Advertise on Bikeforums.net



User Tag List

Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 97
  1. #1
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    A 100+ ways to break a date ot the Date Killer thread.

    We have all been there. The date that we wanted to end this very instant. Towards that end here is a little thread that will help you with exuses. Creative to ones that will get you slapped.

    Let me kick it off.

    " I think you are heavier than me "

  2. #2
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    10,497
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I'm not the type to be rude about it. I say just suddenly grab your phone, say it's a text and you have a home emergency.

    Plus anyone would be heavier than a person named "skinnyone"....jus' sayin'.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  3. #3
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind View Post
    I'm not the type to be rude about it. I say just suddenly grab your phone, say it's a text and you have a home emergency.

    Plus anyone would be heavier than a person named "skinnyone"....jus' sayin'.
    Ok that is cliched though Siu. you gotta make them mad enough to tear your head off so that in actuality they will either ask for the check or...

    For eg - " Damn your sister is hot "

  4. #4
    BF Risk Manager
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Snohomish County, Washington USA
    My Bikes
    Road, mountain and folding
    Posts
    896
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    "I have a sudden burning discharge"
    Regards, MillCreek
    Snohomish County, Washington USA

  5. #5
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Pagosa Springs, CO, USA
    My Bikes
    Road, MTB, Cruiser, Chopper, BMX
    Posts
    2,880
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    "Oh, I think my wife just called me..."
    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    tell her you'd rather just wank.

  7. #7
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    10,497
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by skinnyone View Post
    Ok that is cliched though Siu. you gotta make them mad enough to tear your head off so that in actuality they will either ask for the check or...

    For eg - " Damn your sister is hot "
    But why would you want someone to be hurt?
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  8. #8
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by goldfishin View Post
    tell her you'd rather just wank.
    Winning strategy either way..
    Quote Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind View Post
    But why would you want someone to be hurt?
    You are right. Thats kinda bad

  9. #9
    Senior Member CollectiveInk's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Johnson City, TN
    My Bikes
    Specialized Allez Elite / Haro Extreme x6 Expert / Trek 4300
    Posts
    217
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Two words "Lemon law" (Barney's rule from 'How I met your mother')
    Tim
    ---------------------------------
    Specialized Allez Elite / Haro Extreme x6 Expert / Trek 4300 / Fuji Supreme SL / LeMond Reno - converted for TT / Giant Warp DS1 / Tommaso Ponza / Trek 4300 - 13.5" (For Sale)

  10. #10
    Barbieri Telefonico huhenio's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Albuquerque, New Mexico
    My Bikes
    Crappy but operational secondhand Motobecane Messenger
    Posts
    3,522
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by Siu Blue Wind View Post
    But why would you want someone to be hurt?
    yeah ... your date may assault you with the fork or knife
    Giving Haircuts Over The Phone

  11. #11
    AEO
    AEO is offline
    Senior Member AEO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    A Coffin Called Earth. or Toronto, ON
    My Bikes
    Bianchi, Miyata, Dahon, Rossin
    Posts
    12,245
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    reminds me of the 'masterdate' skit that conan o'brian had.

    my favorite one by far is...

    "I uh... gotta go return some videos..."
    Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
    http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm

  12. #12
    It's easy being green. recumelectric's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    in the desert
    My Bikes
    Trek Beach Cruiser, Sun X-2 AX (bent)
    Posts
    932
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    1) "I forgot to tell you about my ongoing battle with herpes. It's been a true adventure!"

    2) "My mother wants to meet you."

    3) Just start picking your nose and wipe it on your pants, the table, a passerby...

    4) "See that guy over there? I'm sure I could take him. Just give me a reason!"

    For girls...

    1) "Normally, I carry my strap-on everywhere I go, but my friends thought it might scare you."

    2) "You're pretty special. I shaved up to the knee for this date."

    3) Just fart and giggle at it.

    4) "See that guy over there? I'm sure I could have him. Just give me a reason!"
    When I ride, the troubles just roll off my back.

    Originally Posted by Cody Broken :
    Every ride is a mission, a race, an adventure, a quest.
    Every bike is noble steed, a stalwart machine, a clever device, a stealthy speedster.

  13. #13
    Evil Pony Moskau's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Iceland
    My Bikes
    Trek 6000
    Posts
    73
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I didn't actually go through with a date with him but he was all excited planning something without asking me if it was what I wanted (ghost trip, wtf?). So the more he went on the more I decided it was a no-go. So chatting on MSN I did something very cruel and hinted at something having happened the night before, he took the bait and started asking so I told him I had been wanting to sleep with some guy downtown the night before but hadn't been able to.

    Haven't heard from him since. Score!

    I am normally not that much of a witch...

  14. #14
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
    My Bikes
    '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa
    Posts
    6,064
    Mentioned
    11 Post(s)
    Tagged
    3 Thread(s)
    As she is speaking to you, look deep into her eyes and then throw up. Make sure to get some on both of you.

    Also works when kissing, and if the date is bad enough, this strangely makes it is easire to regurgitate.
    Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  15. #15
    J E R S E Y S B E S T Jerseysbest's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    DC
    Posts
    1,852
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Ugh, I'm a complete wuss, I've never gotten out of bad date, but I've never really had a really really bad one. Maybe the worst is when they continuously talk and talk about themselves with barely a pause; only way I could get out of that would be to get up and walk away.

  16. #16
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    NYC
    My Bikes
    04' Specialized Hardrock Sport, 03' Giant OCR2 (SOLD!), 04' Litespeed Firenze, 04' Giant OCR Touring, 07' Specialized Langster Comp
    Posts
    15,765
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    "So you charge by the hour? I only need like 10 minutes with you though."

  17. #17
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I want to show you my LOLcat shrine.

  18. #18
    Barbieri Telefonico huhenio's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Albuquerque, New Mexico
    My Bikes
    Crappy but operational secondhand Motobecane Messenger
    Posts
    3,522
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    "Look at the jugs on that chick ... would you like a treesome with her? (waves at passerby girl)... hey ... HEY!!! OVERHERE !!!!!"

    That should kill it right there.
    Giving Haircuts Over The Phone

  19. #19
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
    My Bikes
    '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa
    Posts
    6,064
    Mentioned
    11 Post(s)
    Tagged
    3 Thread(s)
    Get a bowling ball bag and keep a severed head in it. When the date goes bad, just pull out the head and start talking to it about how you like the new head on your date better.
    Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  20. #20
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Hope you have a big trunk! because I am gonna put my bike in it.

  21. #21
    WTF is that smell? crackerjab's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Charlotte, NC
    Posts
    449
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Who's your fat friend?

  22. #22
    T-Shirt Guy ehidle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Lansdale, PA
    My Bikes
    2005 Fuji Team Issue, 2007 Fuji SL-1
    Posts
    464
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    "Yeah, I'm a personal trainer... give me a couple of weeks and I could help you get rid of that belly"
    Yellow + Blue Jerseys!

    Get your Cranky T-Shirt!
    Men's
    and Women's designs available

  23. #23
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Just NW of Richardson Bike Mart
    My Bikes
    '05 Trek 1200 / '90 Trek 8000 / '? Falcon Europa
    Posts
    6,064
    Mentioned
    11 Post(s)
    Tagged
    3 Thread(s)
    You could always resort to referring to yourself in the third person.

    "You amuse and intrique the skinnyone." "Keep it up and the skinnyone may grant you access to the skinnyone's bed of delight"
    Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  24. #24
    Dude wheres my guads? skinnyone's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Guess
    My Bikes
    Not enough
    Posts
    2,680
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    You could always resort to referring to yourself in the third person.

    "You amuse and intrique the skinnyone." "Keep it up and the skinnyone may grant you access to the skinnyone's bed of delight"
    I already use that with much success

  25. #25
    Super Moderator Allen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Atomic batteries to power; turbines to speed
    My Bikes
    Salsa La Raza, Panasonic Electric, Bria, Bamboo touring, Bamboo cargo
    Posts
    4,677
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Stick your finger in your ear and then smell it.
    That alone should do the trick, if not do it again, but this time offer your finger to your date to smell while asking, "Does this smell infected to you?" in your best red neck accent.
    Quote Originally Posted by unterhausen
    I believe that in this case "solid meh" means "so 'meh' that it could never be anything more than 'meh', and yet also no less than 'meh' -- in a word, exactly 'meh'"

Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •