Advertise on Bikeforums.net



User Tag List

Results 1 to 12 of 12
  1. #1
    Nothing here to see!!!!!! flyingscotsman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Charlotte
    Posts
    487
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    The Husband Store...

    A store that sells husbands has just opened in Ottawa where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is comprised of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

    So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

    On the first floor the sign on the door reads: "Floor 1 - These men have jobs." The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.

    The second floor sign reads: "Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids." The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.

    The third floor sign reads: "Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking." "Hmmm, better." she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"

    The fourth floor sign reads: "Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, and help with the housework." "Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.

    The fifth floor sign reads: "Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak." "Oh, mercy me! But just think what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.

    The sixth floor sign reads: "Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,789,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please."

  2. #2
    Administrator CbadRider's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    On the bridge with Picard
    My Bikes
    Specialized Allez, Specialized Sirrus
    Posts
    5,840
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    I didn't realize this was a joke at first. I was going to ask if they accepted online orders.
    Quote Originally Posted by toddles View Post
    So Tom only hires people that are nutty? Is part of the requirement to be a moderator on this site is that you have to be nuts??
    Forum Guidelines *click here*

  3. #3
    Nothing here to see!!!!!! flyingscotsman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Charlotte
    Posts
    487
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by CbadRider View Post
    I didn't realize this was a joke at first. I was going to ask if they accepted online orders.

    You know that they have mail order brides, maybe I should go over to Scananavia and start a mail (male) order husband business.

  4. #4
    Grumpy Member trsidn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
    My Bikes
    Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200
    Posts
    234
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by flyingscotsman View Post
    You know that they have mail order brides, maybe I should go over to Scananavia and start a mail (male) order husband business.
    Could be. I think the main qualities they look for is to have a job and not drink so much.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariah View Post
    Transcendental enumeration.

  5. #5
    Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour ModoVincere's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    1,676
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    hmm....Husband for Rent might be a better business model.
    1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold

  6. #6
    AEO
    AEO is offline
    Senior Member AEO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    A Coffin Called Earth. or Toronto, ON
    My Bikes
    Bianchi, Miyata, Dahon, Rossin
    Posts
    12,255
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    lol... ottawa... this kind of store would be more fitting in the EU
    Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
    http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm

  7. #7
    Nothing here to see!!!!!! flyingscotsman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Charlotte
    Posts
    487
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
    hmm....Husband for Rent might be a better business model.
    That's already been done in the other countires

    Handymen husbands for rent in Argentina


    Buenos Aires, Oct 13 (IANS) Any woman can get a husband at an hourly rate in Buenos Aires, thanks to a company offering to do the repairs and installations that every home needs, and all “without problems in the bedroom”.Husband for Rent is a successful Argentine company that for 50 pesos ($15.50) an hour will undertake domestic chores for women who don’t have a “handyman” around the house, the Spanish news agency EFE reported.

    “Tired of your husband leaving you with all the household upkeep? And you, are you tired of your wife nagging at you to do 1,001 repairs? Stop arguing right now,” the company says on its Web site.

    The firm provides its long list of clients, mostly single or divorced women or widows, with a whole catalogue of electrical and electronic repairs, carpentry and plumbing jobs - although the company’s name has caused more than one misunderstanding among potential clients.

    “Some don’t get it and have made me insinuations, but I just do my job. Once a woman called at 3 o’clock in the morning to say she needed a man,” the company’s owner, Daniel Alonso, told Efe.

    According to the businessman, one of the craziest moments he has had with his company was when a male prostitute sent him an e-mail saying that if he couldn’t cope with all his female clients, “he could help him with the jobs”.

    “And once a woman left a message on the answering service saying that “my name is Cristina, I am 56 and need a complete servicing”, Alonso said.

    The entrepreneur said that these and similar stories have given Husband for Rent a blacklist of people who are not answered when they call.

