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  1. #1
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Housemate Wanted:

    Am seeking a housemate to share a beautiful 4 bedroom house in a wonderful neighbourhood.

    Rent will include the main floor master bedroom and shared use of the main floor of the house, utilities, cable internet, laundry, and unlimited long distance.

    I am close to everything.

    I don't mind sharing the cooking duties... I am a gourmet chef.

    If you ride a bicycle this will be like heaven as I am an experienced mechanic and won't mind helping you keep your bike in prime condition and am always giving away free schwag.

    If I find I can trust you I might even let you ride / borrow one of my bikes.

    The successful applicant must like small dogs and children, should be able to pass a security check and lease conditions, should be neat and tidy, gainfully employed,and most importantly should be physically unattractive and perhaps even repulsive, should shun contact with members of the opposite (or same sex), and have no interest whatsoever in "shacking up" with anyone and moving out with a week's notice.

    A written vow of celibacy may be required.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Snicklefritz's Avatar
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    at first I thought you were asking for advice on a personals ad.

  3. #3
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    I thought I would be flooded with applications already...

    I should add that women (and some men) may feel strangely drawn to me and want to tear off their clothes and offer themselves so that I might ravish them repeatedly but I am taken with a capital T.

    If you are subject to wanton urges or have boundary issues you need not apply.

    Seriously... I need to find a nun for a housemate.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    Have you tried the local convent?

  5. #5
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    I will call them tomorrow.

    I will want a sister who is firm in her vows and will not be tempted as a novitiate might be.

    But then they would probably want to convert me.

  6. #6
    AEO
    AEO is offline
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    I thought of applying, but then I realized I'd only wear skimpy clothing around you.
    Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
    http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm

  7. #7
    Domestic Domestique UnsafeAlpine's Avatar
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    PM sent.

  8. #8
    K2ProFlex baby! ilikebikes's Avatar
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    My response would have been something along the lines of: "Does your bike have computer controlled suspension? Then shut your piehole, this baby is from the future!"
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    I'd be the perfect candidate but I'm a registered man*****, registered in all 50 states and most countries.
    You see, their morals, their code...it's a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these...These "civilized" people...they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve

  9. #9
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    I tore off my clothes while reading the OP. My brother is non too thrilled.
    Now I am going to need a new roommate. Thanks.

  10. #10
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AEO View Post
    I thought of applying, but then I realized I'd only wear skimpy clothing around you.
    So tempting... but no.

  11. #11
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UnsafeAlpine View Post
    PM sent.
    I don't think your sister wants to move to Canada and she is far from being repulsive.

  12. #12
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DataJunkie View Post
    I tore off my clothes while reading the OP. My brother is non too thrilled.
    Now I am going to need a new roommate. Thanks.
    See ??

    This is what I have to deal with here.

  13. #13
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ilikebikes View Post
    I'd be the perfect candidate but I'm a registered man*****, registered in all 50 states and most countries.
    But you are hideous.

    j/k

  14. #14
    Senior Member Snicklefritz's Avatar
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    I think Botto would fit most of the descriptions you specify.

  15. #15
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Snicklefritz View Post
    I think Botto would fit most of the descriptions you specify.
    Sure enough... but he is too damn sexy for anyone to handle.

  16. #16
    Senior Member travelmama's Avatar
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    Good luck to you on your post. I am searching for the same here in California. I am nothing but serious however, my "want ads" seem to attract too many that don't have their crap together. Too many flakes around.
    Two Wheels One Love

  17. #17
    Senior Member Snicklefritz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sixty Fiver View Post
    Sure enough... but he is too damn sexy for anyone to handle.
    perhaps, but most of his posts are off-putting enough to counteract any attractiveness he may or may not have so I think you are safe.

  18. #18
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by travelmama View Post
    Good luck to you on your post. I am searching for the same here in California. I am nothing but serious however, my "want ads" seem to attract too many that don't have their crap together. Too many flakes around.
    Wanna move to Canada ?

  19. #19
    Senior Member
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    who would want to live on the wrong side of the rocks anyway,you get snow over there and can't ride all winter,all ten months of it.

  20. #20
    Strong with the Fred Big_e's Avatar
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    I'd apply but I'd have to find some way of getting around the vow of celibacy. Not to mention, ya'll may not like the way I practice on my charango until the wee hours of the morning (not that I'm any good). Huayno anybody?
    Ernest
    I love pho long time.

  21. #21
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by overthehillmedi View Post
    who would want to live on the wrong side of the rocks anyway,you get snow over there and can't ride all winter,all ten months of it.
    Wuss.

    I ride all winter.

  22. #22
    Still can't climb
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    i have terrible habits. i break wind a lot. when can i move in?
    coasting, few quotes are worthy of him, and of those, even fewer printable in a family forum......quote 3alarmer

  23. #23
    Senior Member travelmama's Avatar
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    Canada is TOO cold for me, even in the summer. I will stay here in California with the flakes and circus clowns.
    Two Wheels One Love

  24. #24
    oldie lost her password
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    Are you seriously having a problem finding a platonic housemate, male of female? I've had tons of roommates of both genders and nothing ever happened. It was never discussed as an issue. It was simply understood that we were sharing living quarters in order to save money, and that any "hanky panky" would ruin that arangement. I made a few friends that way, but never got into sex or relationships.
    When I ride, the troubles just roll off my back.

  25. #25
    . botto's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Snicklefritz View Post
    I think Botto would fit most of the descriptions you specify.
    looky here! an anklebiter with cankles.

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