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Old 10-07-08, 05:11 PM   #1
timmyquest
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You ever have "these" friends

This guy isn't like the all star QB or anything (though, somehow he was our Prom king...that makes me laugh every time i think about it.). He didn't get a 36 on his ACT. On the surface he's just a pretty average guy.

I've talked to him about his upbringing and i've seen his parents interact with him and his siblings so i know for a fact that part of what i'm about to mention stems, very much, from them.

He is an extremely optimistic dude. That in itself isn't so bad but he's optimistic about things that are so off the wall that sometimes you just have to roll your eyes, sit back, and watch him try and do the things he wants to do. And he's always got things to do, new things every day sometimes he seems manic (kidding...sorta). I think it's because of this that his "failures" (and by that i mean those crazy ideas that never come through) are covered up by his new crazy ideas.

For a while now he's wanted to move to a city, which i wont mention*. I knew that would happen, but he kept also saying "Well, i'm gonna move out there and get a job with the [NBA Team of that city]"*

This idea was a typical one of his. It was so grandiose that you just nod and smile and wish him luck, secretly knowing that he'll go out there and settle for a "normal" job and enjoy living in his new city.

And then he calls me up to tell me he got this job at a search engine optimization company. This is a field i had never even thought of and he knows squat about computers, so we both laughed about it. Then he proceeds to tell me about how much he loves it. Which reminds me of another trait, he seems to find good things in everything he does.

I've tried this with him. At school he told me to come on a "bike ride" (in the 10 year old on 20" bikes sense, not in the road forum sense). So we go cruising around these nooks and crannies of Iowa City, and he glowingly tells me that "this is like...some sort of Hall of Fame or something". It turned out to be the athletic office where all the coaches have their official offices. It was interesting i guess, they have a Heisman in there (Kinnick's) and other trophies. But this was also the same place where, while writing a story for the school paper, he got a spur-of-the-moment interview with one of the highest paid football coaches in the Nation--not a very accessible guy and certainly not to the student newspaper.

And so i get a text message the other day that says "I got a job with the [NBA team]". I couldn't believe it. I called him right away and he told me that it is a small job, he prints out stats and hands them to the press and afterward hangs out in the visiting locker room to gather quotes. He also told me that this is the same job his boss started at.

On one hand i'm really happy for him. But on the other hand, i hate to admit, all this "jolly living" bothers me. I can't help it. I'm jealous. Where his parents are married, mine are divorced. Where his mom and dad visited him at school, mine never saw the campus (except for graduation). Where his grandma helped him to study abroad, i couldn't afford it. Where he has the gonads to pick up and leave with looming student loans, i live with "daddy" so i can build a savings account.

I sit here and fight being "angry" about his "luck" when i realize that it isn't luck. It's his positive attitude about everything he does. He is a beacon of "you can do it".

I'm sure many of us know these people, i'm probably just an ******* to ever get jealous in the first place but i think he's a good influence and i suspect "your" friend is too. Food for thought...

*I'm not saying where or what team because each team has two of these staff members, and it's all online...so for the sake of privacy i'll leave it to your imagination.
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Old 10-07-08, 05:49 PM   #2
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yep, life isnt fair. don't worry about him, you're only in a race against yourself, because the only person that started with your unique combination of upbringing, environment, family, friends, DNA, etc... is you. ideally, you'd be happy for him, happy with what you've been able to achieve yourself, and able to take a step back and figure out how to incorporate the better qualities into your own life (i.e., staying positive). Or you could just move into the mountains and live by yourself
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Old 10-07-08, 05:56 PM   #3
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No friends like that but I do have smart friends who are delusional about certain things and incredibly vain. At some level and it bugs the **** of of me that some of them could believe in the things that they do.
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Old 10-07-08, 06:01 PM   #4
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yep, life isnt fair. don't worry about him, you're only in a race against yourself, because the only person that started with your unique combination of upbringing, environment, family, friends, DNA, etc... is you. ideally, you'd be happy for him, happy with what you've been able to achieve yourself, and able to take a step back and figure out how to incorporate the better qualities into your own life (i.e., staying positive). Or you could just move into the mountains and live by yourself
No, at the end of the day i'm really happy for him. Mostly because i know when he's GM i'm gonna have some kick ass seats
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Old 10-07-08, 06:17 PM   #5
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This story for some reason reminds me of the movie " big fish". if you haven't seen i suggest you do. You can be a big fish in a small pond, or be a small fish in a big pond, it's all about your perspective.

When i was little, i wanted to be a helicopter pilot, an astronaut and a race care driver. When i told my friends i wanted to be a firefighter, they gave me the exact same response you gave your friend. when i did it, they were shocked. See, people that dream big aren't afraid to fail, they know that's part of the game. They also know, that the payoff is worth the risk, and that failure isn't a bad thing, unless you fail to follow your dreams. People like your friend, don't look at their naysayers with disdain, rather they feel sorry for them that they can't see the world through their own eyes, because if they did, there would be many more open doors.....
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Old 10-08-08, 10:43 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by timmyquest View Post
This guy isn't like the all star QB or anything (though, somehow he was our Prom king...that makes me laugh every time i think about it.). He didn't get a 36 on his ACT. On the surface he's just a pretty average guy.

I've talked to him about his upbringing and i've seen his parents interact with him and his siblings so i know for a fact that part of what i'm about to mention stems, very much, from them.

He is an extremely optimistic dude. That in itself isn't so bad but he's optimistic about things that are so off the wall that sometimes you just have to roll your eyes, sit back, and watch him try and do the things he wants to do. And he's always got things to do, new things every day sometimes he seems manic (kidding...sorta). I think it's because of this that his "failures" (and by that i mean those crazy ideas that never come through) are covered up by his new crazy ideas.

For a while now he's wanted to move to a city, which i wont mention*. I knew that would happen, but he kept also saying "Well, i'm gonna move out there and get a job with the [NBA Team of that city]"*

This idea was a typical one of his. It was so grandiose that you just nod and smile and wish him luck, secretly knowing that he'll go out there and settle for a "normal" job and enjoy living in his new city.

And then he calls me up to tell me he got this job at a search engine optimization company. This is a field i had never even thought of and he knows squat about computers, so we both laughed about it. Then he proceeds to tell me about how much he loves it. Which reminds me of another trait, he seems to find good things in everything he does.

I've tried this with him. At school he told me to come on a "bike ride" (in the 10 year old on 20" bikes sense, not in the road forum sense). So we go cruising around these nooks and crannies of Iowa City, and he glowingly tells me that "this is like...some sort of Hall of Fame or something". It turned out to be the athletic office where all the coaches have their official offices. It was interesting i guess, they have a Heisman in there (Kinnick's) and other trophies. But this was also the same place where, while writing a story for the school paper, he got a spur-of-the-moment interview with one of the highest paid football coaches in the Nation--not a very accessible guy and certainly not to the student newspaper.

And so i get a text message the other day that says "I got a job with the [NBA team]". I couldn't believe it. I called him right away and he told me that it is a small job, he prints out stats and hands them to the press and afterward hangs out in the visiting locker room to gather quotes. He also told me that this is the same job his boss started at.

On one hand i'm really happy for him. But on the other hand, i hate to admit, all this "jolly living" bothers me. I can't help it. I'm jealous. Where his parents are married, mine are divorced. Where his mom and dad visited him at school, mine never saw the campus (except for graduation). Where his grandma helped him to study abroad, i couldn't afford it. Where he has the gonads to pick up and leave with looming student loans, i live with "daddy" so i can build a savings account.

I sit here and fight being "angry" about his "luck" when i realize that it isn't luck. It's his positive attitude about everything he does. He is a beacon of "you can do it".

