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  1. #1
    kellyjdrummer
    Guest

    On the witness stand.....

    In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner

    :Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse?

    Coroner: No.

    Attorney: Did you listen to the heart?

    Coroner: No.

    Attorney: Did you check for breathing?

    Coroner: No.

    Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren''t sure the man was dead, were you?

    Coroner: Well, let me put it this way. The man''s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it''s possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere

  2. #2
    King of the Plukers Spreggy's Avatar
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    Lawyer jokes, nice one!

    Hey it sure was cold in NY city last winter.
    How cold was it?
    It was so cold the lawyers had their hands in their own pockets.
    “Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”
    ― Muhammad Ali

  3. #3
    Banned
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    Pacific hardtail (frame only right now); Weyless SP (frame/fork right now); Jamis Dakar XLT 1.0 custom build-up (fully functional)
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    What's the definition of an accident?
    A busload of lawyers going over a cliff.

    What's the definition of a tragedy?
    The bus had an empty seat.

  4. #4
    kellyjdrummer
    Guest
    10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
    A good start.

    Old one.

  5. #5
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    Jun 2005
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    Pagosa Springs, CO, USA
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    Road, MTB, Cruiser, Chopper, BMX
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    What's the difference between a dead deer in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?


    The deer has skidmarks in front of it.
    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  6. #6
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
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    Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
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    '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa
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    Why do lawyers wear ties?

    So the foreskin does not hit them in the face.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

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