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Old 09-25-09, 07:02 PM   #1
Siu Blue Wind
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Things we learned the hard way.

1.) The best way to get attention while suffering an asthma attack so bad to where you are starting to lose consciousness is to collapse on your back sprawled out on top of a huge bin of cantaloupes and start pushing said melons over the side, making them burst.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

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Old 09-25-09, 07:05 PM   #2
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OH SIU!!!! Hope yer OK!
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Old 09-25-09, 07:10 PM   #3
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Tonite.

Went down to lovely Vietnamese restaurant - purchased their lovely Pho soup - telling them beforehand I want it extra hot.

Get home and build my bowl (their broth is soooo out of this world) and so put veggies in and the beef (beef special: mix of flank steak, brisket, rare steak, tendon, tripe and a different kind of cut up meatball - pho dac biet) and proceed. Not thinking I toss in mouth a whole "string bean" and crunch and munch and OOOOYYYYYYYYY - raw green thai chili!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's now 15 minutes later and my mouth is back to normal. Man alive that was HOT!

Lesson: Do inspect veggies before chewing on them! But oh the dish is most awesome - WHEW!
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Old 09-25-09, 07:14 PM   #4
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3.) While gargling with a mouthwash, don't hesitate to spit it out before you violently sneeze. Cool Mint Listerine does not evoke a cooling feeling when traveling up through your sinuses and ear canals and exiting your face at 200 mph.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

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Old 09-25-09, 07:16 PM   #5
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Tude, I made some ceviche about a week or so ago. I threw in some chilis. Since they were small, I figured it wouldn't add much heat. I was wrong. What is worse is I fed some to our cook who is Tica and therefore doesn't eat hot food. I think I nearly poisoned her!

It was hot, not terrible, but more than anyone else will eat. Tasted really good though!
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Old 09-25-09, 07:22 PM   #6
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1.) The best way to get attention while suffering an asthma attack so bad to where you are starting to lose consciousness is to collapse on your back sprawled out on top of a huge bin of cantaloupes and start pushing said melons over the side, making them burst.
Wow, that's bad!

Most folks just lose consciousness...
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Old 09-25-09, 07:22 PM   #7
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3.) While gargling with a mouthwash, don't hesitate to spit it out before you violently sneeze. Cool Mint Listerine does not evoke a cooling feeling when traveling up through your sinuses and ear canals and exiting your face at 200 mph.
hehe - to add on.

Whilst eating a semi dry cereal with milk - do not try to talk to a student as a stray piece of cereal will be sucked in and lodge in windpipe causing massive coughing exercises - while signaling student (who is now looking like they need to proceed with CPR on you) to stand down - I'll be OK, as I'm trying to not cough more and also wipe tears from eyes. Oh and meanwhile try to look normal and not scare students out of office, hehe

Lesson: Don't talk while eating, or use more milk on cereal. hehe
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Old 09-25-09, 07:24 PM   #8
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Wow, that's bad!

Most folks just lose consciousness...

I fixed your spelling for you. You quoted me wrong.



5.) Duct tape makes a great emergency band aid when a regular sized band aid just won't help close that slash you just put in your tummy. Just be sure to tuck the flesh back in and try to dry the area before application.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

Last edited by Siu Blue Wind; 09-25-09 at 07:28 PM.
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Old 09-25-09, 07:31 PM   #9
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I fixed your spelling for you. You quoted me wrong.



5.) Duct tape makes a great emergency band aid when a regular sized band aid just won't help close that slash you just put in your tummy. Just be sure to tuck the flesh back in and try to dry the area before application.


Haz nothing to add here but
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Old 09-25-09, 07:40 PM   #10
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Is cantaloupes a euphemism?
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Old 09-25-09, 07:56 PM   #11
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siu and canta... nvm

if you want attention, you do what my neighbour just did.
make a racket outside at 10pm.
I hate my neighbour.
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Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
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Old 09-25-09, 07:59 PM   #12
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Falling doesn't hurt. The sudden stop at the end can cause serious damage.
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Old 09-25-09, 08:37 PM   #13
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1.) The best way to get attention while suffering an asthma attack so bad to where you are starting to lose consciousness is to collapse on your back sprawled out on top of a huge bin of cantaloupes and start pushing said melons over the side, making them burst.
OK, Damn. I love Cantaloupes.
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Old 09-25-09, 08:41 PM   #14
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I was spread eagle on top of something like this trying to get air into my lungs:



But I was in the back of a cold warehouse with a bunch melons and a couple of forklifts.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-25-09, 08:49 PM   #15
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6. (I think we're up to 6, anyway): Always, always curl fingertips under when holding a foodstuff you're slicing or chopping with that nice big 10" chef's knife. But if you don't, rest assured that fingerprints are not eradicable- they'll come back. Eventually.
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Old 09-25-09, 08:58 PM   #16
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7)? minute maid bottles and powerade bottles are made of sihtty plastic that breaks VERY easily when they fall as short as three feet. so if you think you may be too small to carry two 24 packs of powerade, don't do it... they will end up on the floor and the company will blame two cases of powerade loss on you.

-the small girl who thought she could
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Old 09-25-09, 09:03 PM   #17
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My first serious lesson on a bike happened when I was about 12 or so. I don't know if there are still any around but back then some roads were covered with cinders instead of gravel.

Cinders were the residue from coal being burned. Tough and sharp as glass. I'm coming down a paved hill on my first "English" bike. I'm flying. At the bottom of the hill is an intersection with a cinder road.

Now I don't remember much about the trip over the bars but I definitely remember having cinders dug out of my face. Even more special were the ones in my lower lip. Ah, those were the days.

That was a lesson learned.

Best regards,

Mike
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Old 09-25-09, 09:06 PM   #18
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8. don't poke your friend who has a lot to talk about a subject on your mind when you want to go to sleep.
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Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm
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Old 09-25-09, 09:11 PM   #19
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9.) Never ask a man to marry you in Italy at a beautiful villa when he favors Germany.
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:12 PM   #20
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I want to sleep, my friend has a lot to talk about the subject
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Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm
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Old 09-25-09, 09:19 PM   #21
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Quote:
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1.) The best way to get attention while suffering an asthma attack so bad to where you are starting to lose consciousness is to collapse on your back sprawled out on top of a huge bin of cantaloupes and start pushing said melons over the side, making them burst.
1) Get married
2) Get divorced
3) Get married again
4) Get divorced again
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Old 09-25-09, 09:21 PM   #22
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10: telling your gf you crashed will bring a lot of nagging
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Old 09-25-09, 09:28 PM   #23
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11: Not to do a road gap when there's a strong headwind.
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Old 09-25-09, 09:31 PM   #24
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13: do not eat extra spicy food before a ride
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Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm
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Old 09-25-09, 09:33 PM   #25
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14.) Never play "Throw the cat toy into the cone" when cat is wearing said cone. (They get revenge at nights when you are sleeping)
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Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.
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