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Old 06-30-10, 05:15 PM   #1
bluevelo
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Yes. I'm also a little freaking out and fixating...

Some of you may recall that both of my parents died in the past year... Dad on June 19th and Mom on Dec 31st... anyway, I sold their house earlier this month to a flipper - it is the house I grew up in, we moved there in 1966 when I was almost 5, and it needed a lot of work so ergo the flipper sale (plus, living in California, I really have no need for a house in Iowa that's not located in Iowa City (I would've seriously considered keeping it if it'd been in IC and not Des Moines)).

Anyway, the flipper has started work according to my BFF (who is closer than a brother to me). Its not white anymore. Tan - interesting color choice... and they've removed the screens on the side porch - he thinks the side porch is a comin' off, but we'll see (if I'd remodeled, I would've converted it into a sun room or small office).

I didn't have that much attachment - I thought - to the house, but now, I'm feeling very nosy about what kind of renovations that Castle-that-used-to-be-Castle-Carson is undergoing.
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Old 06-30-10, 05:22 PM   #2
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you are wondering what they're doing. No harm in that. I fail to see your attachment for the house because you refer to it as a house instead of a home. I think you have a good seperation of object and memories.
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Old 06-30-10, 05:29 PM   #3
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you are wondering what they're doing. No harm in that. I fail to see your attachment for the house because you refer to it as a house instead of a home. I think you have a good seperation of object and memories.
There's a lot of renovation stuff I would have done. New kitchen, I would have enclosed the side porch, refinished the hardwood floors (yanked out the carpet), modern bathroom upstairs. The garage fell down years ago, the flipper is planning to add a new 2 car garage to the property. And waterproof the basement...
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Old 06-30-10, 05:32 PM   #4
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You spent a lot of time there. It's understandable that you wonder what's becoming of it.

A house that I lived in for less than six months as a kid has been radically remodeled since, as has an apartment complex I lived in when much younger, as has the house my parents lived in when I was born. I'd accept a tour of either of the first two in a second, and wouldn't mind seeing the inside of the third, even though I don't remember it at all (moved out when I was two).

I mean, damn, I'd love to see what's become of cars I used to drive/ride in.
The woman that sold the house for me - I went to high school with her - is going to get pics and a tour of the interior when the flipper finishes and puts the house back on the market. Its a 1940 cape cod sans dormers, 1 1/2 baths, 2 bedrooms upstairs, a potential downstairs bedroom, full basement. You could have a really nice rec room in the basement if you get the basement properly waterproofed... all nice hardwood floors. The kitchen was redone in the 70s and needs to be completely torn out, and the house doesn't have a shower, just a tub upstairs so I imagine that bathroom is getting a remodel...
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Old 07-02-10, 11:46 AM   #5
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Let it go, you can only cause yourself pain, either emotional or financial, by keeping in touch with your old house.
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Old 07-02-10, 12:03 PM   #6
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My wife and I bought the house that I grew up in from my parents some 12 years ago. Means I have spent almost half my life in one house. We talk about selling,but I am not sure I could. I love that house, so I can understand what you are going through Blue, to some extent anyway. I am lucky to have both my parents alive still, so the house is not as much of a link to them as yours is / was. Hope you can find peace, knowing that someone else is going to be enjoying the house soon and beginning to form their own memories in it.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 07-02-10, 12:11 PM   #7
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amigo, for you.