    The odd anecdotes have been accumulating since 12 years ago, when Daniel, an electronics technician, started the company with his wife, a key figure in its foundation.

    “It all began when an elderly neighbour asked my wife if she could borrow her husband. It occurred several times until my wife answered: ‘I’ll rent him to you.’ And so the name of the company was born,” said Alonso, who claims to have 2,000 clients.

    The company’s impact was so great that more than one firm wanted to use the same system. “I’ve presented several letters and documents because they have tried to copy my service. I even registered the name so clients wouldn’t mistake our service for someone else’s,” the 56-year-old Alonso said.

    “The name is important, but the service is also very good because I do repairs in all sectors. Working in several companies gave me the experience and know-how to do all kinds of repairs,” he said.

    Alonso recommends that his clients call him when they have a number of jobs to do, “because the first hour is charged complete but starting with the second hour we start charging by fractions of an hour.”

    In his opinion, the possibility of doing several different repairs for a client is one of the secrets of his success, since it turns out to be a good deal for both sides.

    “It gives me more hours of work and for the client it’s cheaper than calling an electrician, a plumber and a carpenter individually,” he said.

    So the technician can begin repairing a lamp, then go on to plane some doors, install a telephone system and even fix up a piece of furniture that was about to be thrown out.

    “Satisfied?” Alonso asks after finishing each job. And he says that most answers are in the affirmative.

  8. #8
    Grumpy Member trsidn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Putting the 'fun' in dysfunctional
    My Bikes
    Cannondale CAAD8, Trek SU200
    Posts
    234
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    [quote=flyingscotsman;8342953]That's already been done in the other countires

    Handymen husbands for rent in Argentina


    Buenos Aires, Oct 13 (IANS) Any woman can get a husband at an hourly rate in Buenos Aires, thanks to a company offering to do the repairs and installations that every home needs, and all “without problems in the bedroom”.Husband for Rent is a successful Argentine company that for 50 pesos ($15.50) an hour will undertake domestic chores for women who don’t have a “handyman” around the house, the Spanish news agency EFE reported.

    quote]

    what, no fringe benefits?
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariah View Post
    Transcendental enumeration.

  9. #9
    superArti artifice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Minnersoter
    My Bikes
    2007 Fuji Professional 2.0, 2009 GTw Avalanche 2.0
    Posts
    1,058
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    ha, good one! L
    Quote Originally Posted by CbadRider View Post
    I didn't realize this was a joke at first. I was going to ask if they accepted online orders.



    I think my ideal floor would be employed, handy around the house, and easy on the eyes. An added bonus would be eating my experimental recipes anyway, and telling me "its not that bad". (telling me its "good" would be a blatant lie, and I'm not that stupid).
    i woke up one morning and i stepped out of bed | had to get a bike, had to paint it red
    Of all the treasures I have, it’s the memories that are the most precious.

  10. #10
    AEO
    AEO is offline
    Senior Member AEO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    A Coffin Called Earth. or Toronto, ON
    My Bikes
    Bianchi, Miyata, Dahon, Rossin
    Posts
    12,255
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    if they keep telling you it's "good", you should just keep feeding him really food items that had their sugar and salt mixed up
    Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
    http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm

  11. #11
    Who farted? Ka_Jun's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Pittsburgh, PA
    My Bikes
    '06 K2 Zed 3.0, '09 Novara Buzz V
    Posts
    1,287
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

  12. #12
    Riding Heaven's Highways on the grand tour ModoVincere's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    1,676
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Quote Originally Posted by artifice View Post
    ha, good one! L




    I think my ideal floor would be employed, handy around the house, and easy on the eyes. An added bonus would be eating my experimental recipes anyway, and telling me "its not that bad". (telling me its "good" would be a blatant lie, and I'm not that stupid).
    Bet I could make you believe that lie. Or you wouldn't care if its a lie...either way its a win win.
    1 bronze, 0 silver, 1 gold

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •