BF's Level 12 Wizard
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Tucson, AZ
Bikes: Diamondback Sorrento turned Xtracycle commuter
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First off, a vocal coach can help you more than Foo. That said, you over emphasize much of the words, using your words as percussion and placeholders. If you want to be lyrical get a little softer with your words. Your tone also seems a bit flat, but that's really common (look how successful Barbara Streisand is!). You have great lyrics, though. I quite like the song!
EDIT: You're not a bad singer, just raw. A couple lessons of focused drills and one-on-one pointers will turn you into a more refined singer.
Shameless plug (my sites):
Originally Posted by Bklyn
Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.