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Old 01-26-09, 09:36 AM   #1
substructure
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The obligatory "How was your weekend?" and my rant

First off, what difference does it make? Will my response trigger some wave that will change the world in a meaningful way.

My weekend sucked. OK. But it's Monday, you're here, and now it doesn't seem to suck as much compared to this moment.

All they really want is a single word response anyway. If I pulled them into my office, sat them down, and really delved into how my weekend went, they would probably jam ice picks in their ears if they were available.

Normal response:

"How was your weekend?"
"Good"
"That's good."
"Yours?"
"Good"
"Good"
<pause>
"Well, I suppose."
"Yup"
"I got those TPS reports."
"Yup"
"See ya."
"See ya."

The way I want it to go:
"How was your weekend?"
"F - off."
"See ya."
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Old 01-26-09, 09:54 AM   #2
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Co-worker: How was your weekend?
Me: Great! I caught the red-eye to Vegas on Friday, went straight to the casino, won $10G, went to the bar and bought a round for everyone including a bachelorette party and ended up doing it w/ the bride, the maid of honor and one of the bridesmaids. The next night, I hit the strip and yadda yadda I woke up in the desert w/ no money and another nipple ring. How was yours?
Co-worker: About the same.
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Old 01-26-09, 10:40 AM   #3
substructure
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Originally Posted by jyossarian View Post
Co-worker: How was your weekend?
Me: Great! I caught the red-eye to Vegas on Friday, went straight to the casino, won $10G, went to the bar and bought a round for everyone including a bachelorette party and ended up doing it w/ the bride, the maid of honor and one of the bridesmaids. The next night, I hit the strip and yadda yadda I woke up in the desert w/ no money and another nipple ring. How was yours?
Co-worker: About the same.
Much better. Can I use it?
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Old 01-26-09, 10:45 AM   #4
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How was your weekend?

Oh, not great. I've told you I've been waking up next to dead hookers for the last few weeks, right? My doctor is prescribing higher and higher doses of anti-psychotics but I'm not really sure it's doing the job anymore. Well, this weekend, I woke up with two naked dead hookers and yet another bloody kitchen knife. Thank God it's Monday, but I'm starting to get a little annoyed with this place....
Sorry to ramble on like that, how was yours?
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Old 01-26-09, 04:05 PM   #5
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I say "swell" or "snazzy" and people imitate me like there is something wrong with using different words.
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Old 01-26-09, 04:26 PM   #6
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If you ask here in Costa Rica, they will tell you - which is a bit of a surprise the first time...
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Old 01-26-09, 04:29 PM   #7
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I only ask people about their weekend if I really care to hear the response, good or bad.

Coworker/friend gets: "Did you have a good weekend?" or "Do anything fun this weekend?" and I will stand and wait for a response.

Coworker I merely tolerate gets the drive-by: *while still walking past* "Hey. Mornin'". (not even "good" morning, which invites them to follow with a snarky "what's so good about it?" or other such nonsense.)
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Old 01-26-09, 07:53 PM   #8
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"I set into motion a series of events that will end the world as we know it. Then I went on a bike ride and got a colonoscopy. I have pictures of both, wanna see?"
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Old 01-26-09, 08:15 PM   #9
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This morning.

RP to co-worker 1, where fundie?
Co-worker 1, don't know he didn't call in.
Rp...you know what that means.
Co-worker...what?
Rp Free day cuss all we want GDit.
Co-worker 1....F yeah GD Fin' Spoot.
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Old 01-27-09, 09:14 AM   #10
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I wanna say " it was a weekend of crazy monkey lovin"

Yours?
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Old 01-27-09, 11:39 AM   #11
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I wanna say " it was a weekend of crazy monkey lovin"

Yours?
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