So I proposed to my fiance a few months ago.
We move to a new area, closer to home/family/where we grew up, on August 4th, so not too long ago.
We try to find a new church to join, found one we liked out of all the lutheran churches in town, then talk to the pastor about joining and getting married there.
He basically says no, since we live together. I understand his point of view, but, my fiance is nowhere near the financial ability to pay for an apartment/other bills by herself, plus we've been living together for quite a while. I understand that if he, under Gods will, accepts us in the church, let alone marries us, that he will be going against Gods will - since he will know for a fact that we will intentionally be living together till marriage.
He gave us two options. 1 - to marry soon, like a couple weeks from now (legally), join the church, then proceed with the "premarital meetings" and have a ceremony (about a year from now) or 2 - to split from living together, join the church, and continue with the premarital meetings, have a ceremony (about a year from now).
Well, since we're closer to where we grew up, I have my childhood pastor that lives not too far away, but far enough that it would suck to have to drive 80 miles a handful of times just to have meetings with him. But, I know he would marry 2 people living together, as I know two couples who he has married that lived together.
SO, it's either we join the church and marry legally within a couple weeks, separate from living together till marriage, join the church and continue meeting with pastor (traditional ceremony a year from now), or get married in our hometown, keep living together, drive to the meetings and have a traditional ceremony a year from now. I'm stuck in a rut right now. The right thing to do would be to marry right now, legally. But we don't feel like we're ready just yet, and we'd want to be officially married during a traditional wedding.