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  1. #1
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    Thinking of leaving NYC.

    WARNING: Potentially long and serious post.

    I hope that some people here can help me out, as this is a decision I will have to make within the next two years.

    I've gave NYC a try for a year, and I feel like I don't fit in. Since I'm an engineering student and like lists, here are my reasons why:

    • Being happy is a GOOD thing. I feel that so many people here (especially the women, regardless of age) are so unhappy and gloomy. Wherever I go, whether it'd be the train, streets, or stores (unless it's something material, of course), fellow New Yorkers seem so upset. In fact, I actually told one woman that she "looks so serious" (she had a nice frown on her face, almost an aggressive one), and she actually responded that "that's what her face looks like." She actually re-iterated that after someone else talked to her. Sigh.
    • Friendship is fake. When I was younger and inexperienced with the corporate environment, I enjoyed hustling and walking with the masses of people heading for their office jobs in the finance sectors of Manhattan. However, after spending a few months working inside of it (three months at a time), I quickly became disillusioned. Besides the usual office politics and complaints, every friendship that I saw; every social interaction I noticed; I got the impression that everything was just business. Nothing seemed genuine. I felt that people were concerned about others and their lives...until 5pm (or 6 or 7pm, in my case) came around. This feeling is amplified even more when juxtaposed with my current job, where a LOT of the relationships created here go way beyond work time (some people here even rely on that to stay). That's why I avoided making friends; I like making friends with people that will be worth it.
    • I'm not trendy. I don't care for living in an overpriced 2-room apartment (that collects no value), just to be near some hot restaurants and nightlife, and maybe receive some amenities that I can take care of myself anyway.
    • Like driving, cycling sucks around here. It's fun to pace with taxis and get the rush of almost getting hit, but it's not something I want to spend my 20's doing. I also would love to live next to smooth road and be closer to beautiful climbs and rural roads.


    Because of all of this, I'm thinking of moving to a different landscape when I'm done with school. I'm slated to graduate in May 2010, unless things change and I can graduate early in December (doubtful). I was wondering if y'all could offer some suggestions to consider.

    My former girlfriend resides in North Carolina now, and when I went to visit her four months ago, the location was GREAT, the housing was cheap (and you get some NICE houses), and the people were slower, but friendlier. I'm actually looking for an environment that's slooooooooooowwwwwwwweeeeeerrrrr. I don't really feel the need to rush in my life, since I have quite a while to live anyway. I already understand that I can expect my starting salary to be comparatively lower, but this recent co-op has taught me that there are better things in life than having money. I'm happier now than I've ever been, and I'm practically working paycheck to paycheck (which I never had to do in my previous job in Midtown). I do, however, want to be at least between 50 to 100 miles away from a city so that I can have an easy outlet to the essentials, like shopping or entertainment.

    There is another alternative: give the city some more time. I've already lived here for a year, and I will live here until I graduate. I've already tried living on campus, and Hoboken is pretty much like New York, but smaller (and you know what they say about pressure and volume). Compounded with the "wonderful" college life and its populace, I will have no problems skipping on it. Considering that I've shared these feelings practically since I've moved here, is it that the adjustment period is a little longer for some, or should I go with my feelings and start planning?

    What do you guys think?

    Thanks, and I really appreciate any kind advice anyone can offer. Feel free to PM me if you have any side notes you want to discuss.
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

  2. #2
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    Follow your heart in this decision. you are dealing with your happiness, and not an objective measure.

    And FWIW, the south is good, made even better by the fact I'm here in the south.

  3. #3
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    I should also add that if you have lived in New York City before, and decided to move to the South or elsewhere (doesn't have to be the South), I especially want to hear from you.
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

  4. #4
    On my TARDIScycle! KingTermite's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecake View Post
    - it's pretty well established that Hitler was an *******.

  5. #5
    Banned Indy_Rider's Avatar
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    Might consider the midwest. Nice laid back atmosphere for the most part. I can't do big cities either, though finding engineering jobs outside of big cities is more difficult.

  6. #6
    Senior Member thebarerider's Avatar
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    Let me just address your list in order. For some background on me, I'm 23 and recently considered all of these things (although I wanted to move North). This is just my take on it, of course. Discard it if you wish.

    -Being Happy

    People are not anymore unhappy in the North than they are in the South. I would venture a guess the problem here is projection; if you look out and think people are unhappy, they are unhappy. Get to know some people and test your hypothesis before making a conclusion like this.

    If it's not projection, and the people really are unhappy, you won't find much difference in the South unless it is on the surface. A lot of 'happiness' in the South is based on a polite exterior, which ties in with another point you made: you don't like fakeness. The South can be very fake.

    --You're not trendy

    When you get a large group of people together (i.e., a community) there are people who fit in and people who don't. You will have to choose your evil, here -- if you don't like the types of trends in NYC, you may be more comfortable with the types of trends in the South. Then again, you might not. Traveling to N.C. for a short vacation is not a true picture of what the South is like. Vacation eyes are like drunk eyes--all the good things stand out, all the bad things fade into the background.

    --Cycling

    You will find climbs and rural roads in some parts of the South, but there are major cities that run into suburb upon suburb in the South. And some parts of the South are also flat. The roads aren't all that smooth, either.

    The fact is, you should really wait to make a decision for at least another year (which you will because of college). Living in a place for a year isn't enough time, at least not IMO--then again, you don't want to be forever saying 'maybe next year I'll like it.' Of course, at this point, that isn't a valid concern.

    Assess who you are. In the end, home is where you make it. The right location is not the most important factor. Remember, there are many more sub-communities in a place like NYC than N.C.

  7. #7
    The Improbable Bulk Little Darwin's Avatar
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    Having moved from the SF Bay Area to Wilkes-Barre I can definitely understand your sentiments.

    Traffic is not an issue here. 8 miles in under 10 minutes instead of 30. No wall to wall people. But still a couple of hours from the hustle and bustle when I am in the mood for it (which isn't often).

    In most cases the ares with lower cost of living also come with lower salaries, so don't be too optimistic about the lower cost of living unless you either have the job lined up, or are coming with a cash reserve.

    Also, some areas (like mine) even though they are more rural still don't have the laid back pace. Even though there is nothing here that even resembles real traffic, people send emails to everyone in the building to warn them of lane closures on the freeway that may cause 10 minute delays on their commutes. Lord forbid that their 15 minute commute turn into a 25 minute commute once a month. They serously act like a 3 or 4 mile backup is the end of the world. People actually call other people still back in the office to report on traffic.

    But, I digress.

    I concur with one of the above messages. Follow your heart! And I add to remember that whatever you decide is not permanent, you can adjust if you find you can't deal with something like the banana spiders in South Carolina.

  8. #8
    Senior Member CollectiveInk's Avatar
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    Having grown up in NM and lived in Dallas... I can attest to the change living in the south is a good one if you want a slower pace of life. Johnson City, TN where my son and I live now has grown on me in the past 14 years. The cost of living is pretty low, no income tax, WONDERFUL hilly country for cycling, and it's pretty centrally located.

    The tri-cities area is combined +/- 100k in population, but within an hours drive you can be in areas of 250k +. A bit further than that... in the millions. I like the fact that within four hours of driving I can be in Atlanta/Raleigh/Nashville/Columbia-Charleston. Within 6 hours I can be in Wash DC, Memphis, Southern Ohio, Northern Florida, Maryland, etc...

    As for engineering work... we got trains! Just kidding. Actually, there is a lot of industry, not to mention the TVA. You can live decently on 30k a year or find jobs paying 6 figures. Education (for children) can be spotty, but that's why my son is at a private school (which is still way cheaper than my friend's children's tuition!)

    The people are genuine, friendly (sometimes to a fault) and friendships run deep. Of course you'll find all types, but that's a safe stereotyping of the south.

    All in all you seem to have a good head on your shoulders if you're young and seeing the lunacy of trying to keep up with the Jones (so to speak.) Why not try vacationing in different spots in the south during school breaks and get a feel for them?

    Goodluck in your search.
    Tim
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  9. #9
    Rawwrrrrrrrrr! wolfpack's Avatar
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    where in NC is your ex from?
    wolfpackcycles
    skiffrun: Enjoy the ride. Ride for the enjoyment.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Lamplight's Avatar
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    I've lived in Tennessee my entire life, so that may very well have something to do with the fact that I'm not fond of this place. I'll divide my post into two parts, and these are relating specifically to my town, which has just over 100,000 people.

    Cons:

    1. Most people here are at least moderately friendly to you, if they have to talk to you. For example, at work nearly all of our customers are nice to me when we're talking. Ride on the MUP, however, and try waving, nodding, or saying hello to anyone. No one will respond, except with a glare that's reminiscent of one you might receive after killing their dog.

    2. This town is chock-full of the worst drivers I've ever seen. Being in NYC, I'm sure you've seen crazier, though. It seems like nearly everyone here has to go wide open throttle at all times. And I'm convinced none of them have ever used a turn signal in their lives. Tailgating is simply a constant here. The only way to avoid it (besides not driving at all, like me) is to have a vehicle capable of a higher top speed than the one behind you. You can be driving 55mph in a 30mph zone, but if someone is behind you it won't be fast enough. Folks here seem to be in a panicky hurry, and they hate ANYONE who may slow them down, even if it's for a few seconds.

    3. Cyclists are not welcome here. Yes, you'll occasionally run across someone who is courteous and understanding, but for the most part cycling on the road here will make you one very hated individual. You'll be yelled at, honked at, have things thrown, etc. even when you're in the bike lane minding your own business. And if you're holding up traffic in any way, even if you're legally in the right, they'll be even more hateful toward you. When you lock your bike up at a store, the looks you receive will be a combination of confusion, disgust, and even fear. People here have no comprehension of using a bicycle for transportation. You might as well be walking around town naked; the reaction would be similar.

    4. Summer is HOT here. We got lucky this year and only topped 100 a few times, but once is too much for me. If you don't mind heat this may not bother you. Of course, our winters are mild compared to up north, but we still get plenty of cold weather, as well. It's routinely in the low 20s or below when I ride to work in the morning. We rarely get snow, though.

    5. Most people here seem to be obsessed with: Eating, shopping, cars, and sports. If these things don't interest you, you may feel out of place.

    I'll type the Pros when I get home.
    Last edited by Lamplight; 10-01-08 at 05:47 PM.

  11. #11
    The Improbable Bulk Little Darwin's Avatar
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    Oh yes... In rural areas, be prepared to hear discussions about sports. High School football, basketball and baseball.

    People I work with know the star players for high schools for a 20 or 30 mile radius, and know which teams have a chance at the titles for the various leagues and divisions. Which teams historically do well, and who has coached which teams for the past 20 or 30 years, and who the best players were back in the day.

    And of course, then there is college ball. It is a 2 hour drive to State College, but I work with people that attend every Penn State home football game, and some road games. I don't think they ever attended Penn State.

  12. #12
    NFL Owner monogodo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrCrassic View Post
    • Friendship is fake. When I was younger and inexperienced with the corporate environment, I enjoyed hustling and walking with the masses of people heading for their office jobs in the finance sectors of Manhattan. However, after spending a few months working inside of it (three months at a time), I quickly became disillusioned. Besides the usual office politics and complaints, every friendship that I saw; every social interaction I noticed; I got the impression that everything was just business. Nothing seemed genuine. I felt that people were concerned about others and their lives...until 5pm (or 6 or 7pm, in my case) came around. This feeling is amplified even more when juxtaposed with my current job, where a LOT of the relationships created here go way beyond work time (some people here even rely on that to stay). That's why I avoided making friends; I like making friends with people that will be worth it.
    Work is work, not a place to make friends.

    There's nothing wrong with being friendly with your coworkers, but not being friends with them, which is what it sounds like you're experiencing. That doesn't mean their friendship is fake, it's just situational.

    I spend 8+ hours per day with my coworkers. The last thing I want to do is hang out with them. Besides, we have different interests. You and your coworkers want to spend time outside of work with each other, that's great, too.
    198? Colnago Super (Campy Record) | 1989 Eddy Merckx 7-Eleven Team Issue (Dura Ace) | Catamount MFS (1x8) | Top Image Neptune (SS)

  13. #13
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebarerider View Post
    Let me just address your list in order. For some background on me, I'm 23 and recently considered all of these things (although I wanted to move North). This is just my take on it, of course. Discard it if you wish.

    -Being Happy

    People are not anymore unhappy in the North than they are in the South. I would venture a guess the problem here is projection; if you look out and think people are unhappy, they are unhappy. Get to know some people and test your hypothesis before making a conclusion like this.

    If it's not projection, and the people really are unhappy, you won't find much difference in the South unless it is on the surface. A lot of 'happiness' in the South is based on a polite exterior, which ties in with another point you made: you don't like fakeness. The South can be very fake.
    I will disclose a bit: in my attempts to find dates for the last year or so, I have tried to have conversation with many, many, many women. I've also made conversation with some men. What I have conjured is that very, very few are, at least on a surface, happy with their lives up to that point. Many dismay their lives after college, and many more get caught up in material intricacies. Some have a set life goal in mind, many don't.

    With the men, there was a bit more variation. It was definitely easier to talk to men (I wonder why...!)about general, everyday kind of things (though I usually talked about specific stuff). Some were obviously discontent with how things were going, others seemed indifferent.

    The main problem here is that these issues may not be specific to urban life. They could very well be shortcomings with my social skills (though I highly doubt it, since conversing with other people requires a decent amount), people being closed to others, or just the way life works. I do know that I'm tired of hearing most passer-by conversations (with people around my age or older) about how f'ed up they got last night.

    You're not trendy

    When you get a large group of people together (i.e., a community) there are people who fit in and people who don't. You will have to choose your evil, here -- if you don't like the types of trends in NYC, you may be more comfortable with the types of trends in the South. Then again, you might not. Traveling to N.C. for a short vacation is not a true picture of what the South is like. Vacation eyes are like drunk eyes--all the good things stand out, all the bad things fade into the background.
    I agree with this. I feel that the culture exhibited with many of the people my age involves partying, materialism, alcohol, and other activities/ideals I don't enjoy or partake in. However, I'm almost positive that this is a very shallow and overly general viewpoint. I'm sure there are groups that I'd fit into easier, but I haven't found them. I'm spending time now to search a lot more aggressively.

    Also, though three days is hardly experiencing NC, it's something. I'm thinking of using my summer internship to go away from NYC to give another area a try. What I do know is that I like the somewhat calmer atmosphere in NJ, and I (almost) always have.

    --Cycling

    You will find climbs and rural roads in some parts of the South, but there are major cities that run into suburb upon suburb in the South. And some parts of the South are also flat. The roads aren't all that smooth, either.

    The fact is, you should really wait to make a decision for at least another year (which you will because of college). Living in a place for a year isn't enough time, at least not IMO--then again, you don't want to be forever saying 'maybe next year I'll like it.' Of course, at this point, that isn't a valid concern.
    One year isn't a long time, but I've lived in Hoboken for two years, and had mostly the same resentment I'm sharing now. I'm thinking about it within the next year, while looking around. I don't have to make a decision for a while anyway.

    Thank you for your words. Very much appreciated, and most certainly not ignored!
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

  14. #14
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    Cowboy...cowboy...
    Well I'm packing up my game and I'm a head out west
    Where real women come equipped with scripts and fake breasts
    Find a nest in the hills chill like Flynt
    Buy an old droptop find a spot to pimp
    And I'm a Kid Rock it up and down your block
    With a bottle of scotch and watch lots of crotch
    Buy yacht with a flag sayin' chillin' the most
    Then rock that ***** up and down the coast
    Give a toast to the sun, drink with the stars
    Get thrown in the mix and tossed out of bars
    Sip the teajuna ...I wanna roam
    Find the old town chillin' fools then come back home
    Start an escort service, for all the right reasons
    And set up shop at the top of four seasons
    Kid Rock and I'm the real mccoy
    And I'm headin' out west sucker...because I wanna be a
    Cowboy baby
    With the top let back and the sunshine shining
    Cowboy baby
    West coast chillin? with the Boone's Wine
    I wanna be a Cowboy baby
    Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day
    Cowboy baby
    I can smell a pig from a mile away

    I bet you'll hear my whistle blowin' when my train rolls in
    It goes (whistle) like dust in the wind
    Stoned pimp, stoned freak, stoned out of my mind
    I once was lost, but now I'm just blind
    Palm trees and weeds, scabbed knees and rice
    Get a map to the stars, find Heidi Fleiss
    And if the price is right I'm gonna make my bid boy

    And let Cali-for-ny-aye know why they call me
    Cowboy baby
    With the top let back and the sunshine shining
    Cowboy baby
    West coast chillin? with the Boone's Wine
    I wanna be a Cowboy baby
    Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day
    Cowboy baby
    I can smell a pig from a mile away

    Yeah...Kid Rock...you can call me Tex
    Rollin' sunset woman with a bottle of Becks
    Seen a slimmy in a 'vette, rolled down my glass
    And said, "Yeah this **fits right in your **"
    No kiddin', *** slingin', spurs hittin' the floor
    Call me Hoss, I'm the Boss, with the sauce in the horse
    No remorse for the sherrif, in his eye I ain't right
    I'm gonna paint his town red, and paint his wife white HUH
    Cause chaos, rock like Amadeus
    Find West Coast ** for my Detroit players
    Mack like mayors, ball like Lakers
    They told us to leave, but bet they can't make us
    Why they wanna pick on me...lock me up and snort away my key
    I ain't no G, I'm just a regular failure
    I ain't straight outta compton I'm straight out the trailer
    Cuss like a sailor...drink like a Mc (mick...as in Irishman)
    My only words of wisdom are just, "Radio Edit."
    I'm flickin' my Bic up and down that coast and
    Keep on truckin' until it falls into motion

    Cowboy
    With the top let back and the sunshine shining
    Cowboy
    Spendin' all my time at Hollywood and Vine
    Cowboy
    Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day
    Cowboy
    I can smell a pig from a mile away
    Cowboy
    With the top let back and the sunshine shining
    Cowboy
    With the top let back and the sunshine shining
    Cowboy
    Hollywood and Vine
    Last edited by cohophysh; 10-01-08 at 04:05 PM.
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

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  15. #15
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    where in NC is your ex from?
    Winston-Salem.
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

  16. #16
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    Just leave, decision sounds insanely easy.

  17. #17
    fishologist cohophysh's Avatar
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    go west young man
    We cannot solve problems with the same level of consciousness that created them. A.E.

    1990 Diamond Back MTB
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  18. #18
    Splicer of Molecules Nickel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Darwin View Post
    Having moved from the SF Bay Area to Wilkes-Barre I can definitely understand your sentiments.
    That's a pretty big switch in locale.

  19. #19
    Squirrelly Member trsidn's Avatar
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    But the west is running out of water. Go ahead and check.
    The Carolinas I think would be a good bet. You still have some semblance of seasons....
    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Yet more proof that I'm.. well, pretty much right about everything.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Lamplight's Avatar
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    Okay, I'll try to add some more. I have one more con, and to many this wouldn't even be a con.

    6. This place is extremely religious and conservative. If you are either of these, you'll be in heaven (no pun intended). If not, well, there's no escaping these things here. You're surrounded by it all the time, and it shows in up in daily life almost constantly. I don't discuss either with my coworkers, but they discuss it constantly and assume I want to hear about it. And I don't mind hearing about it, until the talk turns to their hatred of anyone who isn't a hardcore conservative. Yet I can't really protest because I'll end up being known as "that liberal hippie" simply for disagreeing with them. And no, I'm not just assuming that would happen, it has happened to one of my coworkers. The rest practically hate her now. They don't seem to talk about religion as much, and that doesn't bother me anyway. Not to turn this political, I'm just saying that conservatism is a huge part of life here.

    Pros:

    1. The people who are actually nice here are ridiculously nice. Sometimes I let all the jerks get me down and forget that there are some genuinely good people in this area. Though very rare, I even have the occasional motorist treat me, as a cyclist, with the utmost respect and caution. I imagine this would be more common in a smaller town.

    2. Southerners are quite fascinated with Civil War history, and this place is full of history. As a matter of fact, I ride through a National Civil War Battlefield every morning on my way to work. You can go to the bookstore and find many, many books on local history, Civil War history, and even historic picture books of different towns. I find those especially interesting.

    3. Though it still gets cold, we have mild winters here. While I find the summers miserable, I must admit that I'm glad we don't have 4+ months of snow.

    4. Plants grow like crazy around here. If you want to grow your own food, this is a great place to do it!

    5. If you like to eat at restaurants, my town is the place to be. My town covers about 30 square miles, and there are something like 700 restaurants. Unfortunately, many of them are inaccessible by bike.

  21. #21
    King of the Plukers Spreggy's Avatar
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    Hi Crassic,
    Where did you grow up btw? It would be interesting to know where you're coming from.

    A bit of history to illustrate my thoughts on the matter:

    My first foray into city living was to Bridgeport, CT, the true sin city. What a hole, and I hated it. I grew up a towny, in western NY. I came from a very isolated environment, though I didn't really appreciate that fact at the time. My town had no blacks, hispanics, Muslims, or Jews. The culture shock threw me off track, and I longed for a more genuine, friendly and sensible lifestyle. That was college, like you.

    A few years later, I moved to downtown Rochester, after growing quite sick of the genuine, friendly and sensible lifestyle that I had returned to from Bridgeport. Loved it. Well what do ya know, I enjoyed this small city.

    Now my wife and I live a couple miles out of town, where we have a few acres and our neighbors couldn't hear us if we screamed in the yard. We were watching deer under the apple tree last night, and there's a red fox who is nearly on a first name basis with us.
    Been here 14 years, and we're thinking it would be fun after the kids are off to college to pick a cool city to live in.

    My point is it waxes and wanes, and I think you should go where your heart wants and your means allow. There are many, many ways to live, and no best way. You're unattached, which is of such value that I don't think you can appreciate until you aren't.

    So my recommendation is to think big and broad, knowing you can go cast your net anywhere in the world after school. Pick a cool place, then find the job, not the other way around. Go have a ball, you won't regret it.

    As for the south, well, I can't imagine an intelligent, worldly and educated African American gentleman such as yourself choosing to live in the home of racism and bigotry. Sorry southern people, but I know the territory, and it is what it is. Pride in bigotry is not something I would call a good environment.

    This was all from my "If I had it to do all over again" file.

    Good luck, sincerely!
    “Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”
    ― Muhammad Ali

  22. #22
    Senior Member Lamplight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spreggy View Post
    As for the south, well, I can't imagine an intelligent, worldly and educated African American gentleman such as yourself choosing to live in the home of racism and bigotry. Sorry southern people, but I know the territory, and it is what it is. Pride in bigotry is not something I would call a good environment.
    In years past I would have disagreed with you on this point, but unfortunately in recent years I've really begun to notice it all too much. I hear a lot of racist comments literally every single day, from numerous people I work with.

  23. #23
    Senior Member thebarerider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrCrassic View Post
    I agree with this. I feel that the culture exhibited with many of the people my age involves partying, materialism, alcohol, and other activities/ideals I don't enjoy or partake in. However, I'm almost positive that this is a very shallow and overly general viewpoint. I'm sure there are groups that I'd fit into easier, but I haven't found them. I'm spending time now to search a lot more aggressively.
    I hate hearing these conversations too. I just tune them out, though. If you want to PM me with any questions, I would be happy to talk with you. My perspective, of course, is the guy who stayed behind. I can tell you the pros and cons of this, in my particular situation.

  24. #24
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    He he...African American. Another one who got it wrong! (I'm Dominican, by the way. Don't worry, everyone gets it wrong. )

    I was born in Brooklyn. The part of Brooklyn that I live in now (Sunset Park) was vastly different, at least from the way I remember it from the years of my childhood. Streets were somewhat dangerous to walk through, due to the gangs that would congregate nearby at night. One street was infamous for nightly gang activity (fortunately, it wasn't ours). The school system was horrid; I clearly remember my sister's teacher being the obvious druggie, and I've had a few that left a LOT to be desired. Kids that failed classes and should have been retained moved up grades, simply to allow more kids to enter the system. It was pretty sad.

    With that said (and extra resources), my family decided to move into Bergenfield, NJ in December 1998. I hated my first year there because things were so different. People were "whack" (though I forgot I was even more so, considering I was trying to act and look gangster to gain some friends...which didn't work; I was way too nice). I grew into it, and by 9th grade, I would have never gone back. I was especially certain of that after my three-year foray into debate and meeting my first (now former ) girlfriend.

    I lived in Hoboken, NJ, the location of my school (BIG hint), up until last summer. Hoboken is kind of the "urban suburb" of NYC. It's full of history, but that can easily get lost under the HUGE city-like influences in the town. Tons of bars, restaurants, you name it. Unfortunately, a lot of the people were pretty much New Yorkers...so it was more or less like an early exposure to the city.

    Moved back to Sunset Park last August, and have disliked it since. My apartment is really nice, but most of my friends live either in Manhattan or Hoboken, so unless it's a woman that's coming over for the night, I don't get any visitors to my place. Which is sad, because it's about two times bigger than most of their apartments...but I digress.
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

  25. #25
    Senior Member MrCrassic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lamplight View Post
    In years past I would have disagreed with you on this point, but unfortunately in recent years I've really begun to notice it all too much. I hear a lot of racist comments literally every single day, from numerous people I work with.
    It's already pretty much established that racism will always be evident, so I just don't mind it. Fortunately, there have only been very few times where anyone gave me flack about my skin color.
    Ride more.

    Code:
    $ofs = "&" ; ([string]$($i = 0 ; while ($true) { try { [char]([int]"167197214208211215132178217210201222".substring($i,3) - 100) ; $i =
     $i+3 > catch { break >>)).replace('&','') ; $ofs=" " # Replace right angles with right curly braces

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