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  1. #1
    somewhere in the ether spoketacular's Avatar
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    Does this make me a sexist pig?

    Ok, this morning, around about 5:30, the squirrels started their usual bombing of the patio roof deck with acorns a little earlier, and I snuggled up to The Blonde, who was curled up on her side. And since she usually sleeps commando, well, I took the op to to um, squeeze her butt a bit...

    TB: (stirring) "Um, no, you're not getting any this morning. I'm tired."

    Me: "Oh, I'm not going for that. I just wanted to see if your butt passes inspection."

    TB: "Hmmppf."

    Me: "You have a perfect butt. I can grasp it easily with one hand. If I need 2 hands, well, that would be gross. Just think of this as a bridge inspection; I've inspected bridges before, and I'm just checking your structural integrity."

    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong

    Trek 2200 / Schwinn Madison / K2 Firebird

  2. #2
    ......... diggy488's Avatar
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    we can validate this situation with pics of said 'blonde'

  3. #3
    somewhere in the ether spoketacular's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by diggy488 View Post
    we can validate this situation with pics of said 'blonde'
    You people are way too easy.









    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong

    Trek 2200 / Schwinn Madison / K2 Firebird

  4. #4
    Overacting because I can SpongeDad's Avatar
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    Sexist, no.

    Not so smart, let's just say that we will all pray that The Blonde doesn't read BF.
    “Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm." (Churchill)

    "I am a courageous cyclist." (SpongeDad)

  5. #5
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    No, I consider squeezing the wife's hiney the same as patting my pockets to make sure my keys are there.

    Even if you don't plan to drive, it's still nice to know it's an option later.
    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  6. #6
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
    No, I consider squeezing the wife's hiney the same as patting my pockets to make sure my keys are there.

    Even if you don't plan to drive, it's still nice to know it's an option later.
    Posiibly the most intelligent and well thought out thing you have ever graced us with. Thank you sir.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  7. #7
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    How is that sexist? I wouldn't dare share what my wife and I do when even our parents are 5 feet away (but looking the other way), even in public.

  8. #8
    some new kind of kick Suttree's Avatar
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    Sexist no. TMI possibly. Funny, but
    more than I wanted to know, not that it
    in any way bothers me. Bet you a
    beer it is more than she wanted
    us to know.

  9. #9
    superArti artifice's Avatar
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    I think its cute. I love snuggling up to a little... uhhh being inspected. I'm a pretty sound sleeper, and usually just roll over and cuddle up back to sleep. Sometimes I know its going on and pretend to sleep thru it for the reason she mentioned "Um, no, you're not getting any this morning. I'm tired."... its easier to prentend to sleep than knock someone's hopes down.
    ha.

  10. #10
    Senior Member ritepath's Avatar
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    Since this was with the wife no, if it were smoe stranger then it's borderline. I recommend you consult smoeone from NOW.
    Harmony, Spirit, Way

  11. #11
    somewhere in the ether spoketacular's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SpongeDad View Post
    Sexist, no.

    Not so smart, let's just say that we will all pray that The Blonde doesn't read BF.
    Ah, she's got a sense of humour, actually.
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong

    Trek 2200 / Schwinn Madison / K2 Firebird

  12. #12
    Banned. timmyquest's Avatar
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    That's funny, that was the exact opposite of the response i got today. I guess i win at women.

  13. #13
    KombuchaCHIC Shadiyah's Avatar
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    Grabbing your SO's ass isn't what I would call sexist, but perhaps the notion that the perfect ass can fit into one hand is?

    <--two hand ass girl.

  14. #14
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    maybe the dud has big hands
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

    1990 Diamond Back MTB
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  15. #15
    KombuchaCHIC Shadiyah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cohophysh View Post
    maybe the dud has big hands
    Well, I hadn't thought of that. Hmmmmm....big hands....

  16. #16
    somewhere in the ether spoketacular's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shadiyah View Post
    Grabbing your SO's ass isn't what I would call sexist, but perhaps the notion that the perfect ass can fit into one hand is?

    <--two hand ass girl.
    Well, actually one buttcheek fits in one hand, so yes, I need two hands to literally grab her ass.
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong

    Trek 2200 / Schwinn Madison / K2 Firebird

  17. #17
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spoketacular View Post
    Well, actually one buttcheek fits in one hand, so yes, I need two hands to literally grab her ass.
    So you are saying that what you did this morning was just a half assed attempt to get some?
    Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  18. #18
    somewhere in the ether spoketacular's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    So you are saying that what you did this morning was just a half assed attempt to get some?
    Well, based that I got 0 results for what I really had in mind - yes.
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong
    You rise, you fall, you down, then you rise again
    What don't kill you make you more strong

    Trek 2200 / Schwinn Madison / K2 Firebird

  19. #19
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    I have no ass. So she's pretty lucky. And no, it's not sexist.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  20. #20
    Domestic Domestique UnsafeAlpine's Avatar
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    I like butts...

  21. #21
    Banned. timmyquest's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UnsafeAlpine View Post
    I like butts...
    ...and i cannot lie...

  22. #22
    Senior Member kwrides's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ritepath View Post
    Since this was with the wife no, if it were smoe stranger then it's borderline. I recommend you consult smoeone from NOW.
    Another sign I'm getting old. I didn't think we were allowed to do that with some stranger

  23. #23
    phony collective progress x136's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shadiyah View Post
    Hmmmmm....big hands....
    And you know what that means!

    (big gloves)

  24. #24
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    I guess, because the women seem to agree that this doesn't make you a sexist pig, that you're not a sexist pig. I dunno. You might be perceived by some to be just an ordinary pig for talking out of school.

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