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Thread: Gigantic spider

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    Gigantic spider

    I just finished baking bread, was putting water on for tea, I turned around to look out the back doorway that's in the kitchen when in lumbered one of the largest fracking spiders I have ever seen. I'm highly arachnophobic so once my brain processed what my eyes didn't want to believe I screamed, loud. I started to violently shake all over, thinking there's no one home upstairs to "save me" so I told the evil arachnid "YOU. DO NOT MOVE" as it was just below the door and I had to step over it to escape outside. I ran around the side of the house and YAY my landlord was just coming home. I could barely speak. Mostly it was "HUGE.SPIDER.NEAR.DOOR" I had previously warned him of my arachnophobia so he went and got a container to catch it in. He put it in the alley. Hopefully the thing doesn't come back. Christ, it was ENORMOUS.

    I'm still shaking hard enough I can barely type. I really hate spiders. Dammit.

  2. #2
    Senior Member GP's Avatar
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    Was it a homing spider?

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    What the hell is a homing spider?

    I'm not sure what species it was, possibly Giant House Spider but seemed too clumsy/floor dwelling to be one of those one. Seriously one of the largest ones I've ever seen in person, which is a very bad thing. I'm fighting the urge to go into full Panic Attack mode thinking there's more outside just waiting to come in here and bite me or something. Auggghghg.

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    Senior Member GP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    What the hell is a homing spider?

    I'm not sure what species it was, possibly Giant House Spider but seemed too clumsy/floor dwelling to be one of those one. Seriously one of the largest ones I've ever seen in person, which is a very bad thing. I'm fighting the urge to go into full Panic Attack mode thinking there's more outside just waiting to come in here and bite me or something. Auggghghg.
    They'll come back to their home. Which is also your home.

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    Great...

    Friend told me a squirt *** with windex in it kills 'em dead.

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    Senior Member GP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    Great...

    Friend told me a squirt *** with windex in it kills 'em dead.
    I thought that pissed them off more.

    Try it and tell us the results.

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    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    Great...

    Friend told me a squirt *** with windex in it kills 'em dead.
    So would a flamethrower.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyril View Post
    Ride what and in what manner pleases you. Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind. srsly.
    Community guidelines

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    Don't want to burn my place down along with the spider, lol.

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    Senior Member GP's Avatar
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    Just spray some WD40 on him. While holding a lighter to the stream.

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    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    Maybe it was a tarantula. Did you know they can leap up to twelve feet?

    At least we don't get camel spiders over here.

    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  11. #11
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    I bet if you get rid of your tuffet, curds and whey, the spider will find someone else to sit beside.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    Tarantulas are not indigenous to the Lower Mainland of BC. I am not sure they exist in the Northern at all. We make up for it with our Hobo Spiders, Black Widows, Wolf Spiders and Giant House Spiders though.

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    Senior Member DocM's Avatar
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    Please tell me that camel spider pic is a fake. Please.

    I got bit by a black widow many years ago when I was a kid, and I've been very arachnophobic since then.

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    I think it's a trick of perspective, DocM, I think the arachnid is actually relatively small or something. Unless you live in the middle east, I wouldn't worry about it anyway.

    I meant to type "North" in my previous post but load errors are hiding "Edit" from me again.

    I learned my arachnophobia from my mother, but there were several terrifying incidents over the years that made it much worse. I remember walking to school as a kid, felt something on my head, reached up and a huge (from my perspective) spider + web was tangled up in my hair. AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHH.

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    Senior Member Nota's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    Great...

    Friend told me a squirt *** with windex in it kills 'em dead.
    Yeah. You squirt them in the eyes to temporarily blind them, then turn the squirt *** around and ******-whip them to death with the business end.
    When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he'd learned in seven years. Mark Twain (apocryphal)

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    Senior Member Nota's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    I'm still shaking hard enough I can barely type. I really hate spiders. Dammit.
    Nothing to be ashamed about. Why, the "leader of the free world" for the past eight years, suffered from Iraqnophobia.
    When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he'd learned in seven years. Mark Twain (apocryphal)

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    BF's Level 12 Wizard SingingSabre's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
    Maybe it was a tarantula. Did you know they can leap up to twelve feet?

    At least we don't get camel spiders over here.

    Quote Originally Posted by DocM View Post
    Please tell me that camel spider pic is a fake. Please.

    Sort of. It's two camel spiders together. And there are some perspective twists making them look MUCH larger than they actually are. Full story here.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bklyn
    Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.

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    I have seen a couple of largish spiders, about the size of my open hand in span...Once in the
    kitchen an once in the garage.

    The main thing I remember is that they were incredibly fast.

    I wish I knew what 'brand' of spider they were...

    I live in central Kentucky.

    Jerry

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    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    yrrej, sounds too big to be a wolf spider, I'm glad I don't live down there!

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    BF's Level 12 Wizard SingingSabre's Avatar
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    I have a spider the size of a saucer about 10' away from me. Her name is Satinka and she's a sweetheart.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bklyn
    Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.

  21. #21
    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    Pet tarantula? Don't invite me over, lol. Then again, I have a pet rat and a lot of people are terrified of him, which makes no sense. He's domesticated.

    I'm worried about what species the beast is. It was HUGE. I immediately assumed it was a Giant house spider but perhaps it was a REALLY big Wolf spider. Wish I had taken a photo of it, could send it to an Arachnologist at one of the universities up here. Years ago I found a freaky spider near my place, I couldn't resist taking photos of it, with a buttercup next to it for scale. Sent the photos to a bug scientist and found out it was a spider that normally stays underground, a Trapdoor spider and that I was very lucky to have seen one.


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    Senior Member Michigander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luddite View Post
    I'm still shaking hard enough I can barely type. I really hate spiders. Dammit.

    Bring back the Sig Test!


    (\__/)
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  23. #23
    Mrs. DataJunkie Luddite's Avatar
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    ^ LOL

    I love that.

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