I'm sure many of us know these people, i'm probably just an ******* to ever get jealous in the first place but i think he's a good influence and i suspect "your" friend is too. Food for thought...

*I'm not saying where or what team because each team has two of these staff members, and it's all online...so for the sake of privacy i'll leave it to your imagination.
Is your friend's name, "Tony Robbins"? Seriously, though, dude sounds like Midas. You know those dudes who kind of bumble around but everything they touch turns to gold? Check it and go out there and do your thing.
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Old 10-08-08, 10:57 AM   #7
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Is your friend's name, "Tony Robbins"? Seriously, though, dude sounds like Midas. You know those dudes who kind of bumble around but everything they touch turns to gold? Check it and go out there and do your thing.
Yeah, that's kind of about right...
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Old 10-08-08, 11:17 AM   #8
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I think your friend figured out that he can have what he wants if he goes after it. A lot of people don't believe this.

Make your decisions about what you want, put your head down and start pushing thru any resistance, and damn the torpedoes.
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Old 10-08-08, 11:29 AM   #9
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Everyone has their bad sides. You probably don't know about his...or what he had to do to get that job.

I don't have any friends like that (even though I'm kind of like that, at least with my success rate with internships, clients for personal work, etc.)...but I did have one "envy" that I let go of relatively recently. My sister, who has a personality way different from mine, is very social. She can easily make friends and never seems to have trouble finding someone to hang out with. On the other hand, I've always had issues with this (though I've worked hard to resolve them during college...and did, somewhat).

I had another friend who had zero problems getting girls. The guy was a natural. He definitely had some personality flaws, but he could talk the talk and walk the walk (with women). On top of that, his dad worked at a car dealership, so while I had no car at all throughout all of high school (thank God!), he drove pretty nice cars often.

However, both of them envied me for some of my traits that are starting to help me out around now.

Being envious about someone is pretty dumb, anyway. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses, and one of the major challenges in life is to make ones weaknesses strengths. That involves learning from those that have what one doesn't have...
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Old 10-08-08, 11:31 AM   #10
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When i was little, i wanted to be a helicopter pilot, an astronaut and a race care driver. When i told my friends i wanted to be a firefighter, they gave me the exact same response you gave your friend. when i did it, they were shocked. See, people that dream big aren't afraid to fail, they know that's part of the game. They also know, that the payoff is worth the risk, and that failure isn't a bad thing, unless you fail to follow your dreams. People like your friend, don't look at their naysayers with disdain, rather they feel sorry for them that they can't see the world through their own eyes, because if they did, there would be many more open doors.....
C, I admire you for your optimism.
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Old 10-08-08, 11:39 AM   #11
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I sit here and fight being "angry" about his "luck" when i realize that it isn't luck. It's his positive attitude about everything he does. He is a beacon of "you can do it".
That's the key.

Edit:

Read: The Greatest Secret In The World by Og Mandino.
For that matter, read everything he wrote.
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.... Other than being completely wrong, you're correct.
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Old 10-08-08, 11:47 AM   #12
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I think it's just a matter of setting your mind to something and going for it. If you were to ask anyone in my family, when I want to do something there is nothing that stops me, I get obsessive; true. I plan to serve a 2 year mission for my church, I just decided that one day. I plan on going to spain and teaching english in this program that someone told me about, me and a friend are going to do it together. I also made a promise and/or bond to move to South AM for a year when I come back with my GF and/or best friend. We're thinking argentina. Getting jobs and living in a really nice apartment downtown. I know it sounds huge, but all life is is making a decision, going for it no matter what. If you do that I think you usually do it/ get it. Problem is I never set my mind to any kind of career or job, if I did I know I could get something awesome, I only set my mind to fun and games. I like doing things off a whim, I drove up solo a 15 hour drive to idaho to get my girlfriend and if it hadn't been for that stupid law we would've droven into mexico for the day. Acting on stupid ideas can seriously yield awesome results, and the best times of our lives. Just don't get shot or stabbed.
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