Strippers, pools, and Pearl Jam
The where to get a lapdance thread reminded me of an experience over the summer.
I friend of mine flew in from Louisiana so we could go to a Pearl Jam concert so I took the week off back in June I think. We spent most of our time drinking beer and hanging out at the pool at my old apartment. Well one day we were hangin out by the pool doing our thing when this bleached blonde hair chick walks by wearing a way too small Corona bikini. At any rate, she gives a coyish wave as she goes by. We hop in the pool after that to cool off and she comes over and sits on the metal ladder thing at the deep end. She strikes up a conversation while she's got her legs up over the rails and is gyrating about. She proceeds to tell us that she has a MBA all the while molesting the ladder. At this point I realized she is very drunk. Messed up like a soup sandwich. And it's about 11:30am at this point. Now, I pride myself in having the ability to make fun of people to their face without their knowledge. And this was prime to do so. So while I's asking her how old she is and what she does for a living (she got out that she is 21) she starting commenting on how she hates tan lines and "accidentally" pulls her boobs out. Yep, complete fully out by the pool. She wasn't hot but she was stripper hot. After I subtly call her out on having an MBA and the 37 other bold face lies she told us she tells us she's a stripper at the uptown cabaret her in Charlotte. Now, I'm not particularly fond of strip clubs, I find myself in them often with a certain group of friends and co-workers. The buddy with me at the time was one of those guys. She was working that night and he asked what time. She said 10. He leaned over and told me what we were doing at 10. She went to her car and gave us a stack of get in free cards. I valued them at $300. What's really funny is that he was upset when she didn't remember who he was. This is one of the stories that I have where embellishment is not necessary.