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  1. #1
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    How do you cut something 6 ft down to 8 ft?

    That's right, one of the senior officers at work just told me to take a 6ft tube and cut it down to 8ft. Speechless...

  2. #2
    Non Tribuo Anus Rodentum and off to the next adventure (RIP) Stacey's Avatar
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    What a dolt! Anyone worth their 'Journeyman's Card" knows that a tube STRETCHER is what's needed.

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    Tell him you cut it 3 times,and it's still too short
    Joat
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    My bike aint fancy, but I can pedal all day.

  4. #4
    Senior Member spazegun2213's Avatar
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    your answer should have been "are you sure 8 is big enought, i can cut this 6ft tube and make it 12ft?"

    LOL!!!
    '11 allez Comp, very specialized & '09 Pinarello Pista, that only turns left
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  5. #5
    more ape than man timmhaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slvoid
    That's right, one of the senior officers at work just told me to take a 6ft tube and cut it down to 8ft. Speechless...
    don't ask questions...just do it!

  6. #6
    Banned. DnvrFox's Avatar
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    Cut it into two four foot sections and glue them together!

  7. #7
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Lol, some of you guys think I'm joking but I'm dead serious. This guy points to a tube that's barely taller than me leaning up against a wall and says, "you can take that and cut it down to 8 ft." My heart rate went up 20 beats and I just turned red trying not to laugh. Went back to him an hour later saying, "I couldn't find anything long enough" and he just let the issue die there.

    I don't know how I can possibly work under a senior engineer like that.

  8. #8
    Tiocfáidh ár Lá jfmckenna's Avatar
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    Maybe he is a motivational speaker.

  9. #9
    bab
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    Sounds like you work for the same company as Dilbert..
    I know I do..

    Last Halloween, they CIO made it mandatory to dress up for morale reasons!

  10. #10
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Seriously this guy's a ******. Last month he told me to "turn it on, make sure it runs first before installing the batteries" to a battery powered device...

    He is the only engineer I know where I've used the term flux capacitor in an engineering discussion only to have it fly over his head.

  11. #11
    cxmagazine dot com pitboss's Avatar
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    the only way this would be possible:
    Cut the 6ft section into a 4 ft section and a 2ft section
    put the 2ft section to the side for now
    take the 4ft section and cut it in half, lengthwise
    take the two 4ft half sections and put them together, one end to one end,
    this will give you an 8ft section
    the person who asked you to do this said nothing about maintaining integrity of the initial design
    if you are reprimanded for 'thinking outside the box,' grab the 2ft section and hit the person with it.
    Deathlap - cyclocross, training, beer,...escape hatch

  12. #12
    hateful little monkey jim-bob's Avatar
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    I did a horrible party gig in a white tent a while back. The client wanted me to "light the walls so they look black."

    I had to explain that I was all out of black gel.

  13. #13
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by [165]
    the only way this would be possible:
    Cut the 6ft section into a 4 ft section and a 2ft section
    put the 2ft section to the side for now
    take the 4ft section and cut it in half, lengthwise
    take the two 4ft half sections and put them together, one end to one end,
    this will give you an 8ft section
    the person who asked you to do this said nothing about maintaining integrity of the initial design
    if you are reprimanded for 'thinking outside the box,' grab the 2ft section and hit the person with it.
    I thought of this much too late but I was gonna tell him that, "I'll try to smelt down the aluminium and craft you a new longer but slightly thinner tube"

  14. #14
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MERTON
    maybe you should talk to his boss? and what is a flux capacitor? sounds like something out of back to the future.
    It's what makes time travel possible.
    1.21 gigawatts!!!

  15. #15
    hateful little monkey jim-bob's Avatar
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    I thought that was 'jiggawatts'.

  16. #16
    bab
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    Quote Originally Posted by slvoid
    It's what makes time travel possible.
    1.21 gigawatts!!!
    Funny that a lot of my coworders and I use that term when we are mimicking someone whom thinks they know the technology talk but we know they are full of BS..

  17. #17
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Haha, well I think the term is gigawatts but he pronounced it, "jiggawatts."

    This morning one of my coworkers and I was explaining something to this guy and while he was on the phone leaving a voice mail to an engineer at another company, I said, "I'm pretty sure it's the flux capacitor in the circuit board that makes it remember stuff when it loses power" really really loud. I'm pretty sure that's now in the background noise in his voicemail.

    This guy's full of BS alright...

  18. #18
    bab
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    We do antoher fun thing to the guys who are full of it and like to throw buzz words around. When there is a problem, we go up to them and make something up that sound really technical. 5 minutes later you will hear them talking to some of the end users and Regurgitate the exact thing we told them but they are making it like they found the answer..

    Slvoid, one day we will have to compare notes. I am in a very similar situation

  19. #19
    2-Cyl, 1/2 HP @ 90 RPM slvoid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bab
    We do antoher fun thing to the guys who are full of it and like to throw buzz words around. When there is a problem, we go up to them and make something up that sound really technical. 5 minutes later you will hear them talking to some of the end users and Regurgitate the exact thing we told them but they are making it like they found the answer..

    Slvoid, one day we will have to compare notes. I am in a very similar situation
    Haha that's exactly my situation. The guy comes up and has me explain to him things like 5-6 times over the course of a day before he goes up to the superiors to tell them about the progress then makes it seem like he did all the work.
    I don't think you can compare though, this guy's surpremely stupid.

  20. #20
    I drink your MILKSHAKE Raiyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slvoid
    this guy's surpremely stupid.
    He's smart enough to be your boss.

    Sorry that was too easy the guy does sound like a complete moron though

  21. #21
    Senior Member Harry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jim-bob
    I thought that was 'jiggawatts'.
    It is in French!!!

    I use the word this way and when I go to Ireland I get the odd funny look but the feckers don't know much further than the word itsel. Hah

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by slvoid
    Seriously this guy's a ******. Last month he told me to "turn it on, make sure it runs first before installing the batteries" to a battery powered device...

    He is the only engineer I know where I've used the term flux capacitor in an engineering discussion only to have it fly over his head.
    Is this why he is managment?
    I . . can . . . doooo . . . it

  23. #23
    bab
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    Quote Originally Posted by slvoid
    Haha that's exactly my situation. The guy comes up and has me explain to him things like 5-6 times over the course of a day before he goes up to the superiors to tell them about the progress then makes it seem like he did all the work.
    I don't think you can compare though, this guy's surpremely stupid.
    OH I don't know.... One day we will have to compare stories and see.. Today for example, I was told by the head honcho at 8:30 that I won't be needed in the 9 oclock meeting until about 10 because the first part was just about the facilities... Then at 8:59, he comes to my desk and asks if I am ready and that everyone is waiting..
    He reads all the trade rags and then tries to tell us what to do the buzz word tricks.. Last time we let him change something, after he insisted it was the right answer and I didn't really feel like debating it anymore. He broke every machine in the company and then BLAMED me because "I didn't stop him from doing making the change"..

  24. #24
    TX Ciclista CarlJStoneham's Avatar
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    He is the only engineer I know where I've used the term flux capacitor in an engineering discussion
    Sweet Jesus Anyone who can say that sentence in a meeting is my hero
    Last edited by CarlJStoneham; 07-23-04 at 10:02 AM.

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