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Old 08-18-08, 09:47 PM   #1
UnsafeAlpine
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Mmmmmmmm........ :(

Is she mean? Is she stupid? Is she just confused? Why does she have to keep messing with me?
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Old 08-18-08, 09:49 PM   #2
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Um, because you let her? Duh?
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Old 08-18-08, 09:53 PM   #3
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Um, because you let her? Duh?
Tell me how not to let her. I'm about as apathetic towards everything as anyone can be. The only reason I'm doing anything (school, riding, whatever) is because I have to do that stuff. I don't care about anything anymore...except for her. I don't know how to deal with that.
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Old 08-18-08, 09:53 PM   #4
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Um, because you let her? Duh?
+1.

Kick her out of your life via The No-A**hole Rule.
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Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.
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Old 08-18-08, 09:54 PM   #5
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because it bothers you...
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Old 08-18-08, 09:54 PM   #6
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I'm thinkin what he said ^

what'd she do now?
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Old 08-18-08, 09:55 PM   #7
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act like it doesnt bother you at all, sit back and watch the changes
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Old 08-18-08, 09:57 PM   #8
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Tell me how not to let her. I'm about as apathetic towards everything as anyone can be. The only reason I'm doing anything (school, riding, whatever) is because I have to do that stuff. I don't care about anything anymore...except for her. I don't know how to deal with that.
you've clearly got a lot more going for you than the busted up past-relationship you're focusing on. the sooner you're able to realize that (and you will, its just a matter of time) the better. things will just seem to fall into place. (they're probably already there, you just can't see it)
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Old 08-18-08, 10:00 PM   #9
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Because you are CHOOSING to allow her to do this.

Dangit. I thought I gave up on you. I guess I care.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:01 PM   #10
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oh, and another note... i find there are a couple stages I go through getting over relationships.
Sad- omg its over, what now, what went wrong, am i not worthy... all that depressing stuff..
Angry - what an a-hole, i didn't deserve all that crap, he never deserved me anyway...
Happy - i'm awesome, people like me.

sounds like you're still on phase one, so get mad at her so you can move on.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:04 PM   #11
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Listen to Artifice. She's a smart woman.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:08 PM   #12
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You're awesome UA. I like you.



Crap...that may not help.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:10 PM   #13
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I am mad at her. I'm pissed at the way she treated me and has been treating me, but I'm still in love with her.

I'm working on not caring, but, again, I'm still in love with her. That's what I can't figure out how to deal with...
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Old 08-18-08, 10:10 PM   #14
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Oh god you make me want to scream.

Look, this advice is not coming from "the guy who just likes to be a d1ck," as I am commonly portrayed on these forums, but from someone who underwent a profoundly painful breakup in 2000, one that still has repercussions for better or worse on my life now, and a breakup I feel as if I dishonored myself by grovelling too much due to the incredible pain I was feeling.

Okay, there's a reason why when you join the military or a religious cult, they put you through grueling physical punishment and sleep deprivation. Because mental habits are best broken this way. Zen monks will often hit monks who are quietly meditating with a stick to try and break habitual thought patterns and achieve something more conducive to satori. I am absolutely not telling you to join the Marines or Scientology, nor am I attempting to evaluate the morality of such punishment, as I quite obviously am ambivalent about it.

What I am saying is that right now, training for that marathon you've always dreamt of, or cyclocross race or triathlon or whatever might be just the thing, instead of sitting alone in your apartment feeling like a discarded toy, and dwelling on why she doesn't love you anymore. Physical punishment is probably your best hope for a positive psychological change. Emotional pain goes so deep, nothing else can really touch it, in my experience.

My advice, take it or leave it.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:16 PM   #15
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My advice, take it or leave it.
I like it, especially the getting hit with a stick part.

You're right, though, I do need to get out. Maybe I'll do a little ride tomorrow, now that the back is starting to feel better.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:18 PM   #16
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Your back will feel much better without her stomping on it
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Old 08-18-08, 10:24 PM   #17
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I like it, especially the getting hit with a stick part.

You're right, though, I do need to get out. Maybe I'll do a little ride tomorrow, now that the back is starting to feel better.
Good. Your life is changed, whether you like it or not, but it's up to you to see the momentum is used for positive or negative ends.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:26 PM   #18
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Good. Your life is changed, whether you like it or not, but it's up to you to see the momentum is used for positive or negative ends.
dude!! are you in danger of becoming a good person? I think I just felt a tear...
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Old 08-18-08, 10:28 PM   #19
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dude!! are you in danger of becoming a good person? I think I just felt a tear...
A hitch-hiker told me that one...before I killed him for his bedroll.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:32 PM   #20
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A hitch-hiker told me that one...before I killed him for his bedroll.
You're just pulling for mod status, aren't you?
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Old 08-18-08, 10:46 PM   #21
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Is she mean? Yes. Is she stupid? Probably...she isn't crawling back, right? Is she just confused? Again, see previous reason. Why does she have to keep messing with me? Pure evil.
...
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Old 08-18-08, 10:48 PM   #22
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This is sorta like when you get a bad cut, but it has a really good scab on it. It hurts like hell, but you just cannot resist picking that scab. Remember though, you keep picking at it and it is not gonna heal as cleanly and it might get infected. But a band aid over it and let it heal.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:51 PM   #23
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This is sorta like when you get a bad cut, but it has a really good scab on it. It hurts like hell, but you just cannot resist picking that scab. Remember though, you keep picking at it and it is not gonna heal as cleanly and it might get infected. But a band aid over it and let it heal.
Also, when it comes time to rip off the bandaid...do it fast and don't be tempted to chew on it.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:52 PM   #24
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It's CONTROL. Nasty girl.
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Old 08-18-08, 10:53 PM   #25
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Also, when it comes time to rip off the bandaid...do it fast and don't be tempted to chew on it.
That is the dogs job. Actually , I let the dog lick the scab instead of picking it. Maybe you need a dog UA.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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