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Old 12-13-08, 12:29 AM   #1
Siu Blue Wind
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Childhood innocence RUINED!

By not-so-pure Christmas songs. Yep.

Seriously.

"I Saw Momma Kissing Santa Claus"
- Here we glorify adultery.

"Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer" - Discrimination at its best. And teaches one to USE someone because of their differences. What a shame.

"Santa Claus is Coming to Town"
- Oh this song threatens kids and instills fear in them. You BETTER watch out? I mean... WTH??

"Frosty the Snowman" - Poor little kid, with no real friends. And here the imaginary one dies. No wonder they get all anti social.

"I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas" - Yeah and so are the druggies around the corner from me.

"Jingle Bells"
- Somehow this got tied in with begging for money. You know, the ones with the buckets in front of stores uh...jingling?

I can never hear these songs and think of them as I did when I was a kid. *sigh*
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Old 12-13-08, 12:46 AM   #2
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thank you for adding to my holiday depression. So, not only was I not allowed to believe in Santa, but it turns out all my fave Christmas songs were not so innocent. Thanks.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:46 AM   #3
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"Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" - Preaching grandma hate!

"Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walkin' home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe"

Last edited by carbonlife; 12-13-08 at 01:09 AM.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:48 AM   #4
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And you haven't heard the spanish regeton versions ... nasty combinations of "Santa" and "Dale Fuete".
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Old 12-13-08, 12:49 AM   #5
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thank you for adding to my holiday depression. So, not only was I not allowed to believe in Santa, but it turns out all my fave Christmas songs were not so innocent. Thanks.
So what's the common theme here? Oh yeah, xmas!

Remove xmas, and you have nothing to worry about and all is well.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:49 AM   #6
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Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer - Preaching grandma hate!

"Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walkin' home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe"
Now wasn't there drinking booze involved here too? AHA!! DRUNK DRIVING!!!!
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:51 AM   #7
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So what's the common theme here? Oh yeah, xmas!

Remove xmas, and you have nothing to worry about and all is well.
OH KT would just loooooove this thread, wouldn't he?
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:54 AM   #8
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my sister always cried when frosty melted, and my mom had to turn the video off.
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Old 12-13-08, 12:55 AM   #9
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my sister always cried when frosty melted, and my mom had to turn the video off.
Heh, and Old Yeller was just a happy movie about a dog?
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Old 12-13-08, 12:55 AM   #10
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my sister always cried when frosty melted, and my mom had to turn the video off.
Hey! I cried when frosty melted.... still do.
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Old 12-13-08, 01:07 AM   #11
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Santa Cutie: Good lord! Has anyone actually listened to the lyrics of that song?
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Old 12-13-08, 01:09 AM   #12
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Or do you mean "Santa Baby"? About having him coming down her *ahem* chimney??

And don't forget "Merry Christmas Darling" by Karen Carpenter. Ya know, the one about how she's alone Christmas Eve? Didn't she starve herself to death? Total emo song.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

Last edited by Siu Blue Wind; 12-13-08 at 01:12 AM.
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Old 12-13-08, 01:14 AM   #13
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Christmas is brutal...just like life.


Get used to it.
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Old 12-13-08, 01:17 AM   #14
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Yes, that's the one! Santa Baby.

Karen Carpenter was either bulemic or anorexic. Can't remember which.
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Old 12-13-08, 01:29 AM   #15
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Walking in women underwear.

Not that there is wrong with it ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWmKScVBn9Y
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Old 12-13-08, 02:02 AM   #16
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I always preferred "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus" only to have it end up being mommy in disguise...

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Old 12-13-08, 02:04 AM   #17
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Walking in women underwear.

Not that there is wrong with it ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWmKScVBn9Y
Oh, thank goodness.

I was worried my neighbor with the video fetish had posted to youtube.
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Old 12-13-08, 05:43 AM   #18
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"Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer" - Discrimination at its best. And teaches one to USE someone because of their differences. What a shame.
The interpretation of the song could be, "rather that ridicule the differences among us, embrace them"
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Old 12-13-08, 06:05 AM   #19
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The interpretation of the song could be, "rather that ridicule the differences among us, embrace them"

Yes, but they didn't "embrace" Rudolf and his differences until they had a use for him.
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Old 12-13-08, 06:19 AM   #20
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my brother in law made an album of x rated xmas songs, which i kinda thought were on the tasteless side. (They were spoofs on the regular well known songs and had vulgarities, eg, I saw mommy ____ing Santa Claus, etc etc.)

I told a friend at work about it (this was many years ago) and to my surprise they insisted they wanted to hear it. I reluctantly brought the CD in and to my surprise they loved it. They even started spreading it around and plenty of other people wanted to buy a copy
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Old 12-13-08, 08:08 AM   #21
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Any moment, I'm expecting Seattle to ban the song "We Need a Little Christmas Now" for fear that it will incite homophobic violence due to the lyric "slice up the fruitcake."
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Old 12-13-08, 09:15 AM   #22
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Oh, we humans are a bizarre lot!!!!
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Old 12-13-08, 09:17 AM   #23
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Frosty The Snowman - Teaching the art of black magic?
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Old 12-13-08, 09:19 AM   #24
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Why do I get the feeling I was never innocent as a child?
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Old 12-13-08, 09:28 AM   #25
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I thought Rudolph's nose was red because he'd been in the booze.
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