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Old 09-25-09, 09:33 PM   #26
Siu Blue Wind
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11: Not to do a road gap when there's a strong headwind.
Wait. What happened when you did this?
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:36 PM   #27
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9.) Never ask a man to marry you in Italy at a beautiful villa when he favors Germany.
Even if the villa looks like this?

http://www.rentvillas.com/PropertyDe...200909FreeStay
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Now get on your cheap bike and give me a double century. You walking can of Crisco!!

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Old 09-25-09, 09:37 PM   #28
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Wait. What happened when you did this?
Came up short clipped something with the rear wheel landed awkwardly on my left leg, tearing the acl and knocking me out.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:40 PM   #29
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Oh that's right. At least you didn't break bones. I really wish that you would be careful. Knocking yourself out is not good for your brain. And think about your acl. That might give you problems later on down the line. Please be careful.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:41 PM   #30
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Never fake the funk on a nasty dunk. Its bad juju.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:41 PM   #31
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Don't forget to tell the girl you will be out late with the guys...
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Old 09-25-09, 09:41 PM   #32
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Yeah. Just like that. *sigh*
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-25-09, 10:08 PM   #33
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No matter when you buy a house, in a buyer's market like this one, the same house you *didn't* buy will be cheaper next week.
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Old 09-25-09, 10:23 PM   #34
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Unfortunately the list of things I learned the hard way is too long to type while the things I learned the easy way could probably be covered in a haiku.
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Old 09-26-09, 04:23 AM   #35
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14.) Never take a haiku too seriously. Never know who has actually written it.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-26-09, 04:30 AM   #36
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never rub your eyes when chopping chillie peppers.
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Old 09-26-09, 08:31 AM   #37
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15) the reason your SO doesn't like to ride bikes doesn't have a relationship to the cost of their bike.

Corrollary) An expensive bike is not necessarily a deeply appreciated birthday present.
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Old 09-26-09, 08:34 AM   #38
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16- Things we learned the hard way?....Hmmmmm? OK, I've got one, Never wipe hard when using one ply toilet paper. BTW, Hope you feel better soon Siuy.
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Old 09-26-09, 08:40 AM   #39
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17. Never try to see how far you can ride with your eyes closed. It's only fun for awhile.
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Old 09-26-09, 08:47 AM   #40
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Never fry bacon while naked.
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Old 09-26-09, 11:18 AM   #41
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casually munch on carrots.

enter elevator.

begin sneezing.

-stolen from Letterman.
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Old 09-26-09, 06:18 PM   #42
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17. Never try to see how far you can ride with your eyes closed. It's only fun for awhile.
My nephew did that. He hit the mirror on a parked truck with his face. Went to the ER.
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Old 09-26-09, 06:19 PM   #43
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20.) Never bear down HARD on a folding knife that has a safety that you have to push toward the blade to release.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-26-09, 06:28 PM   #44
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21) Don't put good booze in an "unbreakable", but cheap, flask.

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Old 09-26-09, 06:30 PM   #45
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21a. Never walk through the backyard where there are no animals allowed in the townhouses and then walk thru Mother's house with a dog poo shoe. I.Haz.poo.foot SOB

I know the little $$#&*% who laid the log too. IT lives next door. Am saying something tomorrow to them too. Leash laws baybeh - either that or go to the Dog Park that has now been enacted by ME, who has been voting on and working for the last couple years opening up Monroe County parks to legal offroad riding and yeah - the damned dog park thing was hooked on to the plan.

Sorry, rant off
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Old 09-26-09, 06:34 PM   #46
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never rub your eyes when chopping chillie peppers.
Nor should one come near nostrils or private parts!
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Old 09-26-09, 10:51 PM   #47
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1) Get married
2) Get divorced
3) Get married again
4) Get divorced again
somebody's calling mah?
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Old 09-26-09, 11:16 PM   #48
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Don't try to be nice to stinging insects that find their way into your home by attempting to catch them with a towel and let them back outside.
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Old 09-26-09, 11:28 PM   #49
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Do not borrow your mother's ring, to fake propose to your girlfriend. It is always nice to see whether she will say yes in the future or not though. Unless she changes her mind because you just put her through such an emotional ordeal for nothing.
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Old 09-27-09, 12:04 AM   #50
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20.) Never bear down HARD on a folding knife that has a safety that you have to push toward the blade to release.
I hear duct tape will fix that right up.
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