy got mixed up confused. Sorry to hear about all the problems you've had recently. Hope in the end...it works out.
__________________
Just Do It..
cycle17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:47 AM   #4
UnsafeAlpine
Domestic Domestique
 
UnsafeAlpine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Michigan
Bikes: Brand New Old Catamount! Schwinn Homegrown, Specialized FSR, Salsa Vaya, Salsa Chile Con Crosso
Posts: 1,742
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
She needs psychiatric help. Now. It sounds as though things are heading downhill for her, and she's dragging the family with. She needs help. If she won't go, you may have to force her.
UnsafeAlpine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:48 AM   #5
mlts22 
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Bikes:
Posts: 998
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Maybe she is trying to give the kid a model to look up to, but there will be Hell to pay in the long run when the "war hero dad" role model is found out to be just fantasy.
mlts22 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:49 AM   #6
Hobartlemagne 
Spelling Snob
 
Hobartlemagne's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Plano, Texas
Bikes: Panasonic DX4000, Bianchi Pista
Posts: 2,862
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think she may end up being institutionalized at some point. She clearly prefers to live
in a different world than the reality world.
__________________

The first rule of flats is You don't talk about flats!
Hobartlemagne is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 10:55 AM   #7
CyLowe97
Up on the Down Side
 
CyLowe97's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago(ish)
Bikes:
Posts: 6,330
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
It's well known that I'm the kid from the cover of U2's Boy and War albums.

Meh. It's old war stories. Don't ruin the kid with the truth if it's going to devistate him. If he's old enough to understand that people sometimes pump up their credentials, then level with him.

edit.... better yet, have him ask his grandfather about his military experience. Get it straight from the source.
CyLowe97 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 11:03 AM   #8
timmhaan
more ape than man
 
timmhaan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: nyc
Bikes:
Posts: 8,093
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by CyLowe97 View Post
It's well known that I'm the kid from the cover of U2's Boy and War albums.

Meh. It's old war stories. Don't ruin the kid with the truth if it's going to devistate him. If he's old enough to understand that people sometimes pump up their credentials, then level with him.

edit.... better yet, have him ask his grandfather about his military experience. Get it straight from the source.
good idea.

i wouldn't go tearing down your wife's dad in front of the kid, but it would be a good idea to urge the kid to find the correct answers for himself.
timmhaan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 11:08 AM   #9
hos13
Senior Member
 
hos13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: 552 LATA
Bikes: 2007 Mercier Sperns (I'm a shill) and a 99 Diamondback Invert
Posts: 781
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I tell my kids I'm a Super Hero when I go work

Does your wife believe what she is saying?

Last edited by hos13; 07-24-08 at 12:39 PM.
hos13 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 11:31 AM   #10
CyLowe97
Up on the Down Side
 
CyLowe97's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago(ish)
Bikes:
Posts: 6,330
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Come to think of it, I have been telling my kids that various Tour de France riders are folks I know from bikeforums. They think aham23 is current winning the green jersey points competition.

This keeps their attention for about 10 seconds before they start demanding I change the channel back to Backyardigans (which, by the way, I created).

CyLowe97 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 12:02 PM   #11
SpongeDad
Overacting because I can
 
SpongeDad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: The Mean Streets of Bethesda, MD
Bikes: Merlin Agilis, Trek 1500
Posts: 4,552
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
At least she's pointing to something worthwhile. Sure, your son is deluded. But at least he thinks that "in my family, we brave things and try to help people."
__________________
“Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm." (Churchill)

"I am a courageous cyclist." (SpongeDad)
SpongeDad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 12:09 PM   #12
timmhaan
more ape than man
 
timmhaan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: nyc
Bikes:
Posts: 8,093
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i hate when people lie to kids. i remember many times when adults lied to me, and when i look back on it, it's soured my memories of them.
timmhaan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 12:29 PM   #13
RubenX 
Look! My Spine!
Thread Starter
 
RubenX's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Kissimmee, FL
Bikes:
Posts: 619
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
THX for the replies guys... you made me laugh

I did took the conversation private, away from the child, just wife and me. Still she was stating that it was all true, her dad being the daredevil rescue helicopter pilot, saving people while under fire right there on top of the Saigon embassy.

I don't discard the possibility of her dad making up these stories when she was younger and he was absent most of the time. It is not the first amazing story about her dad. So far her dad has been:

- A CIA agent that was called to work as a spy on the middle east, right before desert storm.
- The greatest accountant the world have ever known with a masters degree in accounting.
- A very wealthy fellow with millions of dollars in the bank.
- A very responsible father.

But the truth is, he was with a mistress during dessert storm, he dropped out of college, he never saved any money, he still owes 16k of child support from his 2 recognized children (now adults) and he has 3 more sons that never recognized to avoid the child support.

I would love to have a chat with this guy and ask him "WTF you did that messed up your daughter so bad?". But we are not on speaking terms anymore since his last 3 month long visit, when I told him to get a job and help with the rent and bills.

My mother told me it was a nut-case family... I didn't listened.
RubenX is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 12:32 PM   #14
goldfishin
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Bikes:
Posts: 521
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
go to a shrink that doesn't rely on pills. pills don't fix ****. that's my experience and that of some conscience having shrinks.
goldfishin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 12:58 PM   #15
black_box
Fax Transport Specialist
 
black_box's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: chicago burbs
Bikes: '07 fuji cross pro, '10 gary fisher x-caliber
Posts: 898
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by goldfishin View Post
go to a shrink that doesn't rely on pills. pills don't fix ****. that's my experience and that of some conscience having shrinks.
+1, try shock therapy. car batteries are readily available.
black_box is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:46 PM   #16
scottmorrison99
New! With Self Loathing!
 
scottmorrison99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Fairfield, California
Bikes: 2013 Jamis Xenith T time trial bike, 2013 Jamis Xenith Elite
Posts: 1,612
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by hos13 View Post
I tell my kids I'm a Super Hero when I go work
I don't have to tell mine that. Lycra commute outfit=Superhero costume. Obvious.
__________________
Scotty

Weird Bike Guy Blog
scottmorrison99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:47 PM   #17
trsidn 
Meadow Party Member
 
trsidn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
Bikes: Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200
Posts: 280
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 38 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by scottmorrison99 View Post
I don't have to tell mine that. Lycra commute outfit=Superhero costume. Obvious.
my kids didn't buy it
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElJamoquio View Post
.... Other than being completely wrong, you're correct.
trsidn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:47 PM   #18
mrnicho
minnesota nick
 
mrnicho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Chaska, MN
Bikes: 2003 Specialized Allez
Posts: 6
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I can't fool my kids anymore. I told them that I had invented air when I was in high school. The 5 year old giggled and the 9 year old rolled her eyes.

Ungrateful little turds....
mrnicho is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:49 PM   #19
bac
Senior Member
 
bac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Pennsylvania
Bikes: Too many to list!
Posts: 7,481
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by RubenX View Post
Then, out of the blue, my wife told our son: "That's what your grampa used to do. He was one of those helicopter pilots rescuing people on that war..." and she went on for a few minutes as my face went WTF?
Wow - if it isn't the truth .... wow.

... Brad
bac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:50 PM   #20
trsidn 
Meadow Party Member
 
trsidn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
Bikes: Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200
Posts: 280
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 38 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by RubenX View Post

My mother told me it was a nut-case family... I didn't listened.
heh, we have all ignored advice at one time or another. Or more than once

Maybe your first order of business should be to get some counseling for yourself to help determine a course of action.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElJamoquio View Post
.... Other than being completely wrong, you're correct.
trsidn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:53 PM   #21
CyLowe97
Up on the Down Side
 
CyLowe97's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago(ish)
Bikes:
Posts: 6,330
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by trsidn View Post
Maybe your first order of business should be to get some counseling for yourself to help determine a course of action.
Nah. The first order of business is to post the problem on the internets, where everyone is exactly what they say they are.
CyLowe97 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 01:54 PM   #22
trsidn 
Meadow Party Member
 
trsidn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
Bikes: Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200
Posts: 280
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 38 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by CyLowe97 View Post
Nah. The first order of business is to post the problem on the internets, where everyone is exactly what they say they are.
ok, second
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElJamoquio View Post
.... Other than being completely wrong, you're correct.
trsidn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 02:50 PM   #23
black_box
Fax Transport Specialist
 
black_box's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: chicago burbs
Bikes: '07 fuji cross pro, '10 gary fisher x-caliber
Posts: 898
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
making up heroic war stories? sounds like she's fit to be vice president...
black_box is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 02:53 PM   #24
Alfster 
long time visiter
 
Alfster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: in the Northern Tundra
Bikes: 2005 Trek 6700 disc 2007 Orbea Onix 2009 Raleigh One Way
Posts: 615
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by black_box View Post
making up heroic war stories? sounds like she's fit to be vice president...
OK, that was funny
Alfster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-08, 03:30 PM   #25
ken cummings
Senior Member
 
ken cummings's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: northern California
Bikes: Bruce Gordon BLT, Cannondale parts bike, Ecodyne recumbent trike, Counterpoint Opus 2, miyata 1000
Posts: 5,601
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I shared a house with a compulsive liar and her two little girls for ten years. One ended up a single welfare mom and the other stiffed relatives for $35,000 for a training program she didn't finish. Your kid may already need help.
ken cummings is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:29 AM.