Silent Lucidity


just seems like you might find some comfort in the words.
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Old 07-02-10, 12:45 PM   #8
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I know the feeling. When the new owners of the home I lived in for 18 years of my life got it, I was saddened by all the stuff work they did to it. Removed so much of the true carpentry my dad put into the home... Its not the same anymore.
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Old 07-02-10, 01:10 PM   #9
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Your heart is in the place that you spent a lot of time with your family. I would be nosy too. My first house purchased was the house in which I grew up in. I have never left for the very reasons you mentioned. I had a granny flat added to the back so that my father could live there and watch over my house should I ever decide to rent it out. As much as I want to, I can't fathom another group of people living here without me because I know they will not appreciate this home like I have for 38 years. I will NEVER sell this one.
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Old 07-02-10, 02:30 PM   #10
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Resist temptation. My dad got to see some of the changes the new owner of our lake home had done - a home he built with his own two hands. They'd painted the hand-stained tongue and groove wood ceiling white - along with the cabinets and other stained wood trim. I don't think anyone, to this day, can bring up the old lake home without him grumbling about it.
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Old 07-02-10, 05:34 PM   #11
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You're lucky it's still there, the 1800 sq ft house I grew up in was knocked down and now there's a 4500 sq ft McMansion in its place.
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Old 07-02-10, 06:14 PM   #12
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Resist temptation. My dad got to see some of the changes the new owner of our lake home had done - a home he built with his own two hands. They'd painted the hand-stained tongue and groove wood ceiling white - along with the cabinets and other stained wood trim. I don't think anyone, to this day, can bring up the old lake home without him grumbling about it.
That's one of my biggest gripes... painting stained wood.

The home I grew up in had stained wood siding... it was gorgeous. Now it's painted some ugly ass green color.
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Old 07-02-10, 07:35 PM   #13
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I'm in the exact opposite situation.

When the parental units sold the home wot I grew up in, the buyer negotiated for them to leave everything. Not just appliances but carpets, curtains, the lot, which is less common in Britain than it is in the States. She said liked the house just as it was, so good luck to her. That was over 20 years ago.

I recently took a look at it on Google Earth and from the outside at least, it still looks exactly the same. Same trim color, same layout in the front garden and I'm pretty sure...the same curtains.

It's actually a little creepy.
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Old 07-03-10, 06:08 AM   #14
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I think it's normal to want to see the changes. In the 70's I went back to see the 1st place I ever lived - we moved when I was 9. The backyard had sprouted an entire new house! The huge screened in side porch, the rose trellis, raised gardens, patio and garage where all a sky blue ranch house. It was weird. A few years ago, on the way back from a NORBA race in VT, we swing through the town we had moved to. Now, THAT was a mistake! The huge 1920's boarding house that became our family home from 1965 - 1990 (8 bedrooms, 4.5 baths in assorted 1920's designer colors!!) had reverted to a boarding house, and a junky one, at that. It was disappointing and sad.
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Old 07-03-10, 09:35 AM   #15
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Once the remodeling is done, the real estate agent is going to drop by and get pictures and send them to me so I can see how my childhood home has changed. I think it will be for the better... the house desperately needed remodeled and some repairs.
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Old 07-03-10, 07:38 PM   #16
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Often when I visit my parents - I drive by to see the home I grew up in - at least part of my life. I often wonder if they found all the snakes I lost in that house back when I used to keep snakes in my room...
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Old 07-04-10, 08:27 AM   #17
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When the folks sold to a builder who wanted to renovate the house for his daughter, I got a weird, displaced feeling.
My wife got curious, went by there during the reconstruction, was treated well by the new owner and shown around, told of the various plans and features. She tried to tell me the details; I stopped her.

I refuse to go there. It may seem childish, but the place will remain a series of snapshots in my mind, frozen in time forever. It is as real to me as anything can possibly be.
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Old 07-04-10, 09:37 AM   #18
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When my dad sold the house I'd lived in from 10-20ish, he asked what the guy was going to do with the property. Buyer said he'd leave it as is, so he sold it.

He stripped it - cut down 20 or more full grown trees and pulled out almost all the plants. Dad said he could have got $100 000 for all the plants there. The neighbours weren't happy because they bought their house because of ours - trimmed down the bushes between houses so they could sit on their verandah and watch the birds and mongooses in our yard. The yard is mostly grass now, where before it used to look like a jungle.

Also turned the downstairs office into a two car garage.
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Old 07-04-10, 09:59 AM   #19
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The wife and I once owned a house that had been built in 1783. There was still a fair amount of original detail in the house that had been covered up by the previous owners, and that we were able to restore somewhat. We haven't lived there for 14 years but I still look at it whenever we go by and wonder what the new owners have done. for instance, I took down the old shutters to clean them and repaint them, and try to fix them up a bit (some of the wood was rotted). I never got around to it, and they are still not up. I want to go in and ask them what happened with that. It's not our house any more but you can't help wondering. It's a little different though with such an old house--you feel like no matter how long you live there, you're just passing through.
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